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Old Mar 29th, 2017, 21:24 PM   341
Cppeace
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That's wonderful news Waypast. I hope it all works out. Enjoy



 
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Old Mar 31st, 2017, 04:51 AM   342
Hopeful Cat
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Hi ladies, my baby girl was concieved with donor sperm because my husband has azoospermia. She is almost 1 and we love her to bits!! Hope you all get success stories ☺ we are getting ready to start again and have a frozen embryo waiting. We've used an unknown donor through our ivf clinic



 
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Old Apr 20th, 2017, 20:35 PM   343
Aleriya
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We are using donor sperm, because we are a same-sex couple. Our egg retrieval is set for May 15th. I didn't get to read all the forum posts, but I would naturally assume donor sperm to be highly viable since it has passed all the screening.

Those of you who used donor sperm, when you look at the child do you ever wish you knew the donor? We went with identifiable as that is what is required here. I personally wish I could spend time and have a chat with the donor. As where my partner prefers that we don't know the donor.

Another question, did your clinic suggest that you start telling your child as young as 2 that they are a child of a donor? There was this whole counselling session we had to sit through. I'm still not sure how you would work that into a conversation with a 2 year old.

Thanks!



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Old Apr 22nd, 2017, 08:14 AM   344
Hopeful Cat
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I talk to my girl about donor background now and again...i think it helps to start well before they can understand so that you can get it sorted in your own head and it feels more natural. I do not wish to know our donor, there is curiosity but no desire to ever meet unless my baby wants that.



 
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Old Apr 22nd, 2017, 11:58 AM   345
DeuceMom
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Aleriya View Post

Those of you who used donor sperm, when you look at the child do you ever wish you knew the donor? We went with identifiable as that is what is required here. I personally wish I could spend time and have a chat with the donor. As where my partner prefers that we don't know the donor.

Another question, did your clinic suggest that you start telling your child as young as 2 that they are a child of a donor? There was this whole counselling session we had to sit through. I'm still not sure how you would work that into a conversation with a 2 year old.

Thanks!
Perhaps on occasion, I do wonder about meeting the donor, but as a Choice Mom I really get concerned about legalities and influential interactions before my kids are grown. I've used an open donor, though, so my children may have one contact (not necessarily in person) if they chose to when they are of age because I do think it's important they have that option. I would never want to lock away half their genetic links or keep their donor conception a secret.

My children are 6 months next week, and I've already started "the talk" by reading them books about their conception. I want them to grow up without ever having known different or suddenly "discovering" their origins. I bought "The Pea that was Me" by Kimberly Kluger-Bell geared toward "A Single Mom's Sperm Donation Story", but they have a version geared toward "A Two Moms' Sperm Donation Story." Granted, it isn't the all time BEST book ever because there are some assumptions about "nice doctors" and such. For my situation, there is not a book geared toward twin outcomes, but I can definitely fill in those blanks or draw the comparisons when we get to those pages. There are some other books too, but they also have their issues. Still, reading a child a story opens the channels for conversation about topics that might not otherwise come up spontaneously until too late.



 
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Old Apr 25th, 2017, 17:03 PM   346
mangotango
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Aleriya View Post
We are using donor sperm, because we are a same-sex couple. Our egg retrieval is set for May 15th. I didn't get to read all the forum posts, but I would naturally assume donor sperm to be highly viable since it has passed all the screening.

Those of you who used donor sperm, when you look at the child do you ever wish you knew the donor? We went with identifiable as that is what is required here. I personally wish I could spend time and have a chat with the donor. As where my partner prefers that we don't know the donor.

Another question, did your clinic suggest that you start telling your child as young as 2 that they are a child of a donor? There was this whole counselling session we had to sit through. I'm still not sure how you would work that into a conversation with a 2 year old.

Thanks!
Aleriya- good question! I look at our daughter who is 2 now and rarely think of her as anything other than my husband's. Sometimes I say a prayer and thank that the donor gave us this amazing child and I do wonder what he is like because she is AMAZING and smart and I'm sure some of it comes from him- although she does have a lot of me! LOL Unfortunately we didn't get back to our donor bank soon enough so we never purchased extra vials and are going through this again with a new donor- with much more trouble this time.

As for telling our daughter- our clinic psych has really pushed us to tell her and I find no reason to at this point...how DO you tell a 2 year old? Also for us, not many people know my husband has sperm issues (zero sperm) so we don't want her running around like a2 or 3 year old does saying things about sperm and letting our secret out to everyone- which is very private. At this point we don't barely think about it being from a donor- because she is our child.



 
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