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Old Dec 6th, 2010, 08:41 AM   11
mjo
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I know this thread is almost a month old but I was googling soft cups and at-home insemination, and this forum popped up. I enjoyed reading the replies and wanted to add mine to it

1. If you used a donor (rather than your spouse), how did you find your donor? My partner and I are using a donor. He is a very good long-term friend that has his own family, and when we started talking about donors a year ago, he volunteered his services. We've known him for almost 14 years and he's possibly the only person I'd trust with being a known donor.
2. What method(s) did you use to track ovulation We're using a BBT chart and OPK strips
3. What method(s) of insemination did you use We're having our donor ejaculate into the soft cup and then within a few minutes, my partner inserts the soft cup. Pretty straight-forward. We tried the first time with a syringe and no cup, and it was messy and awful. We've used the soft cups for 3/4 attempts.
4. How many times per cycle did you inseminate and what was the timing relative to ovulation (e.g. 2 days before and day of)? We try to inseminate a few days before the positive opk [we just did insem #1 of this cycle at cd15; my partner usually gets a pos opk around cd18 or 19]. We're trying to do another pre-ovulation insem in the next day or two, and then we insem the day OF the positive when possible and DEFINITELY the day after getting the pos opk. So we inseminate usually 2-3 times, at least.
5. Logistics. Where did you meet your donor and how did the donation occur? Our donor lives 2 hours away, so it's on us to drive to his town, to his house. He's moving even farther away in a month or two so it will be worse then lol...As of now, we go to his house and hang out and chat for 10 minutes or so, then he goes and does his business. We inseminate in his bathroom, then chat a bit and leave. The whole thing may take 45 minutes with only 10 of those minutes roughly being for actual insemination purposes. It's very comfortable since he's a good friend. Sometimes we all go grab some dinner afterwards, and it isn't weird at all.
6. Did it work? If so, how many cycles did it take? It hasn't worked for us yet. We tried once in February and then took a long break for personal reasons, then started again in October. This month is our 3rd attempt in a row. I'm hoping it happens soon because my partner will be switching jobs next year and we'll have to take a break in March or so if it doesn't work in the next few months. I love hearing about people that get BFPs the first 5 cycles or so...I hope it happens for us too, but we'll see.
7. If you used a donor, what is the relationship you have (or intend to have) with your donor? Our donor has always been and always will be a close friend to us, so he will inevitably know our child, but he will fulfill the role of an 'uncle' - he's clear that he has no parental rights, no custody, and we will not ask for financial support. He has 3 kids of his own, and we've talked at length about the emotional difference between sperm donation and actually conceiving a child on his own. We are all on the same page, and that's one of the reasons we call him our 'dream donor'
8. Anything else you think people should know? I don't have much advice, except that EVERYONE AND THEIR MOTHER will want to ask questions and more than that they will want to tell you how to do a better job at ttc as if you aren't spending all your spare time reading and researching methods and statistics and stuff. Just shrug it off but be prepared to. We met a new acquaintance through a friend at a party a few weeks back, and she happened to be a doula. Within an hour of meeting my partner and I, she was giving us completely uninformed advice on how to inseminate my partner. RUDE!! To everyone ttc - Educate yourself and then trust in your knowledge. Only take advice from doctors! Not to stereotype, but a lot of heterosexual couples we meet think they naturally know more about conception than we do because they are straight. It's like they don't even realize they're being pretentious. Shrug. It. Off.



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Old Dec 6th, 2010, 08:45 AM   12
LunaBean
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mjo View Post
We inseminate in his bathroom, then chat a bit and leave. The whole thing may take 45 minutes with only 10 of those minutes roughly being for actual insemination purposes. It's very comfortable since he's a good friend. Sometimes we all go grab some dinner afterwards, and it isn't weird at all.
I was just thinking, if you're inseminating in his bathroom, I'm assuming you aren't lying down while doing it, or for 30 minutes afterwards? It's usually a good idea to do it lying down,so gravity can help abit!! Cus of you're up and about straight away afterwards, it'll all be sitting in the softcup, as opposed to up near your cervix! Just a sugestion!!



 
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Old Dec 6th, 2010, 08:49 AM   13
topazicatzbet
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i never laid down and got my bfp twice now, the soft cup holds it around your cervix so your actually best sat so the cervic dips right into it rather than laying down.



 
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Old Dec 6th, 2010, 09:04 AM   14
mjo
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LunaBean View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by mjo View Post
We inseminate in his bathroom, then chat a bit and leave. The whole thing may take 45 minutes with only 10 of those minutes roughly being for actual insemination purposes. It's very comfortable since he's a good friend. Sometimes we all go grab some dinner afterwards, and it isn't weird at all.
I was just thinking, if you're inseminating in his bathroom, I'm assuming you aren't lying down while doing it, or for 30 minutes afterwards? It's usually a good idea to do it lying down,so gravity can help abit!! Cus of you're up and about straight away afterwards, it'll all be sitting in the softcup, as opposed to up near your cervix! Just a sugestion!!
Well, we just don't have much of an option for lying down. We are travelling a few hours across the state to do it, and getting a hotel every month wouldn't be affordable and I can't really ask to borrow his bed lol. But after a few attempts, my partner did lie down in the backseat with hips elevated on part of the drive home...We just do what we can and use a trial-and-error approach. And like the previous commenter said - the cup keeps the sperm against her cervix so lying down isn't too too too necessary. I agree it might not hurt, just isn't in the cards for us as the situation is at the moment. Thanks though for the input!!



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Old Dec 6th, 2010, 09:05 AM   15
mjo
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Quote:
Originally Posted by topazicatzbet View Post
i never laid down and got my bfp twice now, the soft cup holds it around your cervix so your actually best sat so the cervic dips right into it rather than laying down.
How many cycles did it take you to get your bfps?

Did you put the sperm directly in the cup?



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Old Dec 6th, 2010, 09:10 AM   16
LunaBean
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You could totally ask to use his bed I guess if she softcup holds it right up close then its ok, I cud never get it to work for me, it kept coming half out and hurting me! I did get a bfp with it still tho,lol



 
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Old Dec 6th, 2010, 09:11 AM   17
Nimyra
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Thanks everyone for posting so far! I'm sure the responses will be very helpful to people just getting started. My intention is still to have this thread be only posts following the format (what you did etc), and to keep advice and support to the other thread. Thanks!!!



 
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Old Dec 9th, 2010, 17:08 PM   18
xMissxZoiex
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Hey ladies, i hope you dont mind me joining here

Questions:
1. If you used a donor (rather than your spouse), how did you find your donor
We are using my DFs this cycle and next cycle but the cycle after that (And how ever many cycles it takes me to get preg) we are using a donor we found on http://forums.tadpoletown.com Its a free forum

2. What method(s) did you use to track ovulation
I am using the Clearblue Fertility monitor, Boots fertility monitor, OPKs and Clearblue digital smily face tests (Got my peak today )

3. What method(s) of insemination did you use
We are using a specimen jar and syringe and trying to insert the sperm into my cervix

4. How many times per cycle did you inseminate and what was the timing relative to ovulation (e.g. 2 days before and day of)?
This cycle we Inseminated on CD13 CD15 CD16 (Today) And planning doing it tomorrow aswell. (We also BDed a few times aswell)

5. Logistics. Where did you meet your donor and how did the donation occur?
Online and we have only spoke via email. but he has agreed to do our donations at our home.

6. Did it work? If so, how many cycles did it take?
We will soon find out

7. If you used a donor, what is the relationship you have (or intend to have) with your donor?
Our donor will have no contact apart from to tell him when i have deliverd the baby and/or if we want another baby from him which he has said he will do in the future

8. Anything else you think people should know?
Urmmmm Well we are a straight couple, we have been TTC for three years (Almost) DF has low sperm motility (Lazy sperm).

I think thats it. x



 
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Old Dec 14th, 2010, 00:12 AM   19
alisurro
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I should preface this by saying I was/am a surrogate. My second IP's (intended parents) decided to use donor sperm for a few reasons. So it was in a sense a planned adoption.

Questions:
1. If you used a donor (rather than your spouse), how did you find your donor


My IP's chose a donor from a bank in WA, one of the few banks in the US that would ship the sperm to my home vs. a clinic.

2. What method(s) did you use to track ovulation

I've been charting for years (CM, CP and temp). I also used OPK's.

3. What method(s) of insemination did you use

Syringe with Instead Cup, along with orgasm following insemination.

4. How many times per cycle did you inseminate and what was the timing relative to ovulation (e.g. 2 days before and day of)?

Well, our paperwork got to the bank very last minute, so they shipped the sperm out in the tank a mere day before my ovulation. I got it the day ovulation was to happen, so I used BOTH vials that day. I did one around 12pm and the next around 5pm. If we had had time, I would have done the day before and day of, since the sperm needs to be waiting in the tubes when a woman ovulates (better than doing the insem when the egg has already emerged!).

5. Logistics. Where did you meet your donor and how did the donation occur?

See above. For my second journey, we used a bank. For the first journey, my IP's chose to use IF's sperm (intended father's). So he stayed at a hotel near my home, did his thing in the hotel room, then wrapped the syringe in a wash cloth, tucked it under his arm to keep it warm and drove it to my house.

6. Did it work? If so, how many cycles did it take?

First journey with the IF staying in the hotel, it took on our third cycle. The second journey when we used donor sperm from a bank, it took on the first cycle.

7. If you used a donor, what is the relationship you have (or intend to have) with your donor?

N/A since I am a surrogate.

8. Anything else you think people should know?

Not at this time.



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Old Dec 16th, 2010, 16:28 PM   20
Annabear
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1. If you used a donor (rather than your spouse), how did you find your donor
We started looking around our friends, acquaintances etc first. We thought we found our perfect donor (our friend) but that turned out to be a little disaster. his OH didnt agree and we were without a donor. Then we got a tip from LunaBean (Lizzy) to put up an ad on a gay community website and we got loadsss of offers. We finally met some and picked out perfect donor!

2. What method(s) did you use to track ovulation
All I ever use are those little test strips for ovulation surge.

3. What method(s) of insemination did you use
Haven't used anything yet, but we will be using a seringe and a cup lolol

4. How many times per cycle did you inseminate and what was the timing relative to ovulation (e.g. 2 days before and day of)?
We are going to try to do it before and after the surge.

5. Logistics. Where did you meet your donor and how did the donation occur?
We are going to have to drive 178 km to Dublin, stay in a hotel for 2 nights and meet the donor at night time were he will be given a cup and appointed a (bath)room.

6. Did it work? If so, how many cycles did it take?
January will be our first try! sooo excited!

7. If you used a donor, what is the relationship you have (or intend to have) with your donor?
Non-existent. the donor wishes to stay completely anonymous.

8. Anything else you think people should know?
I feel it is really important to stay positive and to make a deal with your own body, try to mentally prepare. I always had a terribly unregular cycle, since we started TTC my cycle is perfectly on track and I feel ready as ever

Good luck to everyone!!!

LOTS OF LOVE !!!



 
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