I have to tell him to play with LO, otherwise he'd happily leave her on her mat all day whilst he sat and watched tv or played games. Then I have to tell him HOW to play with her I.e "why don't you get a toy out for her?". He's always getting distracted by tv so he's sat there on the floor holding a toy in front of her face while staring at the tv, hardly interacting with her at all. Drives me crazy.
When I moan about never getting a break he turns around a d says "I've just given you one" Whoop de do 5mins of you playing with/holding her whilst I still have to give instructions on what to do. Compared to the freedom and full nights sleep he gets every night. I could understand me having to instruct him at first but by now he should be able to take at least some initiative shouldn't he?
He moans that she just wants mummy but what does he expect when he doesn't put the effort in. I'm always encouraging him to spend time with her but I just seems so half hearted or he does it for 5mins and then stops. I'm hoping when she get older and "more fun" he will get better.
Mine used to be like this. He would just watch telly while she sat on his knee, and if she cried she automatically wanted mummy he said. Looking back, I think it was just hard for him to know how to entertain her as she cried a lot.
These days he loves playing and they're always crawling round after each other. You might find that as your baby becomes more interactive it's easier for your OH to play with her as it'll be more fun and he will know what to do
Totally agree with Bev - once your LO is more mobile, it will be much easier for your OH to "play" with her. Now that Charlotte crawls all over the place, my DH loves getting on the floor with her and playing games.
My DH has always been hands on with our children, but he's especially good with our daughter, I put it down to the big age gap and us both being older now (I'm 41 and he's 48).
My ex-partner and father of my 23 year old son was just the same as you describe when our son was young, he was never prepared to help out at all.
Yep! My OH is like this! He'd give her a little cuddle then put her back in her bouncer. I do kind of hope that when she's bit more active that he'll play more with her.
Also when he is giving her a longer cuddle then usual, if she starts moaning he instantly gives her to me and says to her "if you keep moaning I'll pass you to your mother". Obviously he isn't stupid and knows she can't understand him but its annoying as why have I got to settle her when she's moaning. It's his job too!
Mine is the same... he takes LO in the morning for an hour or so so I can have some sleep as I do the nights and he has a full nights sleep...
Well you think that one hour he was a saint the way he acts like hes done so much for me!!!
Ummmm LO is OUR baby!
Like the days he washes the dishes for ME... hoovers for ME.... again its OUR house and yet he's doing ME a favour??!! 9 times out of 10 I have to redo the dishes etc as he does a half hearted attempt at best!
Thats men for ya!
His looking after LO is different to my version of looking after LO... I play with LO, try and help him along with his developments stages, ready him black and white books etc... Hubby places LO in his bouncer or jumper in front of the TV and thats it... honestly!!! I end up butting in as I feel bad for LO... so not really a break!
Yep, exactly this! He just doesn't know how to play with her and even when he does he has a shorter attention span than her, pretty amazing considering she's not even 4 months old yet. What really annoys me is when she gets bored and pissed off he decides she must be tired and tries to shove her dummy in her mouth and force her to sleep. ARRGGHH she's not tired she's bored and now she's really angry and I have to calm her down!!
I feel like this too. Guess it really is a guy thing. Last night I was making dinner and cookies at the same time and asked him to watch K for me. We were all in the kitchen together and she was in her highchair with toys. After a while she got bored and started fussing so he picked her up, but sat there holding her while typing on the computer still. Um yeah thats not going to work. She kept fussing and fussing and he wouldn't interact with her. I eventually snatched her up and finished cleaning the kitchen while he was on the comp doing something he could have done after she went to bed! argh.. That DOES NOT count. He said, oh but I fed her too. Again, something so easy that doesn't require interaction.
Any opinions, advice, statements or other information expressed or made available on BabyandBump.Momtastic.com by users or third parties, including but not limited to bloggers, are solely those of the respective user or other third party. They do not reflect the opinions of BabyandBump.Momtastic.com and they have not been reviewed by a physician, psychologist or parenting expert or any member of the BabyandBump.Momtastic.com staff for accuracy, balance or objectivity. Content and other information presented on BabyandBump.Momtastic.com are not a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice, counseling, diagnosis, or treatment. Never delay or disregard seeking professional medical or mental health advice from your physician or other qualified health provider because of something you have read on BabyandBump.Momtastic.com. BabyandBump.Momtastic.com does not endorse any opinion, advice, statement, product, service or treatment made available on the website. If you think you have a medical emergency, call your doctor or emergency services immediately.