Being made to feel bad for wanting what my heart wants. :(

lesh07 · Feb 25th, 2012, 07:36 AM

Hi ladies......Just as the title says, I am being made to feel bad for my desire to have more children. I already have a boy, 3 girls and then my new little baby boy born 2 weeks ago who I love to bits and enjoy spending loads of time with all of them. But when people ask if we are going to have anymore I say I would if hubby wanted too and these people look at me in disgust and start saying "honestly, Don't you think you have enough" All my children are well looked after, Have everything they need and want pretty much and get plenty of 1 on 1 time with both me and their dad. So what is so wrong with wanting more children? I have always desired to have a large family.

lindseymw · Feb 25th, 2012, 08:01 AM

Whose business is it if you want more chlidren? As long as you can support yourself & afford it, have as many as you like I say!

amygwen · Feb 25th, 2012, 08:02 AM

It's no one's business if you can financially, emotionally and physically support more children.

aley28 · Feb 25th, 2012, 09:03 AM

I come from a huge family (9 kids!) and loved having so many siblings. I could never judge somebody for wanting a large family ... I usually find myself encouraging them

What I don't understand is why people even ask if you're thinking about having more if they're just going to get disgusted with you if you're honest with them.

If they're going to be rude about it, the least they can do is just keep the question to themselves and move on!

paigekins · Feb 25th, 2012, 09:24 AM

That's no one's business but yours! If you want them and can support them financially and emotionally, more power to you.

Lawhra · Feb 25th, 2012, 09:27 AM

Ignore those who feel it's ok to judge and decide what is right. It is none of their business.

Ozzieshunni · Feb 25th, 2012, 09:47 AM

I say, have more if you and hubby can emotionally, physically, and financially (to a degree) support them.

The financial bit means if you or hubby are working. I don't like people that have kids just to stay on benefits, but I'm totally sure that's not you

My DH works and claims CTC/WTC, but that's different imo.

Eternal · Feb 25th, 2012, 09:51 AM

If you and your partner can support the kids financially by yourselves and are able to give them the time, love and support they need I dont see how its is anyone elses business.

I have had people ask if we will have more, i have three, a 2 year old and 3 month old twins, and in the beginning (before I realise how hard twins and a two year old are) yes, and people would make comments, and I just said, I dont see how its anoyones elses business, we receive no benefits so the kids are provided for by us, we they are well cared for and happy, so how is it anyone elses business?

Ozzieshunni · Feb 25th, 2012, 09:55 AM

Just reading back, I hope I made sense in my answer. My brain is a bit mush today

PinkGlitter87 · Feb 25th, 2012, 10:47 AM

Do whatever makes you happy hun, if you can provide a nice loving family and be financially secure then why not have more! x x x

Feb 25th, 2012, 07:36 AM	#1
lesh07 Trying to conceive (TTC) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 1,049	Being made to feel bad for wanting what my heart wants. :( Hi ladies......Just as the title says, I am being made to feel bad for my desire to have more children. I already have a boy, 3 girls and then my new little baby boy born 2 weeks ago who I love to bits and enjoy spending loads of time with all of them. But when people ask if we are going to have anymore I say I would if hubby wanted too and these people look at me in disgust and start saying "honestly, Don't you think you have enough" All my children are well looked after, Have everything they need and want pretty much and get plenty of 1 on 1 time with both me and their dad. So what is so wrong with wanting more children? I have always desired to have a large family.

Status: Offline

Feb 25th, 2012, 08:01 AM	#2
lindseymw Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: North Yorks Posts: 3,100	Whose business is it if you want more chlidren? As long as you can support yourself & afford it, have as many as you like I say!

Status: Offline

Feb 25th, 2012, 08:02 AM	#3
amygwen Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: San Antonio, Texas Posts: 9,581	It's no one's business if you can financially, emotionally and physically support more children.

Status: Offline

Feb 25th, 2012, 09:03 AM	#4
aley28 Other BnB Addict Join Date: Mar 2011 Location: Wyoming, USA Posts: 7,689	I come from a huge family (9 kids!) and loved having so many siblings. I could never judge somebody for wanting a large family ... I usually find myself encouraging them What I don't understand is why people even ask if you're thinking about having more if they're just going to get disgusted with you if you're honest with them. If they're going to be rude about it, the least they can do is just keep the question to themselves and move on!

Status: Online

Feb 25th, 2012, 09:24 AM	#5
paigekins Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Feb 2011 Location: Minneapolis Posts: 663	That's no one's business but yours! If you want them and can support them financially and emotionally, more power to you.

Status: Offline

Feb 25th, 2012, 09:27 AM	#6
Lawhra Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: South West Posts: 2,788	Ignore those who feel it's ok to judge and decide what is right. It is none of their business.

Status: Offline

Feb 25th, 2012, 09:47 AM	#7
Ozzieshunni Mum (Mom) BnB Elite Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 19,286	I say, have more if you and hubby can emotionally, physically, and financially (to a degree) support them. The financial bit means if you or hubby are working. I don't like people that have kids just to stay on benefits, but I'm totally sure that's not you My DH works and claims CTC/WTC, but that's different imo.

Status: Offline

Feb 25th, 2012, 09:51 AM	#8
Eternal Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Swansea, Wales Posts: 8,004	If you and your partner can support the kids financially by yourselves and are able to give them the time, love and support they need I dont see how its is anyone elses business. I have had people ask if we will have more, i have three, a 2 year old and 3 month old twins, and in the beginning (before I realise how hard twins and a two year old are) yes, and people would make comments, and I just said, I dont see how its anoyones elses business, we receive no benefits so the kids are provided for by us, we they are well cared for and happy, so how is it anyone elses business?

Status: Offline

Feb 25th, 2012, 09:55 AM	#9
Ozzieshunni Mum (Mom) BnB Elite Join Date: Jan 2010 Posts: 19,286	Just reading back, I hope I made sense in my answer. My brain is a bit mush today

Status: Offline

Feb 25th, 2012, 10:47 AM	#10
PinkGlitter87 Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: May 2011 Location: County Durham, UK Posts: 784	Do whatever makes you happy hun, if you can provide a nice loving family and be financially secure then why not have more! x x x

Status: Offline

User Name		Remember Me?
Password