thats horrible, poor you. If my MIL did that I would be demanding it to be deleted. I found it bad enough my MIL being in the same room as me a few hours after giving birth due to being so uncomfortable. I cant believe your OH isnt supporting you, could you tell OH if he wants to see his mum he can go see her on his own, I told my DH that its my first mothers day so I wanted to celebrate in with our own little family and my LO is neerly 8 months (he is quite understanding as my mum can wind him up as well). I cant believe your OH made you have MIL in room while giving birth, hes meant to be there to support you its such a personal thing. I have made it quite clear my LO wont be staying with MIL as I dont trust her, I have yet to be away from my baby. I was told made it clear from the start what ground rules are or people walk all over you, people did try and I am quite a shy person anyway, it took me deciding that I didnt believe it was best for my daughter and me sticking up for myself is sticking up for her. As others have said I also use the breastfeeding excuse to be able to get time for myself with LO. My MIL is now getting the idea finally
this is so wrong. hun you dont have to do anything you dont want to, the stress of all this is too much. i'd keep a distance from her, her behavior doesnt sound normal. if your oh cant see that, it is his problem. you should be enjoying this time, you'll never get it back. you and your baby girl are all that matters right now. you dont want to look back and remember the stress of feeling out of control. you are in control.
ahh hun could you not ask her to remove the video from her home. Im sorry but your OH needs to grow some balls and stand up for you. Hes in the wrong also for letting her record such a private and intimate moment
I wouldn't blame her too much, she's just being an overbearing mil. I would worry about your OH though, if he doesn't take a stand and support you then you will have a problem moving forward. It is completely inappropriate that HE needed his mommy to be in the delivery room to support him. HE is the one that crossed the line, you're directing your anger towards her but she would not have been there had he not invited her in. This is not a case of having a bad mil, this is a case of having an OH who supports his mommy over his wife.
About the video. Ask her to erase it. It is a video of a very private and intimate moment of your life and body. If she does not comply take the phone when she's not looking and erase the video yourself. Treat others as they have treated you
About the photos. Ask her to take them off facebook and explain that you do not want any photos of your baby posted without your permission. If she does not comply then report the photos to facebook. This is very serious, the internet is a dangerous place to expose your baby to and if you don't want those pictures up then it is your obligation to get take them down one way or another.
About asking to take the baby. Try not to think about this too much. She'll mention it a lot just to get to you. But short of her coming over and physically tearing the baby out of your arms she has no power to take the baby. Let it go in one ear and out the other. Smile, nod and change the subject. Don't argue with her, don't tell her it's too soon, do not engage in a conversation that you do not want to have. Smile, nod, change the subject. She'll get the hint eventually.
could you maybe write down a letter to OH about how your feeling so he doesent have a chance to make excuses and answer back about it without listening (it shouldent matter if he thinks its bull shit, your his partner and mother of his child and he should respect your feelings). Me and DH have had many arguments about parents, his mother is very manipulative and can be horrible and his dad says very inapropriate things, and is sexist, on the other hand my parents dont particularly bother and we always have to take LO to see them. I get stressed seeing his parents due to as soon as DH is not there his mother is horrid. I had a very frank conversation with DH with how I was feeling and that if we were to see his parents there were ground rules as I was not going to have my LO subjected to their arguments, rudeness, and inapropriate language. Your OH should stick up for you as his family, my DH will even if he doesent always get it. Im so sorry you are being made to feel like this when it should be the time you are able to enjoy starting life as a family
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