Gonna try to write this down without making a novel... haha

I've always had a great relationship with my hubby. He's adorable, and funny, and sweet and caring and well... pretty much everything I've ever wanted. And I cannot imagine my life without him... even when he irritates me at times hehe... BUT... and here is where I feel a little bad...

Ever since our LO was born, as close as I feel to my hubby (we made this beautiful little girl)- and as much as I love him... I feel like my whole life is about my daughter. Like SHE is the reason for everything... like SHE is truly the "love of my life".

Maybe it's silly that I even feel guilty for feeling this way- and the guilt has nothing to do with the love I feel for my daughter, but like, in some way I'm not giving enough to my hubby. Like he's taken a backseat to our LO lately.

We have always had my step-daughter full time... so it's never JUST been the two of us. But the care a baby needs is so much more and I've heard that hubbies can sometimes feel a little left out. And I can tell, based on some comments he's made, that he does feel like we don't have enough time together (just the two of us) anymore. He's not jealous of LO as we both parent together and he is very involved and loves her so much (it's very sweet how he talks about her or looks at her)- but I know he misses his time with just me.

I DO want to spend more "alone" time together... but seems there are not enough hours in the day! And I know I could make a little more effort... it's just, gosh, I don't always even think about it.

I don't want to be someone who keeps saying "I'll make time"- then gets so wrapped up in everything else that I don't notice my relationship suffering. Right now, it's not- But we could spend more time alone or go out on dates more... I just need to find a way to conciously make more of an effort. Sometimes I lose track of the days and how quickly time goes by... we talked about going out, even once a week, for dinner just the two of us... but I think we've only done that maybe 2-3 times?

Any suggestions of little things I could do to make him feel "special" again. haha. That sounded a bit silly... but you get the point

Thanks ladies!

I think when a baby comes along it changes your r-ship big time!! DH and i rarely have time together as we're both tired, we try and DTD 3-4 times a week, have meals together, have a date night once a month etc or even watch TV together which sounds weird lol.

Its the little things that count instead of the big things, i find that i love DH soooo much as my LO but the thing that counts mostly is communication and making sure you listen to each other

Just sending and I will be stalking this as I am going through the same thing. I hate that I don't have much alone time with OH, but at the same time I never want LO out of my sight... I have friends who think I'm crazy for not liking leaving her, but I just love her so much. I think this is one of those things that will get better when the LO's are older

I totally agree the little things count the most... cause those are the things that happen every day! We do have great communication- so that's good... it's just finding the time or energy to actually get some quality time together (just the two of us)- as we have lots of great family time.

We do get a little time each night together after LO goes to bed (around 7:30pm)- but as I get up at 4:30am, I'm tired pretty quick- so half the time I fall asleep while we are laying bed watching TV. LOL. Maybe we just need to go to bed early as at least we'll get that snuggle time alone?

Thanks hun!

For sure!!! Much easier as they get bigger and don't need us AS much, but not really ready for that just yet haha.

I don't mind leaving LO for a bit- as I know it's healthy for me to have some me time, or friend time AND hubby time Just a lot to balance!

But right now, as my MIL watches LO while we work- I feel bad asking her to watch her more often... even though I know she would. And my Mom would help out more- but she's going through chemo- but once she kicks cancers Butt (hehe)-- she'll be available more- and I know she will LOVE being able to watch LO more often.

Best of luck to you too hun!