Im not sure if i should or not so thought id ask for some advice.
my 11 week old baby has a bath and a bottle at 7 and is in his own cot by 7:30 now i know he isnt hungry and he has a clean nappy on and i give him cuddles before hand but as soon as i leave his room he cries ..... now i dont know if i should go straight back to him or if i should leav ehim to cry for 5 mins and if he is still crying after 5 mins go to him and give him cuddles and then try again and repeat if he continues to cry is this ok to do or not ? if not what do you suggest ?
I have always responded immediately to my babies crys. When they are that little you shouldn't let them cry for more than 5 mins without going to them and responding straight away is recommended. Your baby may be crying as it wants to be near you. If it's not an hysterical cry I know some mums leave their babies to see if they will settle on their own. My baby always went straight into really upset crying so I ended up co sleeping and from then on he never cried at night as I could respond the moment he stirred.
The technique you are describing sounds similar to Ferberisation and that is only recommended if at all after 6 months.
I would not just leave the room straight away if you have to but try other soothing techniques and stay close by until your baby is in a deep sleep. Rubbing your body on the sheets to leave your smell may also help. I also found that the quicker I responded to my baby when he woke the quicker he resettled as he didn't wake fully. The reccomendations are to keep the baby in the same room as you when they are sleeping until 6 months x
It's quite unusual for a 11 week old to settle for the night at 7.30, crying and waking is the norm x
I agree. I don't leave my LO if she's crying unless it's more of a little whimper than a cry and even then I'll sit with her to try to soothe her. If she's crying I'll pick her up, sing to her, do shh pat, rock her etc. I agree about the early bedtime too. I'm trying now to get bedtime a bit earlier but mine has never settled for the night before 10pm so far! X
-My LO is 7 weeks old and sleeps in her own room between 7-10 on an evening. Some nights she is very well settled and we dont' hear a peep out of her.. other nights she will have a bit of a cry and we are up and down. Tonight she has been moany and we have been up and down the stairs like a yo yo!!!! Which is the norm I guess she is only young!
However tonight she has been extra hungry. She had 6oz between 5-7 and then another 1oz at half 7. Next time she wailed and I mean she was crying not just a little shout out I said to DH, she is still hungry as she drained the last 1oz I made her! So off he totttered to make up another bottle and by the time he had made it and got upstairs she was sound asleep! This happens quite a lot on our house she may have a little cry and a wail and by the time we get to her she is fast asleep! She is keeping us on our toes!
I think sometimes you can tell if and when her cry is going to develope into something louder and if it sounds like it is we go to her straight away.. as she is easier to settle if she isn't in full blown cries and wide awake..... If its a little moany whingey cry I leave her maybe a minute or two, or just go stand in her room and watch her to see what she is doing... You know if she is crying out and not moving I know she is more than likely going to stay asleep and if she her arms and legs are going and she is moving her head from side to side I know its going to develope into a big cry and intervene.
Trust your instincts and I know its not "right" but my granny pointed out to me the other day that "no one ever died from crying!" I am sure she meant there is a time and a place for this saying and it shouldn't be applied to an 11 week old baby! I certainly don't agree with it but it did make me chuckle when LO was wailing for her bottle the other day and I couldn't get there quick enough!
I would go in and rub his tummy for a few mins to calm him down.
I would also put him up in his room once or twice during the day while your upstairs, just to let him get used to the room/cot, Keep talking to him if you can so he knows even though he cant see you, your still there.
Thanks everyone i wasnt to sure about it as a friend suggested it but dont think i could bare to leave him anyway lol but yeah hes in a little routine i bath him and feed him at 7 and then by 7:30 hes in bed and he dosnt wake again till 2 and then 6 only crys a little when i first put him to bed and its only for a few minuets think il just stay with him till hes asleep rather than let him cry, thanks for the advice ladies x
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