Forum Rules

LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old Sep 11th, 2015, 08:28 AM   1
Mum (Mom)
BnB Addict
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Canada
Posts: 3,482

Dinner reception - what is customary in your country?

I know many users from this site are primarily from English speaking countries, with similar cultures. But I'm just curious.

I got a wedding invite to a close friend's wedding.

On the invitation, it says that the dinner reception will have "several menu options that guests can choose from at their expense." So guests will be paying for their own food at this wedding.

I've never been to a wedding where the food wasn't provided before (but then again, I haven't been to many weddings) and I live in Canada. What is customary where you live with regards to receptions, and gift- giving?

My mom always told me that as a guest, you should give a gift (or money) that is of similar value to the meal that you will be receiving. But I'm not sure if this is old-fashioned/out-dated or not.

I don't have a problem paying for my food for this wedding, it won't affect whether I'm able to attend or not. Just curious how it usually works.

Status: Offline
Old Sep 12th, 2015, 05:33 AM   2
Pregnant (Expecting)
Chat Happy BnB Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: East London
Posts: 2,306
I grew up in Canada and now live (and was married) in the UK.
I have been to many weddings at home and NEVER paid for a meal, usually always give a gift or money to the value of roughly what the meal cost.
All weddings I have been to in Canada have always had a meal choice card included in the invite, you tick off what you want and send it back with your rsvp.

At our wedding and all the weddings I have been to in the UK there is a meat option and a veggie option, everyone gets the meat option unless a person has specifically asked for a veggie (or vegan, any dietary requirement really)

Status: Offline
Old Sep 13th, 2015, 19:09 PM   3
Pregnant (Expecting)
Active BnB Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 131
Wow! I have never heard of having to pay for your own meal at a wedding. To me (an American) that sounds really rude! If you are throwing a party and you expect people to come, especially bringing gifts, then you provide the food, drinks, entertainment!
At my wedding, and every wedding except one that that I've been to, the food was provided in a buffet style, where every one comes and makes their own plate, however it is all paid for and you can have seconds or even thirds. At a more formal wedding I went to, we told them what meal option we wanted when we returned the RSVP card, but it was still paid for by the host. And alcohol too!

Status: Offline
Old Sep 14th, 2015, 14:20 PM   4
Mum (Mom)
Chat Happy BnB Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: UK, Wales
Posts: 2,396
Never ever have i heard of a wedding function where the guests would have to pay for their own food.
I live in the uk but have been to many asian muslim weddings where the food has always been paid for and you can have thirds even 'fourths'!

Status: Offline
Old Oct 3rd, 2015, 02:00 AM   5
Mum (Mom)
BnB Spammer Elite
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: North East England
Posts: 25,477
Iv never been invited to a wedding where you have to pay for your own food. Alcohol yes but not food. Gift wise it's just usually what you can afford.

Status: Offline
Old Oct 5th, 2015, 23:58 PM   6
Mum (Mom)
BnB Spammer Elite
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 26,039
I went to one wedding where I had to pay for the meal. I'm in Canada as well

But this was a very low budget wedding (not judging! The bride and groom did what they felt they needed to do!) so there wasn't a venue to have dinner at per se, they got married and then afterwards we ate dinner (which we paid for) at a local casino. There was no hall rented, no dancing, etc.

So in that instance, I get that we paid for our meal. If I was going to a wedding at a venue where there was the normal dinner, dancing, cake cutting etc then I'd be very surprised to have to pay for my own meal.

Status: Offline