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Old Nov 14th, 2010, 10:57 AM   11
Nic1107
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Hi Nimyra & Mercy2!

I've had good experience with TriCare, but only after we switched to Standard. Under Prime, we had a nightmare of a time trying to get appointments on base; McCoy was really close to our house but they were too small and overcrowded, and didn't have the cardiologist I needed to see. They sent us to Portsmouth but it was far away and DH couldn't get out of work for the appointments available. No one told us about the free rides either. So, since I was already in third tri and hadn't seen a doctor yet, I just said "screw it" and switched to Standard so I could see a civilian doctor. BUT the amazing thing about Standard is that maternity care is almost 100% covered! I only paid $700 for all my pregnancy care, and that is only because I needed to have a heart scan which wasn't covered. But for just maternity, everything is taken care of. As soon as Carmen was born, we enrolled her in DEERS and her care (at a civilian pediatrician of our choice) was also fully covered except for a very small co-pay.



 
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Old Nov 14th, 2010, 11:09 AM   12
Nimyra
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I didn't know Tricare standard covered so much, that's great to know in case we move to an area that doesn't have a good alternative plan!



 
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Old Nov 17th, 2010, 10:11 AM   13
Justagirlxx
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Hey ladies How is everyone doing today??? I'm a bit worried because another military mom on here just told me that I may be forced to move down to GA during DHs AIT because it's longer than 18 weeks... (its 24 weeks to be exact) and that they would take away our BAH if I don't move if they provide me housing down there. Do any of you have any experience with this? Were your husbands AITs long and did you have to move with them during it? I was planning on staying up here to finish my own education since I only have 1 semester left before I get my bachelors degree. x



 
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Old Nov 17th, 2010, 14:05 PM   14
Natalie Flynn
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Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: UK
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Name: Natalie
Military Branch: British Army
How long he's been in: Almost 5 years
Currently Deployed?: Nope he doesn't deploy with the unit he is currently at
How long you've been together: 3 years
How do you like the Military Life?: I hate it to be honest but I suppose it has its perks aswell.

Hii x



 
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Old Nov 17th, 2010, 14:14 PM   15
Nimyra
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Justagirl,

I don't know the answer to your question, but... what if they aren't providing housing in GA... maybe your OH could rent a cheap room somewhere and his BAH could cover your housing in Connecticut?

Is that an option?

I think you should definitely stay put and finish your degree since you are so close, even if it costs more money.

good luck!



 
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Old Nov 21st, 2010, 11:56 AM   16
Dolly.
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Hi, can i join in?

Name: Hannah
Military Branch: Royal Air Force
How long he's been in: just over 2 years
Currently Deployed?: Yes, but only 3 weeks in california
How long you've been together: nearly 9 years
How do you like the Military Life?: I enjoy it so far, but hubby hasn't been away for longer than 3 weeks yet. I love my married quarters, like the idea of moving around and seeing different places, love the uniform job security is good for hubby



 
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Old Nov 21st, 2010, 12:21 PM   17
Justagirlxx
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Hey Hannah! Thanks for replying! I'm hoping more and more of us find this group!

Sometimes I don't know how you ladies do it. At night when my husbands gone and still at work I wonder how I'll be able to make it. I picture him not coming home for months and it makes me so sad. My cat got hit by a car 2 nights ago and I can't help but imagine how horrible that would have been if he hadn't been here. Who would have held me while I cried? Who would have gone and gotten her body from the road and helped bme bury her? Who would have told me everything's going to be okay and she's in a better place now? All these things go through my mind on a daily basis. I know someday he won't be there when I really need him, and I'll have to somehow do it on my own, and pick myself back up from something absolutely devastating, by myself.

At night it seems like it's the worst, after JJ goes to sleep, I am so lonely, and feel very very alone. He works all the time now and I barely see him as it is. 2 months before he leaves. Hope I can make it through all those lonely nights somehow.



 
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Old Nov 21st, 2010, 12:31 PM   18
Nimyra
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Justagirl, *hugs*

A few thoughts... 1) its always hardest when they first leave. I bawled my eyes out for days and was so depressed it was hard to get out of bed for a couple of weeks. and then 2) it gets better. I don't know if you just get used to it, or what, but you do. then 3) you become more independent. you have to, and you will. and 4) you'll be surprised how much people are willing to help. My neighbors give me a hand with heavy lifting and emergency child care. I have a lovely lady who helps me clean (I pay her) and another guy who takes care of my yard (pay him too). One nice thing about the crap economy is its pretty easy to find people who want to make a little extra cash and are willing to do odd jobs for very cheap. I also have a nanny I use sometimes when I need a break from my LO, but she's not cheap.

It's good to be proactive with asking for help though. Tell your friends and family that you are going to need a little extra support. I spend a lot more time with my Dad since my husband left. I go out to his place for weekends sometimes just to have some company and help with Maya. I also reached out to my church for some support and they connected me with some (free) pastoral counselors who I could call when I was feeling blue. During the early months of the deployment this was a godsend.

So, reach out for help. People *want* to help.

It helps me to remind myself of all the ways my husband and I are fortunate. Yes, it sucks that we have to be apart, but we are building our future together. We have a house and a beautiful daughter. We have kind friends and neighbors. We have enough money. We have each other (even at a distance). Really, we are so fortunate.

Also, it helps not to look too far into the future. 12 months feels like forever, that's too long. We just focus on today. One day at a time.



 
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Old Nov 21st, 2010, 12:54 PM   19
Dolly.
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I know, I'm not looking forward to the lonely months either but ive made a few friends here and close to my neighbour and know we can call on each other whenever.
My hubby went away when I was 16-19 weeks pregnant and he missed our very first 1 year anniversary whiched sucked big time! just a sacrifice we have to make eh



 
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Old Nov 28th, 2010, 13:16 PM   20
cleckner04
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Just found this group.
Name: Samantha
Military Branch: US Navy
How long he's been in: 8 Years in January
Currently Deployed?: He leaves Tuesday for 7 months.
How long you've been together: 9 Years on New Years Eve Married for a little over 6 years.
How do you like the Military Life?: Hate it TBH. I'm not a typical 'proud' wife. We've seen and done far too much at this point and know how corrupt it all can be. But we are pushing through and dealing with it. You'll never see me walking around with navy affiliated clothes or house items, etc. Some wives are really over the top with it all.


So DH leaves Tuesday. We aren't prepared at all. He wrecked my car a week ago and totaled it. So right before he leaves and now I don't have a good car. But I have my Jeep that I've had since high school so it will get me by although it isn't nearly as safe as my 5 star crash rated brand new car. I just worry with Emma. This will be my first full deployment since Emma has came into the picture. We did the whole 3 month homeport change early this year, but that is nothing. This will be my 4th long deployment without him though. But I know it will be completely different with Emma to care for. She can be a major handful at times. But at the same time, I think her keeping me busy will help the time fly by.

Coincidentally, Nic and my husband were on the same ship before her DH got out of the navy.



 
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