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Old Nov 13th, 2010, 12:57 PM   1
Justagirlxx
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Military Wives/Fiances/Girlfriends Support Group




Hey Ladies! I know there is already a group on here for Military Wives but it seems as though it has died unfortunately I'd really love to start up a new group for all of us that are still here and looking for support! I am a newbie, my husband just joined the US Army and is leaving for BCT in January. I'm so new to this and am scared/anxious/excited and would love to find other women who are going through the same thing or have been through this.

I would love to hear any advice you all have for a newbie just getting started in the Army lifestyle. Any poems/songs/prayers and anything else that you can think of that help you get through please post them!

Tell me a little about yourselves so we can all get to know each other!

Name:
Military Branch:
How long he's been in:
Currently Deployed?:
How long you've been together:
How do you like the Military Life?:


I've placed a link to this thread in my Siggy hoping to find some of you!



 
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Old Nov 13th, 2010, 13:00 PM   2
Justagirlxx
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Name: Kim
Military Branch: Army
How long he's been in: Just signed!
Currently Deployed?: Not yet, leaving for BCT in Jan
How long you've been together: Almost 3 years, married for 2 weeks
How do you like the Military Life?: Not sure yet, doesn't seem real that he's even leaving



 
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Old Nov 13th, 2010, 13:06 PM   3
Nic1107
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Hi!
My husband just recently got out of the Navy, but he was in when we met, when we got married, and sadly he was out to sea when our baby girl was born. It wasn't until she was 3 months old that they even met!
Even though we're no longer military, I hope I can offer some support regarding military lifestyle, pregnancy/birthing/raising a child without your partner home, and readjusting back to civilian life in future.

Name: Nic
Military Branch: Navy
How long he's been in: Just got out after 4 years
Currently Deployed?: Not anymore!
How long you've been together: Nearly 4 years, married for 1.5 years.
How do you like the Military Life?: I loved some aspects of it; living in a new place, the consistent paychecks & BAH, the pride I felt watching my handsome hubby leave for work in his uniform. Other aspects I hated- the uncertainty, the loneliness, the fact that our lives were so controlled by the military in so many ways.




 
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Old Nov 13th, 2010, 13:17 PM   4
Justagirlxx
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Hey Nic! Thanks so much for replying! It's definitely great to hear stories from women who have been through this and made it out alive and for the better! Our plan right now is for my husband to do his 4 years, get his IT training and experience and then for him to get a civilian job when his 4 years is up. We decided the military would be a great choice for our family because of the excellent training and benefits they receive. Right now as its stands my husband would never be able to complete his education due to the fact that we had a child and we need him to work full time in order to support ourselves and stay afloat. But with the Army he can get his education and get a great job when he gets out. I am very excited about this! But also scared at the same time. Military families make such a huge sacrifice- I can only imagine how hard it will be in the coming years. How is your life now that your husband is out? I can not imagine my husband being gone when our baby was born, you are such a strong woman for doing it on your own! I only hope someday I can be that strong. I want to have a second child but I know that before we ttc #2 I need to be prepared that he will not be here for the birth and that I could possibly be doing it all alone.



 
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Old Nov 13th, 2010, 13:34 PM   5
Nic1107
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Honestly, it's more difficult now that he's out, only because the job economy is so terrible and we're struggling as he's just got made redundant. But now, for that reason among others, is a great time for your OH to join up. The new GI Bill is fantastic too; when he gets out, they'll continue to pay BAH while your OH goes back to school if he so desires. After a while, it becomes second nature to organize your life around the military, and though the times when he's away will be difficult, it's always worth it when he finally comes home and you're in each other's arms again. One of the things that they don't tell you enough is that there are a lot of programs available to aid spouses and children while the servicemember is away- support groups, child care, counselors to help you find housing and medical care, even transportation to doctor's appointments and such if you don't have a vehicle (I don't). Good luck hun, it'll not be the easiest road but it can be a lot of fun and a great way to start you on the way of a great, secure future. I wish you and your family the best and I'm always here if you need to talk!



 
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Old Nov 13th, 2010, 14:23 PM   6
Justagirlxx
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Thanks so much hun... yes this economy is a huge reason why he joined...its an extremely tough job market out there right now and because of that its almost impossible to get a well paying job without an education/experience. I'm really hoping it will be better in 4 years when he's finally out. Thanks so much for the encouragement... that is really cool to hear that they will still pay BAH while he's in school! Thats awesome actually!



 
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Old Nov 13th, 2010, 14:44 PM   7
Mercy2
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Hi there x Can I join in? x

Name: Nikki

Military Branch: British Army

How long he's been in: 10 and a half yrs

Currently Deployed?: No, but due to start training for the next deployment to Afghanistan very soon

How long you've been together: 5yrs

How do you like the Military Life?: Well. Sometimes I think its pretty good, esp knowing that he has a much higher level of job security given the current financial climate, but there are far more times when I find myself hating the lifestyle being a military wife entails! I often feel like I never see him, he is always away doing something or other and has just returned from a 6week training deployment to Kenya, and has missed so so much in the few short weeks since our DD was born!

I do love the sence of community between the wives who live on our base tho. I dont think I could cope without the friends I have made here!



 
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Old Nov 13th, 2010, 18:14 PM   8
Nimyra
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Name: Emily
Military Branch: US Army
How long he's been in: forever (nearly 20 years)
Currently Deployed?: yes.
How long you've been together: together 4 years, married 1.5 years
How do you like the Military Life?: I like it, but we're not really a typical military couple. We don't live on base, my husband isn't part of a normal unit, etc. I love that my husband loves what he does. That's the most important thing for me - that he's happy and fulfilled. I love knowing that he makes a difference. The retirement benefits are also fantastic.

That said, I haven't had a lot of support with my husband going away. Those free rides to dr's appointments would have been helpful. I had to pull teeth to get some folks at a nearby Fort to give me some assistance. Had my DH been part of a normal unit with a family readiness group things would have been different though.

I am really proud of my husband and I'm proud of myself for handling his deployment as well as I have. I think us military spouses and significant others are really strong!



 
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Old Nov 14th, 2010, 09:30 AM   9
Justagirlxx
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Yayyy Hey ladies! So glad you replied! I really love BnB and so glad to see there are other military mommies out there! (Not like I'm really official yet)

Do you ladies think it'd be OTT if I got a "Proud Army Wife" bumper sticker for my car? Lol I'm just so proud of him and want everyone to know! I have seen a few deployment bumper stickers and I don't think I'd ever get one. I dont think I'd want to be shouting out to the world that my husbands gone and I'm home alone all the time yano? But I'd love to get one that shows how proud I am of him!

Nikki - I'm glad to here there's support and a feeling of community at the base you're at. It's hard for me to imagine moving away from all of my family and friends and on top of that having my DH deploy. I'd be completely and utterly alone and that thought scares me. I'm really hoping to meet friends on whatever base we get stationed at.

Emily - That sucks you aren't getting the support you need. Why would they treat you any differently just because your husband isn't in a typical unit? Thats so not cool. I had another questions....I've actually heard a lot of bad things about Tricare (for you UK ladies this is the US Military's healthcare) ... how is the health insurance? Is it good or is it a huge pain to get things covered?



 
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Old Nov 14th, 2010, 09:40 AM   10
Nimyra
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It's not on purpose, its just... an issue of me falling through the cracks. After I showed up to Army Community Service in tears one of the social workers on site got me hooked up to some programs. They mean well, but it *is* a big bureaucracy after all.

I think a sticker would be great! I want to get one of those "Go Army" ones with the star. I like those.

I've heard mixed things about tricare depending on what MTF you are near. Where I live there is a tricare prime alternative plan for military families that uses civilian doctors and it is FANTASTIC... so its worth seeing if there is one in your area (just ask at the tricare office). I've been very happy with my health benefits.



 
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