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Old Jul 10th, 2016, 17:34 PM   11
britt0285
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I think fear and regret are very normal reactions, because I felt this also. Because it is also in my nature to assume the worse outcome. It is a terrible feeling to always be dreading, or waiting for the next thing to drop. The numb feeling is probably shock. I know when they were telling me something could be wrong I was just completely zone out and I just kept thinking, "please stop talking". I think counseling is always a good idea, for everyone. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts. I hope you are able to get some peace. I am sorry you have to wait the full two weeks.



 
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Old Jul 10th, 2016, 19:47 PM   12
MoBaby
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I'm sorry you have to wait such a long time for results. Wonder why they won't do fish with final results pending.
I think how you are feeling is completely normal in a way. If you detach from something then you can't be upset if you have to make a decision is how I'm seeing it. But if you've had a pretty bad life otherwise and never really dealt with it I think the counseler is a good idea. He/she can help you sort through some of the emotional issues underlying. Use your husband for emotional support. Don't be afraid to let your guard up and tell him how terrified you are. Cry if you need to. He is supposed to be there for you and I'm sure he will be. Remember he is fighting this too. He is terrified as well. His baby is affected just as much as your baby is. You guys need each other. It's terrifying to be in your situation. It really is. I didn't tell my coworkers (except the few who had to know right away as I work in radiation) until after 14 weeks, until after the harmony test came back. And still then I was terrified something was wrong or would go wrong. It's hard not to be in control. I totally get it. Pregnancy is the scariest thing I've ever done in my life. But it's also the best thing I've ever done. I have 36 days left and can't wait for it to be over. We are all here to support you the best we can. I know we aren't around physically but we can talk whenever you need to.



 
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Old Jul 11th, 2016, 02:42 AM   13
Septie
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Can't you insist on FISH to get preliminary relief or confirmation of some of the major concerns? If you pay for it yourself? A 20% of a chromosomal issue is quite large, so it is not surprising that you have detached from this pregnancy.
On the other hand, some heart defects are actually not such doom and gloom and can be fixed relatively easily (and remember, even a baby that looks perfectly healthy in utero can still have some things wrong, or get sick later in life, so don't outright doom the baby for some fixable issues that are not a major concern for his/her or your quality of life). If the cvs comes back clean, they can probably even give you an early scan to check for some major heart defects at 16 weeks or so, and then check for the more minor ones at the 20 week scan plus echo.



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Old Jul 11th, 2016, 05:44 AM   14
shellshocked
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I think there are plenty of women who would react as you have. Often it is a protective mechanism. Distancing yourself and your unborn child from heartache, pain and sadness. Sometimes you just have to be brutal in your feelings and you're entitled to them. I would never judge in this situation. Life is hard enough without knowingly bringing a life into this world that would be in pain or have life limiting conditions. Nobody wants their child to suffer or to have a serious medical condition often people who have babies with genetic issues didn't know of them before hand and love them regardless and adjust their lives and feelings to do the best that they can. However, as others have suggested I really would wait for more conclusive test results. The screening tests only give a risk they cannot tell whether there is an abnormality or not. Whatever your outcome or your decision I would probably talk through my feelings with a counsellor, even if its just that they tell you everything you are feeling is normal. I hope the next few weeks pass quickly. Pregnancy is full of so many unknowns it really is a stressful time, I hope you get the results that you hope for.



 
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Old Jul 12th, 2016, 11:21 AM   15
tag74
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You can get an amnio at 15 weeks now. I did with my son who I lost to Trisomy 18. I received my FISH results within 24 hours and then sadly had to terminate a week later due to Full T18. I would do the Amnio over the CVS - it's more accurate and less risky.



 
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Old Jul 12th, 2016, 13:31 PM   16
cnote
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Thanks everyone for your responses, thoughtful comments and advice. I had the CVS this morning. It was not as bad as I had envisioned. I read some major horror stories online about the pain, pressure, etc. but it was sort of meh. Not quite as simple as a blood draw, but not as bad as a shot. Anyway, the NT was the same, 3.7 - no change, but the doc who performed the procedure said we should try and remain optimistic because most of the time things are okay. So now we wait to see what happens. At least now if we get bad news in 2 weeks, we can terminate knowing it truly was the right choice. Will keep everyone posted.



 
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Old Jul 12th, 2016, 14:47 PM   17
MoBaby
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Will keep everything crossed all is okay!!



 
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Old Jul 12th, 2016, 15:40 PM   18
Cowgirl07
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I hope all is okay!



 
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Old Jul 12th, 2016, 15:52 PM   19
tag74
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FX!



 
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Old Jul 20th, 2016, 16:04 PM   20
MoBaby
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Hope your doing okay!! Been thinking about you. Not much longer to wait



 
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