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Old Jul 8th, 2016, 11:21 AM   1
cnote
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Increased NT


I had my 12 week scan on Wednesday and my husband and I were told the baby had a 3.5 -3.7 NT. My bloods were fine, but I guess based on my age (almost 34) they gave us a 20% chance of chromosomal abnormalities and a 10% chance of a heart defect. Upon further research online, I've discovered that some studies have shown the risk to be even higher than this. I have a CVS scheduled for next Tuesday, but I would like to just terminate regardless. I do not want a baby with a lifelong disorder of any kind. I do not think my baby is "special"; I think it's a product of biology and if I have the ability to prevent pain and suffering, I should. Call me cold-hearted, but that's just who I am - or rather what I've become after a life of personal challenges. However, my husband wants to wait for testing results. We are newlyweds and I'm afraid to rock the marriage by insisting upon termination. I just don't really know what to do.



 
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Old Jul 8th, 2016, 13:37 PM   2
Willow01
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Is it just heart breaking when this happens. I will not judge you in any way I promise, I was in a similar situation to you last year. My NT level came back high (3) and correlating that along with my age (35) I was given a 1-300 chance of my baby having DS. We had already discussed before I fell pregnant that we felt it best to not carry on with the pregnancy if we were ever told this news. Everyone kept telling me this was still good odds and it would be ok but I just didn't want to take the chance so paid £500 for the Harmony test. It gives you a 99.5% result to tell whether your baby has a deformality or not, have you heard of this? Could you look into it or other similar tests, nifty for example? After 12 weeks your babies blood begins to mix with yours and so these tests split your blood from babies and from there can tell exactly what is happening. This also removes the need for the CVS which is invasive and carries its own risks. I hope you read this and have a chat to your partner about possibly taking one of these tests so you know for sure. My results took 9 days to come back, longest 9 days ever but I knew for sure what was going on and could relax. Please don't feel bad about how you are feeling either, as I said I felt the same way too and if it wasn't for these tests I wouldn't have my 8 month old lying beside me now. Please feel free to pm me if you want someone to chat to about thisx



 
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Old Jul 8th, 2016, 15:28 PM   3
cnote
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Hi Willow, thanks for your reply and for being so non-judgmental. We were given the option for the blood test (non-invasive) but we were advised toward the CVS test because our risk is so high they want to be able to examine the actual chromosomes and provide a definitive answer. I'm seriously just spent though; I feel like I can't deal with this. Even if test results come back negative, then I have to wait until 20 weeks to check the heart and other organs. So at 20 weeks I might still need to terminate. I would honestly rather terminate now, wait a few months, and try again. Why risk having to terminate a baby at 15-20 weeks? It's like saying, there's a 30% risk if I get on that plane that it will crash today. Would I do it? Hell no! How is this different?

I do worry that I would regret it though, and wonder if everything would have been okay. I don't know, I just want to go back in time and have my hubby put on a condom. I know I sound cold, but I'm not afraid of real talk.



 
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Old Jul 9th, 2016, 04:39 AM   4
Willow01
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I personally think I would want to do the same and terminate now rather than at 20 weeks. It's so different for you than your husband, the baby is growing inside you and say you have to wait until 20 weeks by then you will be feeling flutters, maybe movements and it will be so hard not to try to fall in love with the baby just incase you have to terminate. This is such a hard decision. If you do terminate now there will always be the what if question in your mind but I think the way I would deal with that is to just keep thinking there was something wrong and that it is for the best, if you think the other way you will always beat yourself up. Is it worthwhile trying to sit your partner down again and have another chat about this? I understand your fear of rocking the marriage but it sounds like he isn't fully understanding your concerns, it must be hard for him too though but it sounds like he is hoping in his mind it will be ok after the tests but is he thinking ahead to 20 weeks and what could happen then? This is such a hard situation for you, I am thinking of youx



 
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Old Jul 9th, 2016, 10:53 AM   5
cnote
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Thanks Willow...I spoke with a genetic counselor yesterday (one from the hospital I go to) and she said my chances are not all that bad, and that she's seen a lot of good outcomes from babies with similar NT measurements. She strongly advised me to do the CVS and wait for test results before terminating. To respect my husband's wishes, I will do that, but I don't have high hopes. In the pit of my stomach, something always felt off about this pregnancy. My husband is alarmed because he says I have no regard for human life and it seems like I don't love the baby, but it's not that at all. I just tend to see things in black and white and if something isn't working, I don't like to drag it out....but I do worry maybe I'm not cut out to be a mom if I think like this. But I would do anything for the people I love, I would die for them. But I guess I don't love something I never got to know, or something that only causes me misery. Anyway Willow, thanks for the support. Have a great weekend.



 
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Old Jul 9th, 2016, 12:38 PM   6
britt0285
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Hi Cnote,

I'm sorry you are going through this my husband and I had a similar experience just over the past two weeks. Our NT measurement varied from 2.6mm - 3.1mm. I'm 31 and my OB didnt even do the Quad screening this time, which Im a little confused about because I dont remember turning it down. I had the progenity (similar to the maternity21, etc). It was agonizing because I also was not sure what the best option would be if something was wrong. I have a terrible genetic disorder in my family and I would not want to bring someone into this world only to suffer. I don't think that's fair either. But I think your chances are really good.



 
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Old Jul 9th, 2016, 13:50 PM   7
cnote
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Thanks for the positive thoughts, Britt. I don't know if you're in the U.S., but at my hospital here in California (Kaiser), your NT measurements are considered normal. In fact, we were told that had our NT measurement been below 3.5, our risk level would have gone down dramatically. So being on the "cusp" so to speak makes us feel a little more hopeful. But I'm no fool and won't let hope make me delusional. I'm sorry you're going through this as well, but hopefully it will make you feel better to know that my doctor would have considered your scan normal. Maybe it ranges from country to country, state to state. I understand the worry though. Any chance of the baby being abnormal is shocking. It's just one of those things that feels so f**ked up and unfair. Especially if you're healthy and the odds of it happening are so slim to start with.

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you, but I think you will find yourself feeling much better after you get your results.



 
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Old Jul 9th, 2016, 18:18 PM   8
britt0285
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I am in Texas actually. And I did read that it varies from hospital to hospital. I have already gotten my results back and they were negative and we found out we are having a little boy. I would do the blood test its an awful, sucky wait but I feel a lot better now. Sorry I missed the part about the CVS. It should give you closure on whatever decision you make. I also read an opinion a cardiologist had written regarding this measurement saying, it was hard to be exact because you are measuring fluid with sound waves. Also depending on how the baby's neck is postured it can effect the measurement, and a millimeter is so small. Take care of yourself.



 
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Old Jul 9th, 2016, 20:06 PM   9
MoBaby
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I'm the same age as you. 34 this week actually. We were given a 1:18 chance for downs after my NT scan and bloodwork. The measurement was 2.97-3.1mm and the cut off was 3mm where I'm at. But my bloodwork was off, my hcg levels were super high for gestation. My Ob was on the fence as to if we would have abnormal results and she said that women in my shoes do sometimes choose to terminate. I chose to do the harmony and if it was abnormal I would do the aminocentesis. I've gone through countless rounds of ivf and miscarriage after miscarriage so I actually valued my pregnancy from the point of knowing I was pregnant. There was no way i was going to terminate unless something completely and horrible was wrong. There is a living being inside you. It is something special to be valued. But I guess if you've never struggled to conceive and it's easy to get pregnant and you've never suffered the heart ache of a loss you would feel the way you do. Not being judge mental at all because I would not want to have a child with a serious medical condition and one that would have a poor quality of life. We did a fetal echo at 19 weeks and it was completely normal. I spent countless hours of research, reading journal after journal and I had assumed the worse. But everything came back normal and has continued to be normal and there is nothing wrong with the baby. I think you should wait for the results of the cvs before making any decisions. I don't think it's fair to the baby to just terminate based on some stupid screening tests that has a high false positive rate. I think it would rock your marriage for sure because your husband seems as he is in love with this baby already and is wanting to keep it until you know. If the cvs is normal and you're still not convinced you can do an amino at 14 weeks I believe. And if that is normal you can be assured genetically the baby is fine. Most cardiac defects come with a much much higher nt measurement than yours. I think you need to have a long discussion with your husband. I wouldn't let some dumb screening test make you think something is wrong because you don't know. It's a screening test only. Please get more conclusive results before terminating this baby's life. The baby is more than likely completely normal. You should get results the day after the cvs so it won't cause much of a delay in things. I'm sorry you're going through this.



 
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Old Jul 10th, 2016, 13:40 PM   10
cnote
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Thanks MoBabyfor your suggestions, you make totally reasonable points. We have the CVS scheduled for Tuesday, and we're going to wait for results from there. Unfortunately, we have to wait 2 weeks because my hospital doesn't do FISH. I think that's what's hardest about this right now...I haven't told my employer or any friends about the pregnancy because I was waiting for the 12 week scan and now I have to go on hiding it longer. I'm starting to show a little as well so it's getting a bit awkward walking around at work, sucking in my stomach and trying to wear long sweaters in the California summer heat.

I think what disturbs me most of all is my reaction to this. I'm clearly messed up and have some sort of psychological issue, like maybe I'm a sociopath now or am so severely depressed I can't access empathy anymore. I just feel nothing but fear and regret for getting pregnant. Even after the 12 week ultrasound and seeing the baby move, I didn't feel anything but numb. I have gone through some horrid things in this life and never sought counseling since I figured it was all common sense crap anyhow, but I'm starting to realize I may have ptsd or something and it's causing me to detach severely from other people including the baby. Like the thought of anything being wrong with the baby just makes me want to wipe the slate clean and I know most mothers don't feel that way and it's unnatural. I have scheduled a session with a counselor next Thursday. If the results come back positive for a defect and we do terminate, I've decided I need to address this issue before we try again.



 
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