Both times I ended up with a c-section due to the babies being malpositioned and not descending into the pelvis (we now think there may be some unseen issue with my pelvis and I'll be having an elective next time). As I said, I got to the pushing stage with both of mine. With Kaya I was pushing for a good 45 mins before we decided to transfer (we live 20-30 mins from hospital) and it was all arranged in full consultation with me. The MW's called the ambulance and I walked (slowly!) to it. Then we drove to the hospital, they put on the blue light when we hit traffic. When we got there, I was assessed by the duty MW and the consultant and we went to theatre (about 20 mins after our arrival) for a trial of forceps. There was no panic and it was a good hour or so between transferring and Kaya's birth. The CMW stayed with us until we went to the theatre. I was sectioned for failure to progress
With Blythe, it was mostly the same. I asked to transfer before my waters went as I felt I needed more pain relief (was quite a quick labour), but my waters went before the ambulance arrived and I started pushing. We did get blue lights all the way this time, but as I was an HBAC I was being monitored every 10-15 mins so we knew baby was fine. After I arrived with OH and CMW it was much the same as last time, but Blythe's heartbeat started to dip and I had to go on my left. The doc decided to just go straight for the section, but there was no real sense of it being an emergency and the staff were joking with me (both times the anaesthetist was really nice lol).
DH was a little bit anxious at first about my wish for a home birth - mainly as he presumed it would be very messy!
He is now fully supportive and cant wait to meet our little one!
We've had a good look around the homebirth.org website and have started to put together our birth box - basically one of those plastic storage boxes that will keep all our birthing stuff together in one place for when its needed.
Items for our home birth box are:
2 plastic sheets
large flat sheet to go over the top (just for comfort really, was £2 in the sale in primark so dont care if it gets thrown away)
Maternity bed mats
microwaveable beanbag style hotwater bottle
towel for wrapping baby in
the big comfy t-shirt ive stole from DH that i want to wear in labour
bucket - cos I know i'll be sick at one point
Stuff for me for after i.e maternity towels, big spare pants LOL
I've been so excited this evening after seeing the midwife. I think it's tiring me out! haha
Rach, I've a box that I was going to do the same thing with, so that's a good reminder. I think I'm going to look at those dust sheets at B&Q but will otherwise just get a couple of cheap shower curtains. DH's nan said she'd post us some old sheets and towels down once I got the go ahead, so I need to let her know. I think I have everything else.
Oooh, you also reminded me that I need to edit my birth plan now. I'd done it with a view to going to the birth centre at the hospital. Would you (or anyone else reading the thread) mind posting your home birth plan for tips, etc.?
Ideally, if all goes smoothly, I would like for the midwives to generally remain in the background and not get involved in my labour unless I ask them to.
I would like to remain active and use whatever position I find comfortable.
Please encourage me to stay off my back – particularly for the second stage!
I would like to minimise internal examinations and, if possible, have them done in a position other than lying on my back.
I do not want my waters broken.
Monitoring of the baby’s heartbeat should be done as unobtrusively as possible and in whatever position I am in at the time.
If the baby appears to be poorly positioned or labour is not progressing well for some reason, I would like to try different positions and movements that might help.
I would like to have music playing during the labour, and I want to be in charge of the iPod.
I would like for the clocks in the house to be covered or removed as I do not want to be clock watching.
Only my mother, Laurie and my partner, Barry may be present during labour and birth. I do not want to be contacted by friends and family asking ‘is it out yet’. Mum or Barry can tell these people to ‘bugger off’.
I would like Entonox and Pethadine to be available. However I do not want them to offered unless I specifically ask for them.
I intend to use baths and a TENS Machine to aid me in pain management.
Please keep the room as quiet as possible during the second stage.
I do not want to be coached through the birth unless it seems as if I need some help, and if anyone calls me ‘mum’ instead of using my name I may hit them over the head with the gas and air!
I would like to give birth in my bedroom
I would like to give birth in an upright, kneeling, supported squatting or all-fours position to give the baby maximum space to descend through my pelvis. I do not want to be on my back or semi-reclining unless that position seems right for me on the day, having tried alternatives. If I am too tired to maintain an upright position then please encourage me to lie on my side instead of my back, to allow maximum mobility in my pelvis.
When my baby is born, please pass him or her straight to me.
Please only administer an episiotomy if the baby needs to be born quickly.
I would like the lights dimmed when my baby is born, and for the minimum amount of noise to be made.
I would not like mucus suctioned from the baby’s mouth and nose unless necessary.
Please do not announce the baby's sex as we would like to find out for ourselves.
I would like a physiological third stage with the cord clamped and cut when it stops pulsating. I wish no drugs to be used unless specifically indicated. It is important to me that you do not clamp the cord until it has stopped pulsating, unless you need to take emergency steps which preclude this. **Please do not pull on the cord or use fundal pressure unless there is a specific indication to do so, as I have read that this is contra-indicated in drug-free third stages**.
I would like my midwife to set up her resuscitation equipment as close as possible to the place where I give birth, so that if my baby needs resuscitation, this can be done with the cord still attached - thus giving her the benefit of all the oxygenated blood which is transfused from the placenta to the baby when the cord pulsates.
Please offer my partner the opportunity to cut the cord if possible.
We do not wish to keep the placenta
Care of the baby:
I would like to breastfeed my baby as soon as possible after the birth
I would like to keep the baby unclothed and close to my skin immediately after birth, to maximise skin-to-skin contact
I would prefer that my baby is not given an injection of Vitamin K, but would like him/her to have oral Vitamin K instead.
In case of transfer to hospital:
I do not wish to be transferred to hospital unless my or the baby’s health are at risk.
If transfer by ambulance becomes necessary, please do not strap me in on my back - I would prefer to be on my side, to make contractions easier to deal with.
I agree to student doctors being present during my treatment
I am very keen to avoid a caesarean section if it is at all possible, as I do not want to enter future labours with a scarred uterus. I particularly would like to avoid a caesarean just for slow progress. If labour is simply taking a long time but my baby is not in immediate danger, please would you encourage me to keep going and perhaps to try changes of position or movements which might help. Please do not offer a caesarean unless my baby is in danger.
If a caesarean section becomes necessary, I would prefer to remain awake with epidural or spinal block anaesthesia. I would like my partner to stay with me at all times, and would like to breastfeed the baby as soon after birth as possible.
If there are problems after the birth:
If I suffer a severe post-partum haemorrhage, please do not perform a hysterectomy unless it is the only available course of action.
Please do not admit my baby to Special Care simply for observation, but only if there is a specific reason for concern.
Please do not give my baby supplements of glucose water or formula milk without my permission. I would expressly like to avoid having any formula supplements unless it is unavoidable, and certainly not in the first two days in any event.
Under no circumstances is my baby to be bottle-fed as this could lead to nipple confusion and hinder breastfeeding. If supplements are necessary, please give them by spoon or other method, not by bottle.
If I have trouble breastfeeding, I would greatly appreciate the help of a midwife who is fully supportive of breastfeeding, and would also like to be given contact details for local breastfeeding counsellors.
I would like to go home as soon after the birth as I am able to move, unless I or the baby have health problems which require hospital treatment.
Well I thought he was coming round to the home birth.....
If I'm honest a huge part of me has set my heart on this. Hubby has a few reservations but has agreed that we should explore it further. We see the mw to discuss it at my next check up.
I've been sending him links to info and videos on you tube. I've been careful to select positive stuff but tried to make sure its objective too. I've probably got a bit carried away as I do with most things I'm a kind of all or nothing type of girl....
He seemed to be really coming round to the idea....
Then we got talking about it again last night and he started getting het up about the girls being there and the dogs! Basically it all then comes spilling out that the more he learns the more nervous he becomes.
I want his support but not reluctantly. He's now said he doesnt want to discuss it with the MW and ultimately its me that has to give birth so he will do what ever makes me happy and support me......why is that a bad thing you ask.....because I feel like its not truly what he wants.
So do I just go ahead and think sod it and get planning.....do I say forget it and go with the perfectly acceptable alternative of the birth centre.....or what?! He's basically saying 'you're gonna get your own way so there's no point me putting up any resistance'.....I hate that.....it's not like us and we usually either agree or have a compromise on everything
Have you shown him the stuff written by fathers that have attended home births? Personally, I agree with him that it's you that has to give birth and that you need to do what makes you happy. I think that you'll find that he'll support you no matter what and that he'll wonder what all the fuss was about once he experiences a home birth.
I think that's what I need to do. I honestly thought, because of the way he is, that he'd want a fully objective and 'factual' type view. I've inadvertently made him more anxious. He is so not an ignorance is bliss type of man so I gave him the homebirth.org website and let him read the lot. He's now talking about prolapsed cords and all sorts that he was unaware of a week ago!
We see the MW a week on weds and ATM he's saying he doesnt need to discuss it with her and I should just plan it. I'll leave it for a few days and then a bit closer to the appointment I'll maybe dig out some good accounts from fathers. I'm know he'll come to the appointment if I ask him to.
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