Question for Moms-If you could go back in time and give yourself 1 piece of advice? - Page 4

Kage76 · Apr 7th, 2012, 09:23 AM

Another thing would be - let people help. If people want to clean your house, look after the LO for a couple of hours while you get rest, cook you food or do some shopping say yes! no one expects you to be supermum you dont have anything to prove. Pay it forward when someone you love has a baby.

M&S+Bump · Apr 8th, 2012, 16:22 PM

I would tell myself to trust my own body and make them listen to me - I knew everything wasn't right but people kept telling me what was happening was 'normal'. I was right, they were wrong, and if someone had listened to me to start with, it could all have turned out so different.

Also, while everyone tells you not to listen to horror stories, I disagree. I wish I had listened to more, the goriest ones I could find, then I might not have felt so cheated and like a total failure when it didn't turn out to be all kittens and rainbows like everyone had led me to believe. I wish I'd known just how bad it could get - then if it wasn't THAT bad it would have been a bonus. I'm a lot more prepared this time!

mamaduke · Apr 10th, 2012, 12:17 PM

There's a reason why it's called labor. At the end of it all, forget the "what if I had done" or beating up yourself thinking you could've done better. At the end of labor is a beautiful LO, and you should focus more on that then on things that could've/would've/should've been better.

DarlingGirl · Apr 10th, 2012, 13:20 PM

I would tell myself to look more into relaxation techniques and really practice breathing through contractions (as at my antenatal class I never really 'got' the breathing exercise for some reason!).

NuKe · Apr 10th, 2012, 16:44 PM

"don't get the fucking epidural!!!

citymouse · Apr 10th, 2012, 17:24 PM

Don't eat the McDonalds two cheeseburger meal!

I was induced and we expected it to take 24 hours. My doctor told DH to get me my favorite meal the first night, and three hours later I was in full-on labor. I'll never forget the look on my doctor's face when she heard what I'd eaten. (Of course it all came back up rather dramatically during contractions.)

My "definitely on the list for next time" is my Hypnobabies course. I ended up with an epidural, but thanks to Hypnobabies, my breath control was awesome and pushing was a breeze and a beautiful, pleasant process.

Jayneypops · Apr 11th, 2012, 06:46 AM

Well, since starting this thread Ive had my little girl!!

If I could go back and tell myself 1 thing it would be keep a VERY open mind!!!
I was dead set on a hypnobirthing, natural home water birth. Then at 40 + 2 Daisy decided to poop inside the womb so I had to be induced and ended up with an epidural.
I can honestly say though that I was very well looked after in hospital and wouldnt change how it went at all.

All the best laid plans ay!!?
xxxxx

hardworknmama · Apr 11th, 2012, 22:53 PM

My one piece of advice that I gave myself the second time around was to not have a plan. I can make all the birth plans I want but the baby has thier own birth plan which is most likely going to be very different than mine. Relax and enjoy the ride is really all you can do.

Congratulations on your little girl!

Bats11 · Apr 13th, 2012, 05:06 AM

Wish i had demanded the epidural, instead of letting the midwife talk me out of it.

bodi26 · Apr 13th, 2012, 16:34 PM

Congrats on your baby girl!

Although I had an elective section, I know for this time round that I'm "allowed" to be opinionated about how I'd like to give birth.

Throughout my first pregnancy, I was ignorant and didn't do any research a such, put my trust completely in the medical staff and didn't really think anything of it.

This time, I'm not being told that as an adult, I'm not "allowed" this or that - this is my pregnancy, my birth and my choice. I will take their professional advice and will make my own informed decision.

Although that doesn't mean I've got a birth plan and it has to go 100% that way because I know it won't but I'm not going to let myself be bullied into a certain labour/birth just because their "policy" says so.

Sorry it's long winded and not something I'd tell myself, but it is something I'm determined to do differently!

Apr 7th, 2012, 09:23 AM	#31
Kage76 Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: Melbourne, Australia Posts: 1,110	Another thing would be - let people help. If people want to clean your house, look after the LO for a couple of hours while you get rest, cook you food or do some shopping say yes! no one expects you to be supermum you dont have anything to prove. Pay it forward when someone you love has a baby.

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Apr 8th, 2012, 16:22 PM	#32
M&S+Bump Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Aug 2010 Posts: 2,080	I would tell myself to trust my own body and make them listen to me - I knew everything wasn't right but people kept telling me what was happening was 'normal'. I was right, they were wrong, and if someone had listened to me to start with, it could all have turned out so different. Also, while everyone tells you not to listen to horror stories, I disagree. I wish I had listened to more, the goriest ones I could find, then I might not have felt so cheated and like a total failure when it didn't turn out to be all kittens and rainbows like everyone had led me to believe. I wish I'd known just how bad it could get - then if it wasn't THAT bad it would have been a bonus. I'm a lot more prepared this time!

Status: Offline

Apr 10th, 2012, 12:17 PM	#33
mamaduke Mum (Mom) Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: Ohio, US Posts: 1,846	There's a reason why it's called labor. At the end of it all, forget the "what if I had done" or beating up yourself thinking you could've done better. At the end of labor is a beautiful LO, and you should focus more on that then on things that could've/would've/should've been better.

Status: Offline

Apr 10th, 2012, 13:20 PM	#34
DarlingGirl Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: May 2011 Location: UK Posts: 122	I would tell myself to look more into relaxation techniques and really practice breathing through contractions (as at my antenatal class I never really 'got' the breathing exercise for some reason!).

Status: Offline

Apr 10th, 2012, 16:44 PM	#35
NuKe Mum (Mom) BnB Elite Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: N. Ireland Posts: 13,888	"don't get the fucking epidural!!!

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Apr 10th, 2012, 17:24 PM	#36
citymouse Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Jun 2011 Posts: 3,916	Don't eat the McDonalds two cheeseburger meal! I was induced and we expected it to take 24 hours. My doctor told DH to get me my favorite meal the first night, and three hours later I was in full-on labor. I'll never forget the look on my doctor's face when she heard what I'd eaten. (Of course it all came back up rather dramatically during contractions.) My "definitely on the list for next time" is my Hypnobabies course. I ended up with an epidural, but thanks to Hypnobabies, my breath control was awesome and pushing was a breeze and a beautiful, pleasant process.

Status: Offline

Apr 11th, 2012, 06:46 AM	#37
Jayneypops Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Apr 2011 Location: Worcestershire, UK Posts: 543	Well, since starting this thread Ive had my little girl!! If I could go back and tell myself 1 thing it would be keep a VERY open mind!!! I was dead set on a hypnobirthing, natural home water birth. Then at 40 + 2 Daisy decided to poop inside the womb so I had to be induced and ended up with an epidural. I can honestly say though that I was very well looked after in hospital and wouldnt change how it went at all. All the best laid plans ay!!? xxxxx

Status: Offline

Apr 11th, 2012, 22:53 PM	#38
hardworknmama Other Chat Happy BnB Member Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: Kansas Posts: 1,582	My one piece of advice that I gave myself the second time around was to not have a plan. I can make all the birth plans I want but the baby has thier own birth plan which is most likely going to be very different than mine. Relax and enjoy the ride is really all you can do. Congratulations on your little girl!

Status: Offline

Apr 13th, 2012, 05:06 AM	#39
Bats11 Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Dec 2011 Posts: 920	Wish i had demanded the epidural, instead of letting the midwife talk me out of it.

Status: Offline

Apr 13th, 2012, 16:34 PM	#40
bodi26 Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Apr 2012 Location: UK Posts: 126	Congrats on your baby girl! Although I had an elective section, I know for this time round that I'm "allowed" to be opinionated about how I'd like to give birth. Throughout my first pregnancy, I was ignorant and didn't do any research a such, put my trust completely in the medical staff and didn't really think anything of it. This time, I'm not being told that as an adult, I'm not "allowed" this or that - this is my pregnancy, my birth and my choice. I will take their professional advice and will make my own informed decision. Although that doesn't mean I've got a birth plan and it has to go 100% that way because I know it won't but I'm not going to let myself be bullied into a certain labour/birth just because their "policy" says so. Sorry it's long winded and not something I'd tell myself, but it is something I'm determined to do differently!

Status: Offline

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