Hi everyone. I am not sure what to do, and would love any advice or thoughts. I am 39, actually soon to be 40 this month, yes I am old! I have 3 children ages 4, 7 and 10. I just had my 3rd miscarriage, not in a row...my pattern was child, miscarriage, child, miscarriage, child, and lastly another miscarriage. It took my husband and I much thought as to if we should try again and we did and became pregnant quickly, but then lost the baby at 6 weeks. That was so difficult. Had a d and c 3 weeks ago and still bleeding.....yes I know its crazy, my doctor says its okay up to 4 weeks. I also ended up with a UTI, a yeast infection and went to the ER for a high fever all after the D and C, so it has been quite an ordeal.
So, now I am so confused as what to do. Do we try again? I can't even imagine having to go through all this again, but with my age and history that is definitely a high possibility, right? I still have this feeling inside of me, of wanting another baby, is that crazy? I mean I have 3 beautiful healthy children, why should I push it? But then I think if I don't try again will I regret it? I am torn with so many emotions on what to do.
I have so many reasons not to try again....my age, my miscarriage history, having a 4th child will be harder on the others, less time with them and my husband, I also have a vaginal prolapse which most likely will worsen with another pregnancy and lastly finances are always a thought. BUT, with all that, I still would LOVE another child...oh why is this so hard. Oh, and lastly I think was this a message telling me just to stop??? Please help me with your thoughts....thanks so much!!!!
My opinion would be try again, as I understand that need for a baby that you describe. My pattern so far has been miscarriage, child, miscarriage, so I'm hoping that the next time will be sucessful. But I can't imagine wanting to stop having children until that feeling of needing to have another child subsides, as it really is an all consuming feeling. But only you can decide what's right for you - can you cope with another miscarriage if it was to happen, or not being able to get pregnant again because nature has decided that your time for children is over? If you think you can't, then maybe saving yourself the heartache of trying without success would be an idea.
Kayla 333, I would try again especially if it's what you want. I had my first daughter at 39, my second at 42 and just miscarried at 43. My OB is in full support of us trying again and we will as soon as we can.
Nobody can tell you whether or not to try again, your pattern suggests your next pregnancy may be carried fully? But you've got doubts about it, if you feel as though if it did happen again you couldn't cope then would you want to risk it..
I'm so sorry that your in this situation, do what you feel is best Hun. I hope either way it works out for you x
Hi. I had a m/c before my daughter was born and have now had another- both when I reached 12 weeks. I too am 39- 40 in a few months, and wondered whether to try again as wasn't sure I could face seeing that empty image on the screen again but have decided that we will as we really do want another for us and for our daughter to have a sibling. I think if it is something you want then go for it
I say try again Kayla! I am in a somewhat similar situation. I just turned 41, have an 11 & 10 year old and suffered my 1st miscarriage last month. The pregnancy was not planned. In fact, we haven't talked about expanding our family in a decade! However, once I got over the shock of the pregnancy DH and I were thilled... Until the loss. It was the hardest thing my husband and I have ever gone through. Now, we want to try again but I am SO SCARED that the deck is stacked against me having a successful pregnancy. Another loss would be heartbreaking but the idea of another baby to love is what is keeping me motivated to at least try for a few months and see where we are. Good luck to you whatever you decide!
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