Recurrent Miscarriage Thread

Hey ladies-
So today I ran in to my mother-in-law at a store and she had a "Gramma to be" shirt on. Both my sister-in-laws are pg, and I almost started crying. I feel so stupid, but I got angry seeing that shirt. My husband said she wears it all the time, and he said he refuses to comment on it. With our 2 pregnancys, they weren't ever talked about when the family was all together. They acted like I wasn't even pregnant! Ugh...sorry, just upset today. Keep telling myself only 5 days til my appt...

Kat, I'm angry too! WHAT??? How is it that your 2 pregnancies weren't acknowledged, but she wears a shirt for her other daughters-in-laws pregnancies? (Or are they her daughters?) It doesn't matter, that is just plain awful. I'm so sorry hon. That is incredibly upsetting. Only 5 more days babe. 5 more days. xoxo

Thanks heart...idk, I just don't get it. Maybe because my 1 sister in law had been trying for a few months, they didn't want to rub it in her face? Idk, but I was pretty upset. Its my husbands sister and his sister in law that are expecting. I keep thinking about how when I had my d&c and nat. Miscarriage how I didn't even get a card from either of them...makes me not want to give them presents and be happy for them, but I have to. I don't want to seem, and don't want to be, jealous and full of hate but sometimes it gets hard to stay level headed....thanks for letting me vent !!! How r things with you? Any appts or anything coming up?

Oh Kat that is awful. I am so sorry huni. I can't wait to hear how your appt goes. I am praying for you still

Vent away Kat. Recently I was thinking the same thing about getting a card. If someone had a death in the family, people would send cards. Why don't people send something for a mc? I was thinking if I ever have a friend who has one, I'm sending a card. I've never gotten one. I don't blame you for not wanting to get them a present. Vent away here hon, we understand.

AFM, I have my HSG on Monday. Can't wait to get it over with. Then we'll start trying again.

Dont blame you for feeling that Kat . I'd feel the same!

I'm still in limbo and getting fed up still bleeding but not passed anything other than blood and no cramping so sack still there. In all your experience how long does it normally take for a natural mc- I've been bleeding fresh red blood for about a week now? My other 3 mc were all missed so not sure what to expect xx

Thanks girls, it means a lot to have your support!

Heart- good luck with your appt. Hope all goes well!

Moon- my 1 st was a natural mc. I actually found out I was having a mc 2 days before my 1st appt. I didn't know, and still don't know, exacty how far along I was, but I was at least 8 weeks. Anyway, I spotted for a bout 4 days followed by heaving bleeding, blood clots, and after about a week, I passed the placenta and everything. It was painful. Uterine contractions, back pain, and the whole 9. I wanted a d&c but my doc at the time refused (I've since switched). So idk if that helps, but I think everyone is different. By the time my drs office agreed I should go to the er(idiots), the ultrasound revealed the placenta had collasped already. Did u chose nat. mc?

Oh and I do agree with card/ gift giving after mc. I always explain it to people that its a death that I only expeirence because no one else sat and cried with me for weeks and ached for that baby to be there still.

I read somewhere that a lady makes teady bears for women who mc/ lose a baby and takes them to the hospital. I thought that was wonderful, because not that its bringing a baby home obviously, but it shows someone recognizes your loss and you have something to hold and cry with. I've often thought of doing something simialr at our local hospital (which the nurses were outstanding before and after my d&c, even sharing personal stories). I just wouldn't know how to approach it.
Oh, and my gf that was preg with triplets had her babies at just 25 weeks ...so far I guess they are hanging in there, but it weighs heavy on my heart for her.

Thanks Kat- I'll wait a few more days and if I dont pass any clots or anything I'll get some advice. With my others I had erpc's -2 the second time because of retained products and last time I had the medical management but it was awful because I haemorrhaged and ended up having the erpc too - so thats why I hoped to do it naturally this time.

I was thinking about the cards/gifts thing- its funny really, the first mc I got several big bunches of flowers, the 2nd time I got a small bunch of flowers, last time someone baked me a cake which was nice- but this time people havent really got involved in whats going on at all so I must be getting boring for everyone now But to be fair I've tried to carry on as normal this time because I'm scared of getting depressed again so I havent gone off sick yet until it gets painful so people are probably just taking cues from me.

Oh reedsgirl- so happy for you! So exciting having twins!

Hi Kat vent away I know that feeling well
Moonmama with my natural miscarrige I spotted for about a week and then on about the 7th day started getting contraction like pains and then passed everything in one hit, well at least I think I did, my Dr was the same and said up until 9 weeks the body takes care of things itself.
AFM had another HCG test today and should hear by tomorrow so fx levels are going down, I really dont want to go through another D&C...