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Old Dec 3rd, 2017, 14:51 PM   1
xCookieDoughx
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About to come on my period and feeling so down about it :(


I lost my little boy at 19+5 on the 1st November and bled for 2 weeks. Pregnancy tests went back to negative once bleeding stopped and I had a positive ovulation test on the 26th November. And by temps I ovulated on the 27th. Which means at some point the end of this coming week AF will make her appearance and Iím not sure Iím totally ready for that

I have been tracking my ovulation, CM, Cervical position and BBT and all are heading in the right direction for AF.

Cervix low and firm, very watery CM, BBT started falling today. So AF is well and truly on her way

And I just donít feel ready yet. We want to start trying again in the new year but I feel like the bleeding will be a constant reminder of my now empty womb!



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Old Dec 4th, 2017, 05:07 AM   2
loves_cookies
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I'm sorry lovely, I don't really know what to say but I don't want to read and run. I'm in a similar position, I had my son on the 8th November at 19+4.

I remember your exact feelings from my first loss though, every month it felt like a slap in the face that I wasn't pregnant anymore. I'm not tracking my cycle but at the moment I actually want AF. I know i'll be upset when it arrives though. Like you I plan to TTC in the New Year once we've had the results from investigations, so I'm trying to view AF as a pathway to starting TTC again.

This path we're being made to walk is beyond horrid and filled with reminders of what we've lost. There's nothing I can say it make you feel any better but I'm here to chat if you'd like to.



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Old Dec 5th, 2017, 08:26 AM   3
xCookieDoughx
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Quote:
Originally Posted by loves_cookies View Post
I'm sorry lovely, I don't really know what to say but I don't want to read and run. I'm in a similar position, I had my son on the 8th November at 19+4.

I remember your exact feelings from my first loss though, every month it felt like a slap in the face that I wasn't pregnant anymore. I'm not tracking my cycle but at the moment I actually want AF. I know i'll be upset when it arrives though. Like you I plan to TTC in the New Year once we've had the results from investigations, so I'm trying to view AF as a pathway to starting TTC again.

This path we're being made to walk is beyond horrid and filled with reminders of what we've lost. There's nothing I can say it make you feel any better but I'm here to chat if you'd like to.
Iím so sorry for your loss Hun, itís absolutely the worst thing to happen to anyone to lose a baby.

Iíve started spotting a pinky/brown this morning and cramping so will probably be full on AF by later tonight Iím relieved itís started because I can start planning for TTC in a month or two, but sad because itís like a reminder of everything thatís happened. The cramping and bleeding

No investigations are being done for me as heís my first loss that wasnít a very early/chemical and Iíve had two healthy term children in between so they think itís just one of those things. He also had an erratic heart rate for the couple of weeks before he passed away so thatís a factor.

I hope youíre as okay as you can be xx



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Old Dec 7th, 2017, 05:08 AM   4
loves_cookies
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Just thought i'd check in to see how you're doing generally and how you're coping with AF? Looks like mine has returned too at exactly 4 weeks. Spotting all day yesterday, flow today.

I wish hospital staff wouldn't put it down to one of those things, because it so isn't at this stage. Did you have a post mortem or anything?



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Old Dec 8th, 2017, 15:35 PM   5
xCookieDoughx
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Originally Posted by loves_cookies View Post
Just thought i'd check in to see how you're doing generally and how you're coping with AF? Looks like mine has returned too at exactly 4 weeks. Spotting all day yesterday, flow today.

I wish hospital staff wouldn't put it down to one of those things, because it so isn't at this stage. Did you have a post mortem or anything?
I have had a heavy flow for the last 2 days but itís slowed right down now so I think itís almost finished.

In general I feel like Iím coping okay, trying to stay busy and stay upbeat for my children. It is hard, especially when I see other pregnant women and newborns

We didnít have a post mortem, the closest place to us that performs them is over an hour away and I couldnít stand the thought of him being away from here and not knowing where he was. So we decided against any testing. We just wanted to lay him to rest. So he was cremated 2 weeks after he was born.

Me and my husband have decided that now Iíve had a period we are going to NTNP, just to let nature be nature. It kind of helps my crazy mind in a way. Nothing will ever replace Albie, not ever. But I feel like all the love I have to give to another child is just going to explode out of me at any moment.

How are you doing? Xx



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