Hallo everyone,

I had my first darling girl on 19 December 2011 and she is the joy of my life. She had complications after birth, but is now a healthy 3 and half month old baby that loves to smile and giggle.

In end of Feb I had all the normal signs of pregnancy and knew it was true although I just started on the Pill in end of Jan. I went to my gynaecologist and mentioned it and she just said that it could be gas and so on. Even when I asked if the contraception might cause some of the symptoms she denied it.

In early March I had 2 positive hpt and knew it to be true, but had a feeling that something is wrong - even thought I'm starting to become crazy. I went for blood test and they told me that my Hcg levels are too low and that the contraception might cause false symptoms. So I believed it as it made sense.

So my nausea, cramps, bigger tender breasts, cravings and sensitivity to smell proceeded eventhough I went off the contraception. Had brown spotting though, but no period.

On Monday it was confirmed from another doctor that it is a miscarriage. I don't need to go in for a check up afterwards as my bleeding started. It's heavy and hurt like crazy. I drink strong meds and usually don't need any with my normal periods - actually, it's the meds they prescribed when I had my section but didn't needed it at the time after the first week. Now I cant' drink enough of it.

I am teary and down. My husband try to comfort me, but I know that he wasn't ready for another baby yet and think he might be relieved, not that he wouldn't love the baby if everything went well. I just feel so alone.

I know that I am not the only person experiencing such a sad tragedy. I just wish it could be so different.

I am sorry for your loss, we are all going through the same thing on here and I find this board very helpful in my healing process. We are all hear if you want to chat or rant, sending you loads of hugs