I feel like I'm grieving alone. My husband is trying to be supportive but I can tell his heart isn't shattered like mine. I'm having dreams almost every night. I'm either pregnant still or holding my baby in my arms.
It was a week ago today that I had the d&c. I had a decent couple days this week, and now I'm totally falling apart all over again. The pain seems to be getting harder to handle.
I'm 34 and I feel like that was my last chance.
People keep saying "there must've been something wrong with it."
I'm so sorry for your loss I'm experiencing my first mc and understand that heartache. I also understand having a husband who doesn't have the same connection to the baby as a mom does. You love them the second you see two lines on the test I wish I had something to say to ease the pain but the only thing that has helped me was/is putting all my energy into my one son becuase I don't want to miss a second with the child I have. I may never have another either...and honestly the thought of going through another mc makes me feel....like I don't have the strenghth.... I hope you find peace and comfort and I truly pray that you have the abilty to have another sweet baby in your arms
I've been finding this week really hard too, esp yesterday, its been 7 weeks since i lost the baby (8 weeks saw hb at 6 week scan then gone at 8). Still haven't had a proper period since then had about 9 days of brown bleeding (sorry if tmi!) staring 19 days ago which my gp said was likely period but now CD 19 no ovulataion??
Think thats not helping because aswell as feeling like I should be 15 weeks pregnant, not slightly fatter that I was (due a new found obsession with Minstrels!), I feel like my body has gone wrong and I am never going to get the chance to be a Mum
Met a friend last week (Not planned just walking down the street) and she is 14 weeks pregnant, and has put it up on facebook with scan pic so I congratulated her and she said "news travels fast" I aggreed but said that i was prob more aware of these things as I had had a miscarriage- she said oh well you've had problems before haven't you- I had an ovarian cyst op like a year ago hardly releated!!! I know that because she is pregnant she prob doesn;t want to think about anything bad happening but saying I'm sorry wouldn't have hurt!
Hubby keeps saying we'll get pregnant again but I'm not convinced
Sorry for the rant!! bad day (I really hope this will get better!)
Big hugs to everyone
Oh, Sprite 2011, I'm so sorry dear! People are so heartless!! Miscarriage hurts like nothing I've ever felt before! People's words are like a knife right through the heart!! Hugs and prayers for you!!!
I am so so sorry girl. I lost our baby at 8 weeks 5 days almost a year ago and I still have a hard time with it sometimes. One of the biggest issues has been my DH not being as upset as I was. I just could not understand how he did not miss our baby as much as I did and how he was not completely shattered like me. He just wanted to fix it.. like "okay you are sad lets just have another and move on" and I was so baffled at that. But what I have learned through this is that men are fixers and he just wanted to fix it. Not deal with all my crazy emotions over the last year. Around our due date, he finally opened up and said he was very sad about it and that he was just trying to be strong for me because I was always crying and my heart was just sad. He figured that if he did not cry or drag it on, eventually I would be fine rather than if he was devastated as well. Men also do not feel much until they actually feel the baby move or see their baby for the first time. I am so sorry that you are feeling sad, it never goes away, but I promise you, it DOES get easier. You will have a healthy baby, I will pray for you. BIG HUGS. and sorry for the novel!
I found out I miscarried on Sunday. Yesterday was super hard but since I have to work today it doesnt seem to be as bad. Maybe just knowing I have to do something is taking my mind somewhat away from it but look where I am. This is by far the hardest thing I have ever went through!!! Not too much pain yet but have had some cramping on and off, but seems to be worse after I eat (wierd) I have told so many people about my pregnancy. I have been able to tell my close friends and family about the mc but I am just going to put in on Facebook and hope not too many people ask questions. There really isnt anything anyone can say to make it easier. I am trying to hold on to the fact that it isnt a problem with me. The baby just wasnt strong enough. I can concieve again and chances are the baby will stick. It is hard to believe so many people have to go through this pain and most dont get to talk about it much. I am so sorry for all the pain everyone is feeling. It is somewhat comforting to know I can come here and chat to people who are experiencing the same grief and total depression I am.
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