Step parents support thread

whats up? Mines been ok apart form OH not telling him to go to bed so he fell asleep in the sofa at midnight and left tv and lights on everywhere til about 6am Why is it so hard for OH to make a bed time for him? I think I be the one making rules for Leo

My SD is a very sweet very well behaved little girl...at our house.

Her mom has NO rules for her, lets her run wild, and treats her like shit. When we get SD, her attitude is awful. She talks back horribly, doesn't listen, sasses me.

I hate punishing her that first few days, cuz I know that's not who she is, it's her mother. Her mom is a class A bitch, and I think honestly she's not quite right......some of the things she says and does just aren't...as a mother myself, they don't make sense.

I hate punishing her, but if I don't give her a concequence, it doesn't stop. She treats my like shit the entire time we have her.

Usually, the longer she's hear, the better she behaves. And generally after the first 24 hours or so, she's acting like the little girl her daddy raised, who is yes, still a kid and still screws up sometimes, but we expect that. She's 7. No kid is perfect. But she starts being respectful, following the rules, and not sassing back at everything I say.

This weekend though, I don't know what the hell her problem is. I've asked her a few times if everything's okay, if anything happened at home, if there's anything she wants to talk about. She always says no and starts talking about school. I dunno.

I am sick and tired tho, of her being a pain in the ass this weekend. She's mouthing back, bossing me around, being sassy and talking back. I swear to god, one of these days, I will clip her across the mouth. MIL has said that she totally agrees with me, this child needs someone to put her back in her place one of these times, but her mother would instantly drag us to CPS and throw a fit.

No one jump on me cuz I advocate spanking and physical discipline. I do NOT beat children, and it is my right as a parent to parent as I choose. I don't jump anyone else cuz of their parenting.

Sorry to be defensive, the ladies in baby club always jump me and get after me for saying i spank and tell me my kids will be horrid people.

*and breathe*

I feel bad cuz we haven't done anything 'fun' this weekend. Normally I take her to the park or to get ice cream or something.... But I refuse to reward her for bad behavior. We've played games, done stuff. She's not just locked in her room.

But she asked why we haven't done anything 'special' and I told her if she started being good like I know her daddy raised her and was respectful to me and treated me like the mommy of the house like she normally does, I might be willing to do something special. But when she's mean to me and bosses me around, no, that I don't wanna be super nice and do anything fun and special for a mean little girl that's not nice to me.

*sigh*

I just dunno.

Originally Posted by cowboys angel

But she asked why we haven't done anything 'special' and I told her if she started being good like I know her daddy raised her and was respectful to me and treated me like the mommy of the house like she normally does, I might be willing to do something special. But when she's mean to me and bosses me around, no, that I don't wanna be super nice and do anything fun and special for a mean little girl that's not nice to me.

*sigh*

I just dunno.

that sounds a good way to do it to me. SS knows we wont let him play his games if he misbehaves. We went to the garden centre today and he just spent the whole time hitting the displays and swearing Also I cooked a lovely meal yesterday and his mum called him home to give him 4 packs of microwave chips! I dont think micro chips are the best for a 9yr old to live on SS's mum doesnt disipline him either so when hes here and plays up he thinks he can get away with it. OH does give him a little slap on the back if hes very bad. He tried to push Leo into the road when we went to a busy city recently and OH flipped! Obviously ss's mum didnt mind him doing that when she was told

I'm just...almost at my wits end this weekend.

It's not all her, we have a lot going on that has nothing to do with her and it's not her fault. I know I'm stressed and scared and worried.

GAH! Even as I type this she's arguing with me. I told her to find lunch. She said okay, and then as she looks, starts mouthing off and being a little ass......

*sigh*

I'm tired, stressed, scared, and pissed off (only the pissed off part is at her )

*sigh*

We've had her since Thursday night. Generally by Friday afternoon-evening she is behaving like she knows she's supposed to. It's now Saturday afternoon....she goes home tomorrow evening...

some kids really love to wind you up so she might just be in a mood like that and be enjoying being a pain? Is she doing it to her dad too or is it just you? SS is getting moody at Leo cos he keeps crying cos hes teething. Leo cant help it and he can hardly breath cos hes screaming that much
The lunch things is annoying with me. If I cooked a lovely homecooked meal then he gets given micro chips and noodle cups ( great diet for a little boy eh?) its not very nice to me. But his mum does spend his money from OH on beer and crisps and take aways so I can expect much can I?
OH has told me wer going to bring Leo up so differrently but Im worried that he'll see SS doing things and getting away with it and he'll wonder why its different rules
Im also holding off Leo having to share rooms as I know for a fact ss's mum will moan about them sharing, even though ss is only here 2/4 days a month
Your steppie is probably just looking for a reaction from you so just ignore her. Put some food out for her lunch and walk away and leave her to sulk

She sometimes does it to my DH but she knows better. Even when she's being a pain, she knows better than to upset daddy. He'd never hurt her, but she just knows better.

She might be doing it on purpose I suppose.

I finally put some leftover spaghetti on the table and told her that was lunch and she gets no treats unless she eats it and starts being good.

So she ate it, and is now watching a movie.

She keeps going "Momma? Are you gonna tell daddy I was bad?" *insert scared face* Lol

Well I finally had it out with her.

I told her I am sick and tired of her acting like some awful little kid that had no parents to teach her how to behave. That I know she can behave. She is a very sweet very kind very smart very loving little girl so I don't know what the deal is this weekend but I know she knows how to listen and how to behave and be good and I expect it to start if she doesn't want to be grounded for the rest of the weekend.

Her lip went out and I told her no pouting. She knows she was bad, don't pout at me for something she chose to do, now she can choose to be good or choose to be grounded.

She said 'sorry mommy, I'll be good, I promise." and kissed my cheek. Big improvement already!

aww SS is cuddled up on the sofa with Leo right now which is cute. He wants to put him to bed soon too. I need to work out as OH had apple pie and custard and I needed some

Aww! And YUMMM!Can I have some?