Its tiresome and stressful! You'll be on your feet within 2 weeks but you might still feel foggy all over and have some pain if you end up with stitches or c section. I think if you can stand it its a wonderful idea to have some help...sleepless nights are absolutely not fun! Ive done it on my own so far and while im surviving its felt like a gigantic train wreck at times. Oh and I forgot to mention baby blues....I didn't get it that bad just the first week I was constantly crying just looking at my daughter id bust into tears thinking something was wrong with her....even if she was just sleeping soundly in my arms : / Its a lot of adjusting in the first few months..getting used to this new little person that needs you every second of every day. Its wonderful and you'll be filled with joy and excitement for everyday but you'll also worry about every little thing, convince yourself that your a terrible mom and your doing everything wrong, you'll fight with OH or whoever is around you, and you'll be willing to give up your left kidney for a few hours of sleep! But everytime you look at your little one (usually when theyre sleeping and not crying) you'll forget about everything else around you and just get lost in that moment
I think everyones experience is completely different. We live a little drive from family, hubby went back to work after 2 weeks with ds, and I was left getting on my own - tbh it was good to work out my own little routine. I wouldn't have wanted 3 months worth of help personally. I wanted to find my own feet, work out how to do it. DS was a very content baby though, I just followed his lead and although I was super tired, I slept when he did, and I may be crucified for this, but I found the newborn stage a bit boring, I was expecting fireworks, but newborns do sleep a heck of a lot. (like I say ds was super chilled - I was very lucky). He was awake most of the night the first few weeks, but slept a lot during the day, so I slept with him! :-)
I had very little pain after delivery, even with a few stitches and the bleeding wasn't as bad as I thought. The main thing for me was being surprised at how much time babies take up! At first because it takes them so long to eat and because I didn't want to set her down. My OH took two weeks off when my DD was born and that seemed pretty good to me... One more week of help might've been nice but I doubt you'll want three months of full time help, depending on how baby sleeps etc.
For me the first two months were hard and then it got much easier. After two weeks I was on my feet but still a hot mess overall and hobbling around due to bad spd/pgp that lingered. Your birh will have a huge impact on how you are after two weeks and mine was horrible so I was slower to recover physically than other women I have talked to. I had family around for a few weeks and while the help was great in some ways it was also stressful having company living with me. When it's just you, lo and your oh you are better able to fall into a routine and learn to understand their needs without excessive interference. In other ways the help is so good because it is so totally full on for the first six weeks and probably especially if you are breastfeeding. It really depends on how much your oh helps and if oh is around. If I'd been single I would have been incredibly thankful for any help. Can you stand having company for that long - even if it is your folks? I wouldn't turn down help in the first three to six weeks but if they are living with you that would be a lot for three months.
Ask them to come, if you feel like kicking them out after a few weeks, you can tell them to take a trip or go back?
For me, the first few months were hard because it was so repetitive, tiring, and mind numbing ( newborns live in their own world, you're there to serve their needs only) - I needed a bit of adult interactions and also a bit of time to myself each day to recharge - even cleaning became a good escape. Having people to talk to or take LO off your hands for an hour each day can really help.
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