I am still traumatized by my LO's arrival and upset to know that I will never have another chance to have a better experience with a second LO. Purely out of fear that would have another experience like this and also because hubby and I both agreed that we would only have one.

I don't want to rewrite my whole story because it took me quite some time to get it all down in detail. But if you all are curious you can find it here:

http://www.babyandbump.com/postnatal...-my-story.html

I was really dissapointed in my birth, I made it to 10cm and pushed for two hours only to get sent to have a csection because the nurse kept checking me after they broke my waters and I guess that I was at high risk for infection and my baby's heart rate would jump and dip with every contraction. I feel a lot of my labor that I wasnt cared for properly and if I would have went to a different hospital I might have been able to go vaginally. It seemed like they were neglecting my needs because I was on public insurance, even the nurse when coming in was giving me a horrible attitude even thought I KNEW I was in labor, she kept insisting that I wasn't and acting like I was stupid or something and giving me dirty looks because I was crying because of the contractions. Also when I was pushing there was this dumb male nurse who kept coming in and out of the room making me loose my concentration pushing, it was so nerve racking he kept coming in right when I started to push AND my legs were up in the air! its like he wasnt there for any reason just to SEE a birth! I am very traumatized and am getting a IUD AND going to use condoms, I do NOT want any more kids after what happened to me,

Crumbs i had no idea u felt like tht hun xx sorry for saying u were lucky i can see why it was scary x - and i know how u feel about violated when i had the womb infection they had to keep doing internals scooping out the clots out of my vagina.. and a man did it one time while i was having all tht bleeding so embarasing then anoher time a woman was doing it and a man was watching over her shoulder i asked if he had to stay and they siad he did.. then i found out he was just training tht he didnt actualy have to stay.. i was on my own and vulnerable .. they did nt treat me like a human being my whole hospital stay.. noeone even lknocks before they come into ur room even if ur naked they just open the door wide xx

d_b thanks, it was scary. But in comparison to what story's people are posting here, i guess it does seem perfect? It seems ideal as I missed out all the pain and everything.

Youngwife20 It's ok, I don't blame anyone for saying I was lucky. In a way I was because it was painless and my baby was completely fine
Luckily I didn't have people coming in when I was naked or anything. It was just when they got me to hospital about 20 doctors were in my room because I wasn't in the best way, then they just pulled my pants down and started looking at everything (working out what tear I had) but it was horrible. Then in the theatre there was four men doctors, one doing the stitching. Don't get me Wong, they were great. One man was holding my hand talking to me to keep me conscious, he was lovely. But it was all too much.

Sorry to hear about everyone elses experiences I guess the only way you can see it is at least you and your LOs are healthy and nothing major went wrong (ie something life threatening to either you or your LO)

Ahh thanks for sharing ladies.

I think I am just really shocked still all I can remember is my screams and not opening my eyes until it was all over...

The thing that really gets me is I can't remember first looking at Ivy! And I don't remember her first cry :'(

yes only because they didnt believe I was in labour just because the stupid monitor wasnt picking up my contractions as i was having back labour, when i had the urge to push MW checked and i was 7/8cm dilated and then i over done it on the gas and air, dont remember them putting her on me when she was born, hardly got any pictures of her either when she first popped out

Your story is exactly the same! I over done it on Gas and air too.... with back labour. They also didn't believe i was contracting because it was in my back! I was getting them every five mins for 3 days and they didn't believe me when I told them how bad they was.... I really think I needed to be induced because my cervix was stuck at 1cm the whole time and I kept bleeding heavily.... I don't know how they could leave me that bad for 3 days I couldn't sit,stand,walk or even lie down with them. The only thing they offered me was codiene because of it being in my back they said they wouldn't offer me anything until 4cm when I could have an epidural....

The gas and air made me soo dizzy thats why I couldn't open my eyes I could see six things at once.. And I can only remember certain things.... I do remember feeling the cord in-between my legs and ivy wriggling on my chest but it worries me that i was so 'out of it'

I think next time I will not touch the stuff the birth has seriously affected my bonding with Ivy....

i was happy with myself that i could deliever naturally and no pain relief but id rather had not been induced

I had a horrible time too! Laboured at home with tens machine for 22 hours, admitted to birth centre where I was 4-5cms, checked 7 hours later and still only 4-5cms so transferred to labour ward for hormone drip. That's where it all went wrong, as I'd been awake for nearly 48 hours I was encouraged to have an epidural (the last thing I'd wanted) and was so exhausted I agreed. Laboured on for 10 more hours, during which bubs was having decels. Had 3 foetal blood samplings done, all fine except the very last one which was 'borderline' so they said I couldn't push and it would be forceps or EMCS. Oh and just as they upped the drip to get rid of a cervical lip my epidural came detached and I had to wait for an anaesthetist to become available to fix it. Then into theatre for forceps, delivered bubs in 2 pushes but got a third degree tear on top of my episiotomy, and lost 1.5 litres of blood. Two transfusions and a lot of stitches later, bubs developed some spots and we then stayed in for 5 days while he was treated with antibiotics. Time on the maternity ward was like actual hell, having to look after him all alone at night with the injuries and the midwives were so rude and awful. I wish they had told me at the time that an epidural means you are 50% more likely to have an assisted birth-I would never have had it if I'd known and probably wouldn't have had such a wretched birth experience. Won't be going to that hospital in future that's for sure.

Sorry for the rant!

Oh yes.....also had a back to back labour....syntocin drip for hours, established stage lasted over 43 hours, only remember tiny fragments and cant stop going over it, danny came out not breathing, cord snapped right away, he was rushed immediately out the room then they took my OH out and it felt like they were out for an hour (was about 10 mins), argh i just stillcant stop thinking about it all. i am happy i have my healthy wee man but have so many regrets. i cry everytimei see these perfect calm waterbirths on OBEM, or the births where baby is immediately crying then laid on mummys chest......
im almost desperate to have another baby just to try and "do it properly" this time....sounds wrong but thats how my brain seems to think :/