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Old Jul 30th, 2016, 14:32 PM   11
Sophie2015
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Quote:
Originally Posted by raine87 View Post
Hey all I would like to join! I've have 1 pregnancy that they consider a chemical pregnancy even though I had missed my period which happened on Feb 13th, 2015. I had a second miscarriage this year on Feb 11th. We were almost 8 weeks along. My EDD is 3/29/17. My doctor wants me to do an early scan but I'm pretty scared and I'm going to try to let it grow as much as possible before I schedule anything. My doctor has been checking my HCG levels this last week and the last one she did was 104 on Wednesday. I'm very cautiously optimistic about this pregnancy. My DH acts like it's not really happening yet. Anyone else having that issue?
I'm so sorry for your losses. I've lost 4 myself. It's a sadness that never truly leaves you.

How far along are you? I'm sorry your DH isn't more supportive. I honestly don't have that problem but I think men sometimes distance themselves as a coping mechanism. Also so many men have trouble attaching to a pregnancy until they can see it on ultrasound. They don't feel the symptoms so it's hard for them to get as excited at first.

Welcome. Praying we all get our rainbow babies.



 
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Old Jul 30th, 2016, 19:33 PM   12
raine87
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I'm in my fifth week. He's supportive, just not very enthusiastic. He doesn't want to tell his mom yet. I don't understand why. She would be there for us if we did have another loss.



 
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Old Jul 30th, 2016, 19:38 PM   13
Sophie2015
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After 4 losses we haven't told any family yet. Although I've told a handful of friends. I'm not sure why though. We might as well announce because every baby we've lost we shared the news of the loss with everyone. For some reason I can't hide the fact there was another baby. It seems wrong to me. I'm not sure when we'll finally tell everyone this time. I guess we'll see how far we get first.



 
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Old Jul 31st, 2016, 03:30 AM   14
mrs unicorn
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I think DH and I are both surprised at how we're coping so far. I thought I'd be a nervous wreck but I'm so calm! It's not like last time, which is sad because we were so excited, but he has rubbed my belly a couple of times and asked how bubs is.

Telling people is tricky but it's totally a personal decision. We don't want to tell anyone before 12 weeks. We didn't tell anyone with the last one until the mc. For me, I don't want people going out celebrating and buying stuff (trust me my mum would go wild!) and then having that heartbreak if it goes wrong again. It would upset me. But we are going to have to tell people before this time. I'm going to a spa with my sil who had a mc in May. I'll be 7 weeks, so she'll twig straight away when I'm not drinking / hot tub / sauna etc. Plus my mum is stopping for my birthday in September, I'll be 9 weeks then. She knows we're TTC so I can't hide the not drinking on my birthday. Thing is I know she'll go tell everyone even if I ask her not to. So we might have to tell my dad and DHs parents then too. Don't want to though.



 
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Old Jul 31st, 2016, 03:34 AM   15
mrs unicorn
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I'm seriously considering trying to cancel her coming over. Bit harsh though when she's booked time off. I'm cool with my bro and SIL knowing. They're going through a loss so they will respect our wishes. They actually told everyone at 8 weeks and mc at 10 so they will understand. But my mum.... urgh. Guess we'll see how far we actually get.



 
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Old Aug 1st, 2016, 16:50 PM   16
klabro
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Hi ladies, welcome everyone new. Sorry for all of the losses.

I'll jump in on the telling people. I'm going to tell my mom and mother in law probably around 10ish weeks just because I have to get a cerclage put in at 12 weeks and I will need some help for a week or so with DD while I recover and hubby is at work. Other than tell immediate family and people I see on a regular basis, I'm going to tell people when I have a healthy baby in my arms. I don't really live by any family and I just don't plan on announcing. I think part of this was because I waited until 20 weeks to announce with my twins and then they were born at 21 weeks and I just don't think I'll ever really feel ready to put it out there.



 
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Old Aug 2nd, 2016, 01:50 AM   17
mrs unicorn
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Klabro - that's totally understandable not wanting a big announcement. We won't be doing the whole Facebook thing. Since my MMC I haven't been on social media, if found it so hard seeing all my 'friends' baby pics and preggo announcements. Obviously it's different with my close friends as we are properly in touch not just in a Facebook way!

Raine how are you doing hun? Have you managed to chat to your DH?

I'm feeling ok at the moment. Not letting myself think about actually having a baby. I'm a planner and I love it but I'm not letting myself do or think about any kind of planning. I think it's the only way ill be able to get through the next few weeks without losing it with worry. I had a sharp twinge in Sunday and it scared me. It was only for a second and nothing since but I just keep thinking it might have already gone. I've stopped worrying now but.... Idk, it wouldn't surprise me if it's another blighted ovum now. Sorry, I know it's a really negative way to be but I guess it's some sort of protection?

How is everyone else doing?



 
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Old Aug 2nd, 2016, 02:28 AM   18
Sophie2015
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I've had a really scary weekend. Had a really bad cold with fever and lost all my symptoms. My RE moved my ultrasound up to tomorrow. I'm calm now but I keep thinking it's gonna be another mmc. 😕
I guess once you've lived through the hell of mc it's really hard to find the joy in pregnancy. At least during the first trimester.



 
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Old Aug 2nd, 2016, 02:34 AM   19
mrs unicorn
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Sophie so sorry you've been ill it's great that your scan has been moved, fx all will be well. I'm trying not to read too much into symptoms because I had all the normal symptoms with my blighted ovum (until 9 weeks when they started to ease) so they meant nothing. I know it's hard though, it's like they are the only indicators we have, although not reliable.

Yes, it is sad that after a loss pregnancy is no longer the same. I knew this early stage would be horrible, but so far it's not as bad as I thought. Hopefully soon we'll all start to feel more confident and tentatively start to enjoy it. I'm thinking that's a few weeks off yet.



 
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Old Aug 2nd, 2016, 08:58 AM   20
raine87
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Sorry to hear you're having a rough time Sophie. Keep us updated on what's going on.

Mrs. U-- I haven't really talked to him about it. I know he'll come around when he's ready. He's not a big talked when it comes to feel gs and stuff. His actions show me he's excited. If I say I'm thirsty he jumps up and gets me something to drink, etc. I think he's just taking some time to come around.



 
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