Can't seem to relax or be excited. I feel sad because this may be my first full term baby and all the joy is taken out of it. Have any of u ladies who have carried full term after mc got any advice and did u ever enjoy ur pregnancy? Xx
hi same here- im 14 weeks so a little behind you, but after 1 mc and 1 mmc i still can not look into the future to plan, i wont allow anyone to buy any baby stuff, i cringe when people start talking about the baby as if they are going to jinx it! I know its crazy and i thought once id seen the 12 week scan id be more relaxed, but im not, really wish i could be 100% happy and relaxed but have convinced myself the moment i stop worrying is the moment something will go wrong
After a mc and two possible chemicals, my LO was born earlier this month (see my post 'SabrinaKat's Good News'), so it is possible to get the happy ending! I was worried, nervous and anxious throughout my pregnancy, but my advice is:
1. Take it one day/one hour at a time.
2. If you break into 'milestones', e.g. the 12wk scan, the 16wk scan, feeling the baby finally move, etc., it is perhaps more manageable mentally.
3. If you don't want to buy anything because you're superstitious - that's fine!
4. If people tell you everything will be fine and you are having a bad time, just smile (unless it's the doctor looking at a scan with good news!)
5. If you still remember the mc/lost little one and feel a little sad, that's okay!
6. If people ask you if it's your first, it's okay to say 'yes' -- you're not forgetting the lost ones, just making it easier for yourself with strangers.
7. It's okay to worry every single day, but also visualise yourself with baby in your arms sometimes too!
8. If something doesn't feel right, TELL YOUR DOCTOR (ultimately, I was diagnosed with high blood pressure in wk32 -- made it to wk36, said to my ob/gyn -- I don't feel right, blood work showed PE, and baby delivered that day (we're both fine)
9. It's okay to NOT think about the pregnancy sometimes -- there's nothing wrong with you for feeling disconnected -- it's a protection mechanism and NORMAL
10. Nothing is a greater feeling than when LO is placed in your arms and to sigh later and wonder about the lost babies is OK.
and LOU, we bought pretty much nothing either -- and with baby 'early', friends and relatives brought loads of emergency stuff to the hospital (and my OH ran down the hall with clothes for a 6 month old when I called him to say I was having an emergency c-section)
Thank you ladies for your supportive replies l really don't want to be negative and try to keep thinking another weeks gone by and try to visualise the baby in my arms. Sabrinakat thank you for those points you have made its like you have read my mind l do feel all of those things, l did read your good news post and was so happy for you it made me cry as it was so positive. I hope you and your little one are doing well? X
Any opinions, advice, statements or other information expressed or made available on BabyandBump.Momtastic.com by users or third parties, including but not limited to bloggers, are solely those of the respective user or other third party. They do not reflect the opinions of BabyandBump.Momtastic.com and they have not been reviewed by a physician, psychologist or parenting expert or any member of the BabyandBump.Momtastic.com staff for accuracy, balance or objectivity. Content and other information presented on BabyandBump.Momtastic.com are not a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice, counseling, diagnosis, or treatment. Never delay or disregard seeking professional medical or mental health advice from your physician or other qualified health provider because of something you have read on BabyandBump.Momtastic.com. BabyandBump.Momtastic.com does not endorse any opinion, advice, statement, product, service or treatment made available on the website. If you think you have a medical emergency, call your doctor or emergency services immediately.