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Old Jul 30th, 2017, 18:30 PM   1
krissie328
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Daycare after baby is born


So my son currently is in daycare 2 days a week. I was going to continue this after my second is born. However, the due date is in Feb and that's right in cold and flu season. I am now wondering if I should keep ds home through my maternity leave until April?

What would you ladies do?



 
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Old Jul 30th, 2017, 22:39 PM   2
Zephram
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Keep your son in daycare!! Seriously, you will need the break and the time just for you and your newborn.

DS1 was in kindy 2 days a week when DS2 was born and it was fantastic - he got to go have fun at kindy and not have his life ruled by DS2's naps and DS2 and I got to have some time just for us that we would not have got at all if DS1 didn't have some time in preschool.

Don't worry about colds and flu. You will not be able to stop your kids getting sick no matter what you do, you don't live in a sterile bubble. DS2 caught his first cold at 7 days old and he's absolutely fine.



 
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Old Jul 30th, 2017, 22:56 PM   3
krissie328
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Thanks! That's really what I was leaning towards as well. I think the time at daycare will benefit us all and give DS a sense of normal. He loves going too and will probably be more fun then his exhausted mommy.



 
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Old Jul 31st, 2017, 11:39 AM   4
MindUtopia
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Yes, I would keep him there. My situation is a bit different as mine starts school in September so we don't have the choice to not send her, but we still would anyway. I think you'll appreciate the one on one time it buys you. In fact, mine is off for 10 days right around my due date and we are putting her in to holiday club for that reason as we have no guarantee of what shape we'll be in (she had a lot of weight gain issues and we were in and out of hospital that first month, I couldn't do that and have her home). Unless you plan to avoid contact with the outside world, you'll not avoid contact with bugs. But I would make sure you get the flu shot, whooping cough, all your recommended vaccinations in pregnancy and make sure your older one is up to date as well.



 
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Old Jul 31st, 2017, 14:45 PM   5
jessmke
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We can't really justify the expense of DD going to daycare while I am on maternity leave, but if money was no object we would totally do it. She was going two afternoons a week when I was working and she absolutely loves it. I know she would be ecstatic to go back to play with all her friends, and I would enjoy the one on one time with the baby, but we are just doing lots of play dates with other families instead as those are free. I would say that so long as you can afford it, and your DS enjoys going, then totally keep him in daycare regardless of it being cold/flu season.



 
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Old Aug 5th, 2017, 21:25 PM   6
Pekka
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Hi! We had two children 3 and 2 but we never leave our first born to other people's care. Only relatives if available but if not it's just my husband and I. Our first born is not hard to handle so we are okay with it. Besides, I will be more worried if I don't see her in a day.



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Old Aug 6th, 2017, 02:11 AM   7
WackyMumof2
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A friend of mine does In Home Care so DS3 will go to her as normal after baby arrives. Working around D-Day will be hard though as she's also qualified in therapeutic massage and is doing my massage in labour. I'll be going back to work when my leave runs out so she will have baby too. By the little ones not being here means I will be able to study and clean. With all the negative accusations that some fathers have been getting in regards to parenting daughters hubby won't change her anyway. There's been some pretty horrendous news in regards here in NZ in the last 10 years and he worries that someone will see what they want to see. He's heart-broken with everything that has been around over the years as it means not only does he miss out on valuable time with his daughter, she will miss out on being at home with it just being her and Daddy. I KNOW hubby and I trust him with mine and my kids life but he's just so scared and won't bath, change or dress her because of it all.



 
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Old Aug 6th, 2017, 05:00 AM   8
krissie328
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Wackymum- what a sad day we live in when a girl's daddy can even properly take care of her.

Thanks ladies for all the replies. I think we'll likely keep ds in 1-2 days then. It sounds like it would be good for us both. My mom also can take him on her days off so it should be good support for me.



 
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Old Aug 7th, 2017, 19:02 PM   9
Zephram
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WackyMumof2 View Post
A friend of mine does In Home Care so DS3 will go to her as normal after baby arrives. Working around D-Day will be hard though as she's also qualified in therapeutic massage and is doing my massage in labour. I'll be going back to work when my leave runs out so she will have baby too. By the little ones not being here means I will be able to study and clean. With all the negative accusations that some fathers have been getting in regards to parenting daughters hubby won't change her anyway. There's been some pretty horrendous news in regards here in NZ in the last 10 years and he worries that someone will see what they want to see. He's heart-broken with everything that has been around over the years as it means not only does he miss out on valuable time with his daughter, she will miss out on being at home with it just being her and Daddy. I KNOW hubby and I trust him with mine and my kids life but he's just so scared and won't bath, change or dress her because of it all.
I live in NZ too and I have to say I think your OH is overreacting. All the dads with daughters I know are very hands on and that's normal - a man being a father is not something that gets him accused of doing anything funny. Sounds like he needs talking down as that's not a normal reaction in my view. I've never seen or heard of a normal father in NZ being accused of any untoward from taking care of their daughter and changing nappies, etc.



 
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Old Aug 8th, 2017, 04:54 AM   10
WackyMumof2
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[QUOTE=Zephram;38525143]
Quote:
Originally Posted by WackyMumof2 View Post
I live in NZ too and I have to say I think your OH is overreacting. All the dads with daughters I know are very hands on and that's normal - a man being a father is not something that gets him accused of doing anything funny. Sounds like he needs talking down as that's not a normal reaction in my view. I've never seen or heard of a normal father in NZ being accused of any untoward from taking care of their daughter and changing nappies, etc.
He will help - he just won't change or bath her. And to be honest, I know of a lot of Dad's who feel the same. Given recent events with his step brother and his 'extra curricular activities' with his ex-partner's 9 year old, it's only made the fear worse for him. Especially when he told his step-daughter that he loved her and that she can't tell Mum! We both spoke highly of his brother, said he was a good man, awesome with kids etc. Yes, well, proved us all wrong.



 
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