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Old Feb 7th, 2011, 07:56 AM   1
snj
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Anyone having mixed feelings about pregnancy?


hey folks...
Congratulations to everyone with their pregnancies. So i havent spoken to anyone about my feelings in regard to my very first pregnancy which happened very soon i am only 26 and its been only 7 months since i gt married. i knw i wanted a baby bt not so soon. my husband was more keen on having a baby. I have several issues for one as PCOS. so i dint thnk i had get pregnant. so v nvr took protection. well when i did find out i was pregnant i was very happy since i thought my chances were less. but now i have these feelings that depresses me that it happened too soon. I mean i jst got married theres more that needed to happen before a kid. I havent had enough of just living as "us" (i mean me and him)...we dint even get a chance to go for a honeymoon(which i so regret though he promises he will take me). I hope u peepz are understanding what i am trying to say. i feel ashamed at times to think this way. i know a child is a blessing and i always wanted one but why m i not so happy. Does it happen to u. i wish i was more happy about this. the doc said there could b som complications but i am taking care and doing everything as said by doc to protect my baby. I couldnt talk about all this to anyone i am trying to talk it here. hope u moms-to-be can help me overcome such feeling. thank you for hearing me out.



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Old Feb 7th, 2011, 08:05 AM   2
Mama627
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I think what you're going through is perfectly normal. Anyone on here who says they never had a moments doubt during their pregnancy is probably lying. Worrying about how a baby will change things financially or how it'll change your relationship with your husband is very very common. So is worrying about what kind of mother you'll make, or whether you're too old/too young to be having kids. Everyone has something they worry about.

For me, I worry about having 2 young children at once (my daughter is 13 months, and I'm 7 weeks along), and I worry how our families are going to react to the news that we're having another since everyone tells us not to have more for a while. It's not that we're a burden on any of them, but both of our parents had babies close together and our mothers say it was a lot of work... although they both say it was worth it.



 
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Old Feb 7th, 2011, 08:09 AM   3
SeaThreePeeO
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I believe these feelings are perfectly normal. Lets face it, pregnancy, birth and babies are big changes to your life and it is perfectly natural to feel anxious and even upset over something you feel you have no control over.

I have recently discovered I'm expecting my 3rd child and while my husband was overjoyed I sank into depression. I felt it had happened at the wrong time due to my youngest only just starting school. I felt like this pregnancy and baby was going to 'ruin' our comfortable happy lives. I really feel awful about the way I was feeling as we had actually tried for this baby.

However my depression has now lifted and while I still do have moment where I wonder if I am doing the right thing for all of us, I am now getting excited about having this baby.


((((hugs))))



 
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Old Feb 7th, 2011, 08:14 AM   4
darkNlovely
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How you are feeling is normal--I understand you just got married and didnt have the chance to just be and enjoy each other. A honeymoon would be great for the both of you before the baby comes. Just consider yourself very lucky as there are many want a baby but have difficulty. I think it would be a good idea to join a prenatal group with other women in your age group, it would be good for you to have the support of other pregnant mothers. I also think your age is perfect for having a first baby



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Old Feb 7th, 2011, 08:22 AM   5
jett
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Old Feb 7th, 2011, 08:22 AM   6
Phantom
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If you want to chat I'm here for you. I've wanted a child for a while now even though I'm only 24, but I am depressed about being pregnant. There are so many things I can't do now and I'm so lonely. I honestly don't believe people who say they love being pregnant. It's just not logical.



 
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Old Feb 7th, 2011, 08:43 AM   7
prdlyexpectng
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i have extremely mixed feelings. the 3 biggest ones are probably: extreme excitement (feeling blessed!), extremely nervous, and actually a little sad. I am excited because I know having a child is the greatest blessing from God, and I thank him everyday that he has blessed me this far. I am really nervous because having a kid is a life changing event, and I am in my early 20's so I know how hard it is going to be for me to switch from slightly immature to parenthood. And lastly, I am a little sad. I'm sad because I'm not married (although I am in a long-term, stable, loving, healthy relationship) and I know I will never get to experience the married life without having a kid (although me and my boyfriend have lived together for awhile). I am also sad that my boyfriend isn't here with me, and won't be until our baby is born. But, I trust that I can get through this with the help of God.



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Old Feb 7th, 2011, 09:03 AM   8
cherryness
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Im 24 and only been married 6 months. I planned my baby but I can still see where you are coming from. I have moments where I think what have I done? Why did I try so early? I didnt get to go on honeymoon, I would have liked to travel etc etc. But I was desperate for a family. I thought about all this before trying and was convinced it'd take ages, and feel very priviledged to have fallen so quickly. While sometimes I think I'm gonna miss out on things Im also going to have the most important thing to me in my life. I would hate to be without a family. So this suits me fine Id give up anything for that. Plus what use is all the travelling etc if I miss out on the best thing of life - family life?

I guess its just so scary when you're still young and have a few things you would like to do w/o a baby. Iv wanted a baby for a year now and now that I'm finally pregnant there is definately a sense of fear, excitement but a sort of sadness at the little things I'll lose out on since I'll be a parent (like being able to chuck on a pair of shoes and go running w/o planning a babysitter etc). I think this is a completely normal feeling to have Dont worry ! We are all going through the same thoughts! Everyone is thinking the same



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Old Feb 7th, 2011, 09:52 AM   9
snj
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yes cherryness...v feel exactly the same.
thanks everyone for sharing similar feelings. I feel lil' better to knw m not the only to feel this way. u knw wenever i used to see kids arnd me i always wished and hoped to have one of my own and had my eyes filled with tears. i knw i want dis...i always wanted this. i hope to overcome these negative thgts soon. you knw whats helping, I look at things i need to get for the baby...all those baby stuff r so adorable...
thanks all again. I just hope this pregnancy goes well till the end. its a risky one since i am diabetic. Hope all does well for everyone here. All da best Ladies.

umm....theres one more thing dats depressing me my husband works in gulf and i am visiting my parents here in India. I found out i was pregnant while i was here. now my doc recommends i stay here throughout my pregnancy and that sucks big time I mean dont u want ur hubby to b der wid u during these days...gosh... i gotta convince my doc for letting me go to him...i so want to b wid him. staying apart just won't do.



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Old Feb 7th, 2011, 10:22 AM   10
victoriav
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Hey I am 34 and been with my husband for 10 years, and I have the "what on earth are we doing" moments. I don't want to share him with anyone else! I've never been to Vietnam! We never did buy that campervan and go round Europe! Then I realised that the things I've got the most out of in life are often the things that start off the most terrifying/overwhelming. And that sacrificing some things means bigger rewards in other areas.

I guess there will always be things you've not done before having kids.

Totally normal to have mixed feelings I reckon.



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