No we're rural, only two hospitals and both are around 20 miles away (another reason why we want DH to stay!)
Poor you, looks like we've exhusted all the options. I guess just tell your mid-wife how strongly you feel (and point out in other areas it wouldn't be an issue as you would be able to pay - NHS postcode lottery!!) and see what suggestions they can make?
Try not to get too anxious if you can as stress is bad for the baby. One thing I learnt from my first is that no birth plan goes to plan and it doesn't normally pan out how you thought it would. I really panicked about staying in overnight too with dd, thought I'd want to be straight out of there, but it really wasn't an unpleasant experience at all, quite the contrary. I had a long (23hrs) birth that had lots of complications and by the end of it dd was born at 5am. DH stayed in the hospital until 9am (I had 2 hours in surgery being repaired) so he was with dd. then he went home to get a couple of hours sleep as it was so draining. Although I did get my own room due to having surgery (and a ward experience might not be as positive as mine) I loved my day and night in there. It was like being in a warm blanket knowing all the help I needed was on hand and people kept coming in and out to wait on me and take care of both of us. The staff couldn't be nicer, and although they are strict on other visitors, they really aren't strict on partners in terms of kicking out. He could arrive at 9am and leave around 9/10pm. They weren't funny about it at all, and was really only doing it so we both got as much rest as possible, which you will need once you're home and all on your own with no one to bring you food and look after you! Please don't be scared about it xx
I'm telling the mw as long as me and baby are well we are not staying in. my son was born at 8pm and we were taken to the ward and my oh was asked to leave at the door which was fair enough except for the fact that other people came in after and there ohs were aloud on the ward to help their partners settle.
I had 2nd degree tear so was in a lot of pain and had asked for help latching baby the boob and didnt get it, the only time i got checked through the night was when i was told i either had to have a wee or have a cathater. They were no help at all, and i would have been so much better of at home where i would have had the support of my oh.
I would have just walked out but was worried about having ss called over me being a bad mum
I had a traumatic 35 hour labour, I was exhausted & when I was told I wasnt allowed to go home (my pulse was high) I sat & sobbed my heart out x I was so upset that I discharged myself - I know some people might think thats stupid but I was no good to my newborn in the state I was in x I went home & Finley was awake pretty much 98% of the night, we had an awful first night but I was so pleased I had help from DH & my family, I would have had to have dealt with that on my own if I had been in hospital
I went to my GP the next day for our 24hr check & the DR checked my pulse & said it was on its way down & that no wonder it was high considering how upset I was in the hospital, he said if I had stayed it probably would never have gone down so hearing that I know I did the right thing x
My biggest fear was my waters breaking, going in to hospital & DH not being able to stay but I was very lucky & DH & my mum stayed the whole 35+ hours, it was just when I got to the ward he wasnt allowed to stay x
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