Hi, I'm new here. I joined because I need some help. I'm 19 yrs old and I'm 1 month pregnant I believe. I already told my boyfriend and he's very happy. But I'm not sure how to tell my mom. Today she got mad and said that if I turned out to be pregnant she would disown me. I'm not sure what to do. I feel like running away but I don't wan to take away her opportunity to see her grandchild. Also, I'm not sure when I should tell her. Any advice??
That's tough. My mom would have been disappointed in me if I got pregnant before I was established. But I don't think lying to her is the way to go. Maybe find a back plan and then tell her. Hope this helps.
I think you should tell her as soon as possible, to give her more time to get used to the idea before baby arrives. I'm sure she won't disown you - once she's had some time to get used to the idea, she will probably be excited. My mum loves being a grandma, she says in some ways it's even better than being a mum. Good luck!
Is she fully supporting you or are you and your bf working? If she's fully supporting you I'd get a job first and show some independence before I tell her. Try to establish some rapport by showing her initiative and responsibility. If you're already doing all that you can then tell her now and make a plan to get your own place with your bf if you're living with her and can financially afford to be on your own. Have some sort of plan going forward that you can discuss with her, it might reassure her doubts about you. I agree with pp that people say mean things when they're stressed or angry, ignore that she said that to you, what's done is done and you can't reverse time. She can, however start treating you more respectfully if you're doing all you can to show you're doing everything in your power to be successful and carve a path.
It'd be shameful for her to not support you if that's what you're trying to do and please be aware that even in the most positive circumstances people will be cruel. My own mother has said nasty things about how she's going to refuse to babysit on occasion, refuse to buy my kids toys, clothing etc, do this that and the next thing for our children even now that I'm 41, fully established, have 2 degrees, gainfully employed (17 years with the same company), happily with my partner for 19 years (married for 10), and own 2 properties. I usually give it 24 hours before I confront her every time she's nasty and tell her how she's hurt my feelings although I'd prefer to use some choice four letter words with her. But being confrontational is not the way to get her to show compassion and get her to support me when clearly she seems to have a problem with that from the get-go! Do what you can to win her over, but realize that it'll be much easier once she sees your beautiful baby in her arms and you might have to put up with some crappy tone until then (I certainly did)!
Any opinions, advice, statements or other information expressed or made available on BabyandBump.Momtastic.com by users or third parties, including but not limited to bloggers, are solely those of the respective user or other third party. They do not reflect the opinions of BabyandBump.Momtastic.com and they have not been reviewed by a physician, psychologist or parenting expert or any member of the BabyandBump.Momtastic.com staff for accuracy, balance or objectivity. Content and other information presented on BabyandBump.Momtastic.com are not a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice, counseling, diagnosis, or treatment. Never delay or disregard seeking professional medical or mental health advice from your physician or other qualified health provider because of something you have read on BabyandBump.Momtastic.com. BabyandBump.Momtastic.com does not endorse any opinion, advice, statement, product, service or treatment made available on the website. If you think you have a medical emergency, call your doctor or emergency services immediately.