BFN girls I'm sooooo sad I just don't know what to think anymore. I have such strong symptoms every month I was convinced I was pregnant this cycle. I feel like it's never going to happen and I don't even know what I want anymore. So many conflisting emotions. Any words of wisdom? I realize it's only been 5 cycles and I know so many of you have struggled, but I never did so I am not dealing with this well. With my first (ended in mc) it took 4 cycles. With Sophie it took 3 cycles. I misleadingly thought it would happen quick for me and now that it's not I just don't know if I want to keep doing this. I sound like a spoiled child don't I? I am going to be 39 in the fall and maybe it's just not meant to be for me. The thought of being pregnant TERRIFIES me and then every month when I am not I am gutted.... I think I'll call my doctor... but I refuse to go on any medication, but maybe my hormone levels are off?
Don't give up!!!! I tried for about 4-5 months before I got pregnant again. There were a couple of times when I thought I was pregnant and then the day I was going to POAS I ended up getting my period. Then, I just decided not to stress about it and just had fun with my hubby any chance we could. But don't stress and start thinking negatively. BTW, I am currently 39 and will be 40 in June so you still have time :-). Hang in there!
Well I'm back but with some trepidation, wondering if I'll open my big mouth and piss someone off again but . . . You can live life in fear of making someone mad or you can just go on knowing its probably going to happen at one time or another...soooooo......
Steph, how are you feeling??? Promise promise promise to get maternity clothes in mail this weekend!!
Angela, how was the beach? I am so jealous as I already miss the water. I love my mountains but feel so land locked sometimes. Hope all is well! Hugs and kisses to the boys. ( your children, not your husband I promise).
Vivienne, we are scheduled for tubes (grommets ) this Friday and I'm soooooo excited! Everyone says what a difference it makes. How are wedding plans going?
Chris, so sorry for the BFN!! It took us two years to get pregnant, countless tests, etc. but even by those numbers we were lucky. I'm with Steph, you still have plenty of time. I had Jo one month before my 40th birthday. If you're really concerned, an easy thing to get tested for is your thyroid. It can affect fertility huge and it's an easy blood test and easy medication to control. Lots of women have trouble with their thyroid, especially as we get older. In the mean time hang in there!! Lots of hugs!!!
AFM, not much new to tell actually. Jo has surgery Friday for the tubes. It's minor, but they do have to put her under so no food or drink 12 hours before and for my little milk hound that will be the real struggle. Mexico was good, although the sick baby was a bit of a downer. I think we took a stomach bug from daycare with us that had her vomiting and gave her diarrhea. She couldn't keep anything down, including her much beloved milk. By Saturday morning she also had a fever of 102 (given our history I took thermometer and Tylenol with us). And I thought that's it were going to the hospital, she's really dehydrated and has a high fever, we're in trouble. Then our maid showed up and she was AWESOME!! On top if having to clean up countless sheets and towels with vomit and diarrhea on them, she told us the hotel had a doctor on call. So we called the concierge and she connected us to his office and he, on a Saturday morning, was in our room in 20 minuets. Plus he spoke English. Turnes out both ears were infected again!! We had just finished the last round of antibiotics the Wednesday before. So four days later we had a double ear infection on top of a nasty stomach bug. He gave her a shot of antibiotics with an anti nausea ( in shot form because she couldn't keep anything down) and came back Sunday morning ( read house call on a Sunday morning!!!) to give her another shot. Rest of the trip he gave us a prescription for an oral antibiotic. So by Monday afternoon she was much better and hell on wheels. We had a good rest of our trip. Looking back I'm not sure if my favorite part was when Jo was vomiting all over the floor by the elevators, there-by making her dad throw up. Or her vomiting all over me, while explosive diarrhea was coming out of the back of her diaper all over me, or when the diaper leaked in the very nice hotel bar and when I looked over and saw Jo standing awkwardly, I realized she had had diarrhea all over the floor. It's truly hard to pick. . . . That's why I wrote the poem, I needed a little comic relief. Anyway, lesson learned is how I see it. I think you should travel with your children, exposing them to the world is a good thing, but be prepared for the worst. . . And take your own diapers . . .
So that's all from here, hope everyone is well, I've missed you. . .
Checking in to see how Jo (and mommy Anna) is doing. Also, hope everyone had a great week and have fun (or relaxing) plans for the weekend. We have a birthday party to go to tomorrow morning and that is about all that we have scheduled for the weekend. Been kind of a quiet week.
I will post more later - but have to get back to the grindstone.
Oh Anna i shouldn't laugh but you are too funny! Poor Jo. Glad your trip ended up better. Amazing medical attention.
Hope her surgery went well. Hopefully all these ear troubles are behind her now.
Now that my hormones have subsided and AF is in full force I'm feeling less sad about the BFN. Just keep swimming just keep swimming. It's bound to happen again. Just didnt think it would take longer than before. Oh naivité.
TGIF all. I'm currently laying on the floor of Sophies room until she falls asleep. This is not our regular routine but she's sick and coughing up a storm and needs her mommy. (Plus she cries bloody murder when I try to leave).
Chris, hope little Sophie is doing better. It's so hard when they're sick. Is she in a crib or a toddler bed? And as for our trip,humor became the only way to handle it because reality was just too much. Lessons learned. Hugs to your little, hope she feels better soon!
Steph, HA, and everyone else, thanks for asking, Jo is much better. By that afternoon she was almost back to herself. Crazy how quickly they recover. Fingers crossed this does the trick. When I was searching google for info about the procedure I stumbled across all these stories of kids still suffering from multiple ear infections even with tubes. I know I should know better, google is the worst place ever, but couldn't help it.
Well, it is a true Monday. I'm not going to dwell on this but I spent the weekend at my parent's house in the mountains after a ridiculous fight with DH. I say ridiculous because he blew up at nothing and it was the last straw. Anyway, it is what it is, but I may now be starring being a single mom in the face. So back to Monday, had a little too much wine last night (escapism) and woke up at 3am with terrible headache. Just when I was falling asleep Jo got up at 4:45 and wouldn't go back down. So after lounging around house this morning, I was getting ready to bundle up, put Jo in the backpack and take the dog for a walk before I had to go to work all day, and a fox runs through the yard. My crazy dog jumps off a second story balcony(with out his collar) after the fox. So I hurry up and get us both dressed and loaded up and we spend all morning (an hour and a half) out walking the trails and streets of our neighborhood. Finally head back to the house and I look across the street one last time and there he is, head hung, sauntering back home. He smells AWEFUL!!! I think he rolled in elk or moose dung. Needless to say I was half an hour late to work, and had no store key because Jo was playing with my keys and now I can't find them.
Ok lament over. Jo is doing well, although really clingy, not sure if its the home situation or just having an off day.
Anna, step away from the google!! I'm sure I've mentioned this on here before, but my nephew had tubes put in at some point and was a different kid afterward. When they fell out he went back to constant ear infections so they put another set in, and after they fell out he was fine. I really hope this makes a difference for little Jo - it's hard on all of you when she's sick so often!
As for the marriage, can I suggest you call your counselor? Even if you're no longer seeing her regularly, this definitely warrants a phone call - this is what she's there for....
Huge hugs - and I hope this week gets better for you.
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