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Old May 8th, 2013, 19:42 PM   11
Amsan
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pola17 View Post
here, a feel good song!
Thank you! I love that song
And thanks everyone else too. I have my gender reveal Monday then another appointment with my regular doctor after that. Unfortunately I think these are the two appointments the child's father is ACTUALLY going to so idk how I'm gonna tell my doctor that he's the reason I'm so depressed half the time when he's sitting there lol.



 
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Old May 8th, 2013, 19:48 PM   12
pola17
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my sis also had a similar problem like yours... now my nephew is 6 years old, and she´s such a strong person, I admire her so much!!!
Depending on how delicate the situation with FOB is, you can actually open up and let him know how this whole situation affects you!

Gender reveal is so much fun!!



 
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Old May 8th, 2013, 20:24 PM   13
Amsan
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He's an asshole who can do no wrong and will turn the whole thing around to make me feel guilty and like an idiot if I open up. Any time I have ever opened up about how I feel to him I'm always just being a big baby and over reacting or I'm a dumb ass.

Mom came home slamming shit around and went straight to pouring herself a drink. I apologized because I had remembered telling her she could use the rest of it. She ignored me. I asked her if she heard me she said yep. I said I was sorry again she said okay.

Which of course lead to another episode. I stormed out and caved and bought another stupid pack of smokes. I only smoked a half one before feeling guilty and throwing it out.

I just don't know if I can do any of this.



 
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Old May 8th, 2013, 20:50 PM   14
pola17
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Hun, reading more into this, your situation in tough!
Is there a friend who can share their apartment with you and LO? You don't need that stress!!

It will be alright!



 
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Old May 8th, 2013, 21:26 PM   15
Amsan
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Nope :-/ And just tried confiding in my sister, and got a "feeling sorry for yourself and being depressed isn't going to help you or baby". Thank you captain f'ing obvious like I don't already feel horrible enough that I can't even be strong enough for this baby. I'd love to be happy. I'd love to be care free. I'd love to enjoy this pregnancy and bond with my baby and I can't do that and I feel terrible.



 
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Old May 8th, 2013, 21:39 PM   16
pola17
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sorry your sis didn't sound supportive!
Will you be able to move by yourself? Perhaps FOB can help financially?




 
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Old May 8th, 2013, 21:41 PM   17
Amsan
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Nope. I traded my car in exactly one month before finding out I was pregnant (even though its a much better suited car to haul a baby in), but unfortunately with that my payment ALSO went up every month. So unless I get a second and third job, I don't see that happening.

And I'm pretty sure if FOB and I moved in together, we'd end up on the next episode of Snapped.



 
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Old May 8th, 2013, 21:51 PM   18
pola17
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I see!!! I guess all you've got is to hang in there until you can move! Don't worry about bonding, it will happen!

I hope things get better for you sooner than later!



 
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Old May 9th, 2013, 09:50 AM   19
Amsan
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Thank you. This baby just deserves the best and I don't feel like I'm giving it right now...



 
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Old May 9th, 2013, 10:08 AM   20
Rainstorm
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Hey, your baby chose you as his/her mother for a reason. So far, everything baby needs you are providing, and the fact that you were able to put the cigarette out shows you're trying really hard and so far succeeding. Don't be so hard on yourself, and vent all you need, there will always be women here who can walk you through this. Don't lose hope



 
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