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Old Jun 11th, 2018, 07:46 AM   1
Pregnant (Expecting)
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Best Friend Blowing Off My First Baby Shower??

So not sure if I'm just emotional thanks to hormones but I'm feeling really hurt.

Anyway I'm pregnant with my first and told my best friend since Kindergarten/Maid of Honor right away, wanting her to be one of the first to know. I told her to keep her schedule open for June-July because that's around the time we'd have the baby shower. She acted ecstatic and said she wouldn't miss it.

Well I finally set a date in July and let her know, and she tells me she won't be attending because she has comic-con passes. I asked if she could stop by after, because I've been to comic-con and we only stayed a total of three to four hours. I know some people like to stay all day and get their money's worth, but she goes every single year and I can't believe she'd blow off my first baby shower for something she attends annually! She told me no, she plans on being there all day, and maybe she'll try to stop by late at night after but she's not sure.

It might just be hormones but I'm feeling really bummed about it. Like I said, it's my first, she is my oldest friend/Maid of Honor, and she goes to comic-con every year, and I know if she really wanted to make it work she'd go for maybe half a day and still try to make the shower. Bums me out because I have family driving from out of town to be there, meanwhile this friend lives literally down the street from my parents' house, which is where the shower is being held. I can't change the date as invitations have already been printed and we've arranged the date to make sure it works for out of town family members to attend.

Am I overreacting by being upset? I was very diplomatic and told her I sincerely hope to see her anyway, but not sure if it's even worth mentioning to her that it hurt my feelings.

Thanks in advance!

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Old Jun 11th, 2018, 08:47 AM   2
Mum (Mom)
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I would be bummed as well, especially as it being your first!
I remember my SIL and Best friends throwing me a shower and 2 of my oldest and closest friends couldn't make it with no valid excuse!
If I remember rightly them being absent wasnt even a big deal - I still had a blast with all of my friends and they are the ones who missed out!

Have a fab day xxxx

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Old Jun 11th, 2018, 09:04 AM   3
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I would feel the same hun and I don't understand her motives as ive never been to comicon but just try to have an amazing time she will miss out on some special memories for you but maybe you could do something together when she is free

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Old Jun 11th, 2018, 11:55 AM   4
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I feel for you, comicon is fun but its not the be all and end all, it wouldn't kill her to miss half a day. Maybe tell her your bummed and ask if you could go out to lunch another day and have a mini shower to make up?

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Old Jun 12th, 2018, 22:20 PM   5
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Is it possible she’s jealous? Maybe TTC? I know when DH and I were TTC I had a family member who got pregnant several months before us, and even though I was happy for her I found it impossible to be around her without feeling so emotional. I don’t know if your friend is married/in a relationship, but maybe she’s feeling down about it and doesn’t want to spoil your day.

Either way I’m sure you’ll have an awesome shower, but it sounds like maybe your friend has another reason for not going. I hope things all work out!!

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Old Jun 13th, 2018, 03:01 AM   6
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Baby showers aren't for everybody sadly, what a shame it coincided with the event. I do remember before I had children listening to other people talk about babies and children literally put me to sleep so I think I would have been heading to the comiccon also. I'm sure it will still be a great day without her x

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Old Jul 9th, 2018, 14:24 PM   7
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If she bought the tickets before you announced the date of the shower, it's an unfortunate coincidence.

Unfortunately some people can't just block off two months(ish) worth of time.. I am working with my bridesmaids to nail a mutually beneficial date ahead of time since my schedule is a nightmare..

It stinks but I'd say you could probably celebrate separately by going to brunch or something with your friend. I bet it's just the hormones speaking.

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Old Aug 3rd, 2018, 14:15 PM   8
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Yeah she's already bought the tickets she's not going to cut it short when she's busy. That's kind of unreasonable to expect. Some events people can't make and that's just that regardless of who they are to you. I've never been given a baby shower for any of my 5 nor will I get one this time. It's just life, me and my husband are having a child, no one else. Sorry honey x

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Old Aug 4th, 2018, 09:51 AM   9
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Did you expect her not to make any plans for all of June or July?

That is not a reasonable expectation.

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Old Aug 8th, 2018, 16:47 PM   10
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I can completely understand your being upset at your BFF missing your shower - that's got to hurt

But, if you already knew she attended ComiCon every year, then you knew she wouldn't be able to make the baby shower. Perhaps you could have scheduled it at a time when you knew she could attend, since she annually attends this specific event.

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