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Old Sep 22nd, 2011, 08:45 AM   1
Fruitmash
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Worst. Anniversary. EVER


Today is my OH's and my 3 year anniversary. We're flat broke preparing for baby so decided awhile ago not to do anything or buy anything. It sucks in a way because it feels like we aren't celebrating but it's a small price to pay for Harlee-Quinn to get the things she needs.
Before I found out the gender of our princess, we made it clear to everyone we knew that it was unacceptable for them to tell anyone, it was our news etc and they haven't a right blah blah blah. Found out today that the same "friend" who outed my pregnancy at 5 weeks (like I didn't have enough to worry about then) has also told atleast two people we're having a girl. Her excuse the first time was she didn't know she wasn't supposed to say anything. I thought it goes without saying but obviously not. So I made it so SO clear that she isn't to tell anyone at all. It ruined the telling people thing when she did that so she couldn't do this too. And of course she did. When I confronted her about it, she said "well everyone knows!!" 2 points.
1) If "everyone" knew, she wouldn't need to tell anyone.
2) Everyone knew because OH and I told them.
I said the usual, it hurt, it was unfair, it wasn't alright and she wouldn't even apologize. Just walked off. LAST STRAW. Supposed to be my best friend and she's that spiteful. I want nothing to do with her, and have cast her off my guest list for my baby shower. I want nothing to do with someone that poisonous.
Even worse, our Hamster Godzilla died last night. He was 2 and a half which is a good life, but it hurts so much. Dean bought him for me because someone else died, and he was perfect. Chubby, loved cuddles, playful, never bit, peed on my brother (funniest thing) and now he's gone. And I feel so bad because he's been dying for awhile, and I couldn't help. I didn't want to put him down on the off chance he would survive. And he didn't so I made him suffer for nothing. I found out at work, Dean is a terrible liar. He covered him in bedding so I couldn't see, but I know he's gone and I never knew I'd be this upset over a Hamster. But I love him, he was my baby. Knew where his treats were and would beg at the bars for them. Never again.
I got home and started fixing up his box. He could atleast be comfortable in death. I put sawdust and bedding in, dug a hole for him to fit in, put a small Swallow charm in there, with some food and his treats, and even sprayed alittle of Dean's aftershave and my favourite perfume in it. Last of my perfume but it seemed better to put it in there than wear it. Dean's going to bury him tonight. I know it's only a Hamster, but he saw me through all of my granparents dying, realising my dad didn't care etc. And I really want a new Hamster on one hand, not to replace him, but to keep me preoccupied. Give me something to look after and hold until Harlee-Quinn comes. But part of me really doesn't want to deal with having to train it up.
Sorry for the rant, but thanks for letting me vent



 
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Old Sep 22nd, 2011, 08:54 AM   2
hoptingfor3
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Didn't want to R&R.....



 
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Old Sep 22nd, 2011, 08:56 AM   3
bababel
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I am so sorry to hear about all of this, and on your anniversary too. I can relate to all of it, unfortunately. Someone in my family spilled the beans about my baby being a boy to a cousin in law of mine. She casually emailed me and said "by the way, I know it's a boy! Somebody told me!" and I was sooooo pissed. I asked her who told her and she ignored the question. It's one thing to know, but it's another to rub it in my face that you know. I wish I hadn't been told that. So much for THAT surprise.

Also, I know how hard it must be to lose a hamster. I've never owned one, but my husband and I have pet rats and they mean EVERYTHING to us. I dread the day when I find one or both of them dead. I know my husband and I will cry for days. We have already cried just thinking about the day when they will be gone and it it too much for us. They are almost two years old now and they will probably live the same length as your hamster did. (By the way, your hamster DID live a long life. That is an excellent amount of time for a hamster! You must have treated him well!) But there is no shame in admitting heartbreak over any creature great or small. We can love them like we love any person.

I am sorry for your loss. I hope you find comfort. RIP Godzilla.



 
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Old Sep 22nd, 2011, 09:02 AM   4
Fruitmash
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Originally Posted by bababel View Post
I am so sorry to hear about all of this, and on your anniversary too. I can relate to all of it, unfortunately. Someone in my family spilled the beans about my baby being a boy to a cousin in law of mine. She casually emailed me and said "by the way, I know it's a boy! Somebody told me!" and I was sooooo pissed. I asked her who told her and she ignored the question. It's one thing to know, but it's another to rub it in my face that you know. I wish I hadn't been told that. So much for THAT surprise.

Also, I know how hard it must be to lose a hamster. I've never owned one, but my husband and I have pet rats and they mean EVERYTHING to us. I dread the day when I find one or both of them dead. I know my husband and I will cry for days. We have already cried just thinking about the day when they will be gone and it it too much for us. They are almost two years old now and they will probably live the same length as your hamster did. (By the way, your hamster DID live a long life. That is an excellent amount of time for a hamster! You must have treated him well!) But there is no shame in admitting heartbreak over any creature great or small. We can love them like we love any person.

I am sorry for your loss. I hope you find comfort. RIP Godzilla.
Thank you so much, it's nice to know that someone doesn't think I'm over-reacting on these things, makes me feel alittle better. And it means alot that you feel for your rats like I feel for Godzilla. He's the best present I ever got, and I am glad that he lived a long life. He was our baby. We told some people at work and I got "are you sure he's not hibernating??" or "It's okay, buy another one". They don't get it. If your friend died, you'd know they'd died, they weren't sleeping. And I want another Hamster, but it's not going to replace Godzilla. Told my mum, and she said "throw him in an old margerine tub and put him out for the bin men." Think I'd rather bury him. Thank you again



 
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Old Sep 22nd, 2011, 09:03 AM   5
Mindy_mini
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Oh Hun!

Anniversaries aren't about what you buy or what you do, it's about remembering the happy years past and to come. We often just watch a movie on tv and for a treat we might share a takeaway.

As for your hampster, I totally get you on this one. I had a hampster a few years ago and when we had to have him put down, I cried for days. Dh cried, my dad - a 56yr old man cried. They are part of the family, it's normal to feel like this. Remember him chewin the bars and peeing on your bro. I always remember mine for sharing my dads brazil nuts and using his paws and teeth to get the lid of his treat box then tipping it over to eat the contents!



 
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Old Sep 22nd, 2011, 09:14 AM   6
Kristin52
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I'm sorry I don't really know what to say, except things will get better and I'll be sending you hugs xx



 
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Old Sep 22nd, 2011, 09:16 AM   7
Gretaa
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I'm so sorry dear, about the friend - friends like this aren't worth telling anything. You can be distant 'I KNOW YOU, YOU KNOW ME' friends alike, but if she did it once, she'll probably do it again.
Hamster...mine died couple years ago, everyone in our family cried as they were very close to it. She was our little girl :} bought on international women's day. Died less than two years after, she, just like yours, was suffering for a while, was loosing her hair, we had a feeling that it's her last breaths but it was still very hurtful and painful. Never again I'm buying a hamster or anything else that dies so quick. It's enough time to get used to it, not enough time to get enough of it. If i was you, i wouldn't buy this other hamster - it won't be the same as that, and it'll die eventually, giving you another heartache.
Take care!



 
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Old Sep 22nd, 2011, 09:18 AM   8
Wallflower
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Aww Fruitmash I am so sorry to hear about Godzilla it's so sad when your pets die, they are your family.

I've had lots of hamsters and loved them all, they have their own personalities don't they. I agree that it's a really good age but doens't make you feel any better at this time as you want them to live forever! We've got a house rabbit who's 6, don't know what we'd do without him...

And as for your friend, it doesn't sounds like she appreciates how important it is for you to be the ones to share your exciting news with people. I hope she comes to her senses and apologises!

I hope you and OH can try and have a nice evening together. Happy Anniversary! Who needs presents? You have the biggest one of your lives on it's way

xx



 
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Old Sep 22nd, 2011, 09:18 AM   9
bababel
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fruitmash View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by bababel View Post
I am so sorry to hear about all of this, and on your anniversary too. I can relate to all of it, unfortunately. Someone in my family spilled the beans about my baby being a boy to a cousin in law of mine. She casually emailed me and said "by the way, I know it's a boy! Somebody told me!" and I was sooooo pissed. I asked her who told her and she ignored the question. It's one thing to know, but it's another to rub it in my face that you know. I wish I hadn't been told that. So much for THAT surprise.

Also, I know how hard it must be to lose a hamster. I've never owned one, but my husband and I have pet rats and they mean EVERYTHING to us. I dread the day when I find one or both of them dead. I know my husband and I will cry for days. We have already cried just thinking about the day when they will be gone and it it too much for us. They are almost two years old now and they will probably live the same length as your hamster did. (By the way, your hamster DID live a long life. That is an excellent amount of time for a hamster! You must have treated him well!) But there is no shame in admitting heartbreak over any creature great or small. We can love them like we love any person.

I am sorry for your loss. I hope you find comfort. RIP Godzilla.
Thank you so much, it's nice to know that someone doesn't think I'm over-reacting on these things, makes me feel alittle better. And it means alot that you feel for your rats like I feel for Godzilla. He's the best present I ever got, and I am glad that he lived a long life. He was our baby. We told some people at work and I got "are you sure he's not hibernating??" or "It's okay, buy another one". They don't get it. If your friend died, you'd know they'd died, they weren't sleeping. And I want another Hamster, but it's not going to replace Godzilla. Told my mum, and she said "throw him in an old margerine tub and put him out for the bin men." Think I'd rather bury him. Thank you again
You are DEFINITELY not overreacting. Animals are our babies! My family doesn't get it either. Feel better knowing that other people sympathize with you, even if others don't. Bury him, say some final words and frame a picture of him to hang in your house. It's the best you can do.



 
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Old Sep 22nd, 2011, 09:24 AM   10
oox_tasha_xoo
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first off, happy anniversary second, im really sorry about your best friend! sometimes it really is best not to tell ANYONE no matter how much you trust them!
And im so sorry to hear about your hamster.. iv had 4 hamsters , 2 gerbils, and 2 rats and iv cried at all of their deaths, they really are lovely animals... hope you feel better soon xx



 
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