Hi everyone,

I know I am not the only one with stress and problems, but it is just all getting on top of me just now and really need to let it out to someone.

My husband has been my rock in recent months and so supportive, but I just feel like all I do these days is moan and be a mope

I am 22 weeks pregnant, due on 14th August, and before I got pregnant with this one, I lost 2 pregnancies to miscarriage at 5 weeks both times last year. Although they were very early losses, I can still remember the devastation and the disappointment, and the insensitive comments made by some people I considered close friends and family at the time (an example was: "it wasn't like it was an actual baby you lost"!). Even though I am now at 22 weeks and I know pregnancy is a worrying time for anyone, whether they have had a loss or losses, or not, the worry just never goes away. This pregnancy hasn't been easy, I've had lots of bad cramping not dissimilar to miscarriage cramping, and non stop UTIs and vaginal infections. I have also been experiencing sore stabbing pains in my vagina which I ended up in hospital for last week for a day (they couldn't find anything wrong, though still waiting on swab results coming back). Some days I am better than others, and I think today has been a particular bad day which hasn't helped. There are days where I just want to cry and think I am going to lose my mind I am so anxious and stressed (which I know isn't any good for the baby but I can't help it). Today, I've also had quite bad cramping which is making me feel like crap.

I have spoken to my GP about how I feel but all she said was that she can't give me anything for it at the moment because of the pregnancy, which I understand, but she didn't really say much else.

Also, I am stressed with work at the moment. I work in a small office where my boss and colleagues are all married to their work and if I work 9-5 and no more, I feel lazy and uncommitted. They all work through weekends and public holidays, don't use their annual leave, and work late most nights. Tiny things are blown into massive issues in there and I seriously am struggling with the level of intensity and drama. I am not lazy, I just have a life outside my work and without sounding slack, I do have other things on my mind at the moment and get tired easily so enjoy my free time in the evenings.

Thanks for listening to my moan, I just needed to sound off to someone

I didnt want to Read and run but I just wanted to give you big . I know pregnancy can be a stressful time and some days you just want to scream. Your lucky to have such a supportive husband to hold you up. Things will get better once you can hold that baby in your arms, all your worry will go away (but soon be replaced with a different kind of worry)

Keep your head high!!!

Hey shirlls, I'm sorry you're having such a hard time I feel sorry for people with difficult pregnancy's as it is hard enough as it is. If I was you first and foremost I wouldn't worry about feeling lazy or uncommitted as working 9-5 when pregnant is challenging enough. Don't compare yourself to work mates as they probably aren't going through such a hard time as you, could you maybe have a chat with your manager about how you are feeling? It could have a pleasant outcome for you and take the pressure off a bit at work.

To get you through try and think of the positives, like how you are more than halfway through, and how soon you will be off on paid maternity leave and work will be a distant memory! Hope things start looking up for you

I understand how scary it is being pregnant after a mc. Every little cramp makes you think it's over. I take it day by day but some days have been so hard and my family just thinks I'm overreacting.
As for work, I'm the same. 8-430 and I'm headed home. I don't go weekends and I use my vacation time. So I know how you feel. If work stress is too much consider looking for something else.
Good luck and hugs.

Thank you both so much for your kind replies . Even just after writing it all down has made me feel better.

Leahtaba, thanks for your advice, and it could be worth a go speaking to my manager, the thing that has put me off a little up til now is that I sometimes feel that she won't understand as she doesn't have any work life balance at all. But I'll definitely give it a go.

xxxx

you never know until you try though, she might pleasantly surprise you, and if not, no harm done! Best of luck with it! & i'm glad writing it down helped, I always come on here for a moan when i'm feeling crappy, really does work wonders

Being pregnant is hard! I know most of us chose to be and are thrilled about it, but it's still tough. Just know that you're not alone - there are many of us on this board who feel the same way as you.

I relate to you the most when it comes to your paragraph about work (I bolded it). I work in the EXACT same work environment. They all work late, there are always evening events we're expected to go to, no one has kids and are in different stages of life than me, etc, etc! I completely sympathize with you on this.

Just wanted to say the bold part of the post applies to me too! Small legal office and when I am getting ready to go at 5 cause I'm exhausted I get the 'oh are you leaving now?' Comments... Really crap

My boss has kids but really seems to prefer to stay in the office. I just told him recently that even working 9-5 has me so exhausted that when I get home I lie and snooze on the couch with my jacket on before being able to do anything else. So this was true every day in 1st tri but not true for me every day in 2nd tri but I have no qualms making it worse than it is to shut him up.

My advice would be to have a general word as to how generally exhausting you find day to day things and don't be afraid to increase the yawns and belly and back rubbings you do in front of them to drive the point home!

Joy x

Aw I feel the same Hun I had 2 m/c then I had bleed this time on few occasions all being ok but causing me to stress and worry. I have a stressful job being manager of a team were I have had to motivate them everyday when I needed motivating myself, I never showed them how tired I was it was killing at times. Only only that I have 2 sons who are being rip bags lol. I have had a kidney infection, chest infection and a throat infection. Hubby has loads on at work as his job is being withdrawn after re-structure in company happening so fingers crossed he has the new role. Then to top it off fell down the blinking stairs today..... All ok!!!

Someone up there give me a break... Lol!!

Big hugs xxx

Aww I know what you mean about work, but thinking of how worried you are about your baby and how much stress you're under you should try not to let work get to you too much, you certainly shouldn't feel guilty because others are married to their jobs. You and your baby matter more than a job. Keep telling yourself that every time unreasonable demands are made on you and I'd have a word with your manager. Did you get a risk assessment done? Maybe they need to become a little more aware of your needs.