Alot of women struggle with weight gain in pregnancy
If you don't over gain you will loose it very quickly (especially if you plan to breastfeed as it burns 500 calories a day and shrinks your uterus back faster)
you would be suprised with how fast you can go back down. I'm amazed when I look at end of pregnancy photos and my now photos. You would never think I had a baby. So don't think it will ruin your body

I know exactly how you feel. For two years (up until the couple of months before I got pregnant), I was dealing with an eating disorder. I was restricting pretty severely and over-exercising. My lowest weight was 104 (right at underweight, I'm short) but by the time I got pregnant, I had already gotten back up to 115.

During my first trimester and into my second, I was pretty much eating everything in sight. I think all of my previous restricting caught up with me and my body just needed the nutrition. I had denied myself food for so long that I went wild.

Now that I'm at 24 weeks, I have been exercising regularly for the past month or so (mostly just running and now that I'm bigger, walking). I also have stopped eating junk food and eating out at restaurants in the past couple of weeks.

Overall, I've gained a ton of weight. About thirty pounds. It's been difficult and every time I visit the doctor, I'm afraid the nurse is going to mention my weight gain. I would be so humiliated. But I'm also learning to let go of some of my body issues because I know that Lily's development is much more important than my disorder.

I also plan to breastfeed and train for a marathon (with my husband) once the baby is born. It's helpful to know that the weight gain is not permanent.

I'm at that point where I am feeling a bit uncomfortable in my skin. I am just focussing on not dropping the ball and giving in to every desire to eat. I just want to gain a healthy amount.

I can definitely relate. I consider myself "tentatively healed from eating disorders." I've struggled with bingeing, anorexia, over-exercising, you name it. Everything terrible for you, I've done it.

I've found I have good days and bad days with how I feel. It's hard to eat more than I usually do and I've been ordered to eat more at my 20 week appointment. I'm counting my calories now and working hard to focus on eating enough for my baby. If I ever don't want to eat extra, I think of him and how he needs it to be a healthy, happy baby.

But there's a lot of bad days, too. I try not to over-exercise because otherwise I'll slip back into old habits and I'm scared to do so. I have 5 lbs weights with me in my dorm room and I use those for my arms and I do squats and lunges for my legs. I walk most days of the week outside and try to enjoy it more than simply getting "exercise."

When I struggle with my body, I think of my baby. That helps me more than anything.

I'm rambling but I wanted to say you're not alone.