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Old Oct 28th, 2017, 09:23 AM   21
laila 44
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I have to be honest, I hate the newborn phase. For me there is literally nothing fun about it. Filled with stress, anxiety, exhaustion, looking your absolute worst, smelling of baby spit up and breast milk constantly! Not many rewarding moments during this time. Aside from snuggling with baby, I donít enjoy one bit of it and definitely donít miss those days!!! My kids are now 6,4 and 18 months and I loveeeeee it!!! It definitely passes hang in there!!!



 
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Old Oct 28th, 2017, 21:42 PM   22
twinkie2
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Originally Posted by laila 44 View Post
I have to be honest, I hate the newborn phase. For me there is literally nothing fun about it. Filled with stress, anxiety, exhaustion, looking your absolute worst, smelling of baby spit up and breast milk constantly! Not many rewarding moments during this time. Aside from snuggling with baby, I donít enjoy one bit of it and definitely donít miss those days!!! My kids are now 6,4 and 18 months and I loveeeeee it!!! It definitely passes hang in there!!!
This exactly! I despite the newborn phase Until about 6 months it just sucked...trying to mentally prepare for this next go round but honestly it gives me anxiety even thinking about it!



 
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Old Oct 29th, 2017, 12:32 PM   23
swedengirl
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Thank you for this! I am a FTM and due in December. I am just wondering if you have any tips/advice etc for trying to get through those first few weeks/months? Or is that the point that not much can really help, you just have to pray for an easy baby and if not grin and bear it?



 
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Old Oct 29th, 2017, 19:21 PM   24
itsnowmyturn
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I am doing this all again right now and with my 2 year 10 month old toddler!! The second time round is sooo much tougher, it's like your expected to carry on with your old life and slot the baby in. The pain and suffering post birth and the trying to figure out your new baby is waaaay down on the priority list. My boy is 2 and a half weeks old and I have only left the house twice and he has only left the house once!! Between sleep deprivation, feeding a toddler, getting a toddler to nap and feeding a newborn I'm amazed that some days all 3 of us even end up dressed!! Thankfully daughter goes to nursery 2 days a week so that will be my down time and oh takes her on his way to work so I don't need to get up to take her!!

People who go through this again after experiencing it on their second child are crazy lol



 
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Old Oct 29th, 2017, 19:38 PM   25
MEPride
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Thank you for this! I am a FTM and due in December. I am just wondering if you have any tips/advice etc for trying to get through those first few weeks/months? Or is that the point that not much can really help, you just have to pray for an easy baby and if not grin and bear it?
There are really no advice to give other than just go with the flow and realize that nothing will truly prepare you.

But I can say that the one thing that really helped keep my sanity in the early weeks is doing 'shifts' with DH. Meaning, every evening when the sun went down DH would take our daughter and I would go sleep.. whether it's 45 minutes or 3 hours. He'd wake me when she needed to eat. DH would also take her first thing in the morning for a similar amount of time so I could sleep. DH also took 2 weeks off of work which allowed him to take her for a shift in the afternoon.

Also, I recommend getting out of the house at least once a day when you feel ready for it. I had a c section and was out of the house 3 days after returning home. It's easy to feel isolated and alone (especially in the winter) so getting out is important!



 
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Old Oct 29th, 2017, 19:56 PM   26
Palladium
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Quote:
Originally Posted by swedengirl View Post
Thank you for this! I am a FTM and due in December. I am just wondering if you have any tips/advice etc for trying to get through those first few weeks/months? Or is that the point that not much can really help, you just have to pray for an easy baby and if not grin and bear it?
There are really no advice to give other than just go with the flow and realize that nothing will truly prepare you.

But I can say that the one thing that really helped keep my sanity in the early weeks is doing 'shifts' with DH. Meaning, every evening when the sun went down DH would take our daughter and I would go sleep.. whether it's 45 minutes or 3 hours. He'd wake me when she needed to eat. DH would also take her first thing in the morning for a similar amount of time so I could sleep. DH also took 2 weeks off of work which allowed him to take her for a shift in the afternoon.

Also, I recommend getting out of the house at least once a day when you feel ready for it. I had a c section and was out of the house 3 days after returning home. It's easy to feel isolated and alone (especially in the winter) so getting out is important!
This is good advice. I'd also add to ask for help when you need it, even if it's just getting a friend to do a load of washing for you. You need to take care of yourself as much as the baby, so don't be afraid to ask your family and friends to help out whenever you can.

My DD1 will be 2.5 when DD2 is born, which I know is going to be difficult as she's very attached to me, so I'm very glad that this time around my mum and sister live nearby to help me out!



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Old Oct 29th, 2017, 22:40 PM   27
laila 44
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Originally Posted by swedengirl View Post
Thank you for this! I am a FTM and due in December. I am just wondering if you have any tips/advice etc for trying to get through those first few weeks/months? Or is that the point that not much can really help, you just have to pray for an easy baby and if not grin and bear it?
The one golden piece of advice that I wish someone had given me is: nothing is permanent!!! It is all super temporary no matter how tired and how shitty those first 3 months are, just remember it shall pass and baby will grow literally overnight and those days will be behind you. Yes you will get your life back, yes u will sleep again and yes routines will come Into play And baby will sleep a full night, eventually. You will feel like the ground has fallen from under you for a while but hang on, this too shall pass



 
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Old Oct 30th, 2017, 04:21 AM   28
swedengirl
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Thanks for all the above tips!



 
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Old Oct 30th, 2017, 13:40 PM   29
Bonnie11
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Originally Posted by swedengirl View Post
Thank you for this! I am a FTM and due in December. I am just wondering if you have any tips/advice etc for trying to get through those first few weeks/months? Or is that the point that not much can really help, you just have to pray for an easy baby and if not grin and bear it?
Wing it! No one knows what they're doing first time around, if only you could have the knowledge of the second child when it's your first! Nothing and no one can prepare you, it's a total bomb going off in your life. As everyone says, nothing is permanent. Everything is a phase so no matter how hard any big is it won't last forever. Don't worry about what other people are doing/telling you to do. Trust your instincts. Sleep deprivation is a killer, sleep when you can and accept all help that's offered! Babies are all different. Mine was so easy and it was still really hard! Some babies cry lots, some sleep lots... there's no telling what you will get! But after all look after yourself, if it means baby having a bottle while you sleep for a few hours or go out somewhere by yourself then so be it. I've seen so many parents near kill themselves because of what they 'should' be doing when actually ththey only thing that is important is that mum is happy. Happy mum = happy baby! X



 
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Old Oct 30th, 2017, 15:01 PM   30
krissie328
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A lot of good advice here. I also think just taking any help when people offer it. I didn't do that with my son and I was so stressed trying to sort it all and not taking care of myself. The first time I left him to go grocery shopping went a long ways to my mental health.



 
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