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Old Dec 27th, 2017, 19:10 PM   11
mayb_baby
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The boys go to MIL. No way will I have her here when I'm in labour. I don't like or trust her for one (long history between her and I) and she's a pain in the ass I can do without.
Why would you let her have them then if you don't trust her? I'd be fuming if someone expected me to watch their kids but felt this way about me.



 
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Old Dec 27th, 2017, 20:26 PM   12
WackyMumof2
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Originally Posted by WackyMumof2 View Post
The boys go to MIL. No way will I have her here when I'm in labour. I don't like or trust her for one (long history between her and I) and she's a pain in the ass I can do without.
Why would you let her have them then if you don't trust her? I'd be fuming if someone expected me to watch their kids but felt this way about me.
As I said, LONG history between her and I and I don't think this post is the right place to go into detail. But she doesn't like me because I won't 'conform' to what she expects and she HATES that she can't control me and I speak my mind. I don't take shit from anyone. But that is between her and I and not my partner and children. Honestly, she's fantastic with the kids and does a heck of a lot for them and to help out if need be. So, in some strange way, regardless of our differences, it's a situation we keep between ourselves, we don't do a lot of communication and we give each other plenty of space. We don't let it impact on the kids. I don't speak bad of her to them, her vice versa. In saying that, I won't go into her home without my other half, I won't create small talk or give advice even if I think she needs it and I won't sit down to have a cuppa with her either. I honestly don't feel like I should have to. So there is some common ground but only because she's had one heck of a warning from hubby a few years ago that if she doesn't sort her shit with me or put it aside, we will have a Court order making sure she never sees them again.



 
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Old Dec 27th, 2017, 20:47 PM   13
mayb_baby
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The boys go to MIL. No way will I have her here when I'm in labour. I don't like or trust her for one (long history between her and I) and she's a pain in the ass I can do without.
Why would you let her have them then if you don't trust her? I'd be fuming if someone expected me to watch their kids but felt this way about me.
As I said, LONG history between her and I and I don't think this post is the right place to go into detail. But she doesn't like me because I won't 'conform' to what she expects and she HATES that she can't control me and I speak my mind. I don't take shit from anyone. But that is between her and I and not my partner and children. Honestly, she's fantastic with the kids and does a heck of a lot for them and to help out if need be. So, in some strange way, regardless of our differences, it's a situation we keep between ourselves, we don't do a lot of communication and we give each other plenty of space. We don't let it impact on the kids. I don't speak bad of her to them, her vice versa. In saying that, I won't go into her home without my other half, I won't create small talk or give advice even if I think she needs it and I won't sit down to have a cuppa with her either. I honestly don't feel like I should have to. So there is some common ground but only because she's had one heck of a warning from hubby a few years ago that if she doesn't sort her shit with me or put it aside, we will have a Court order making sure she never sees them again.
Obviously I don't know what's happened here but I wouldn't be comfortable with disliking and not trusting a woman this much and leaving her with my kids. My MIL hates that her son has to help around the house and share the household chores. She hates if I don't make dinner and I know she judges my home but I respect her as she cares about us all.
Is there no one else you could ask that would make you feel comfortable xx



 
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Old Dec 27th, 2017, 21:01 PM   14
WackyMumof2
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Originally Posted by WackyMumof2 View Post
The boys go to MIL. No way will I have her here when I'm in labour. I don't like or trust her for one (long history between her and I) and she's a pain in the ass I can do without.
Why would you let her have them then if you don't trust her? I'd be fuming if someone expected me to watch their kids but felt this way about me.
As I said, LONG history between her and I and I don't think this post is the right place to go into detail. But she doesn't like me because I won't 'conform' to what she expects and she HATES that she can't control me and I speak my mind. I don't take shit from anyone. But that is between her and I and not my partner and children. Honestly, she's fantastic with the kids and does a heck of a lot for them and to help out if need be. So, in some strange way, regardless of our differences, it's a situation we keep between ourselves, we don't do a lot of communication and we give each other plenty of space. We don't let it impact on the kids. I don't speak bad of her to them, her vice versa. In saying that, I won't go into her home without my other half, I won't create small talk or give advice even if I think she needs it and I won't sit down to have a cuppa with her either. I honestly don't feel like I should have to. So there is some common ground but only because she's had one heck of a warning from hubby a few years ago that if she doesn't sort her shit with me or put it aside, we will have a Court order making sure she never sees them again.
Obviously I don't know what's happened here but I wouldn't be comfortable with disliking and not trusting a woman this much and leaving her with my kids. My MIL hates that her son has to help around the house and share the household chores. She hates if I don't make dinner and I know she judges my home but I respect her as she cares about us all.
Is there no one else you could ask that would make you feel comfortable xx
Not an ideal situation I agree but no one else. As long as she's keeping her comments to herself and not telling me how to raise my children, I'm polite and respectful. Sounds like a lot of work but I do it for my children - not for her. She would never sabotage the conditions of me being with her son if she wants access.



 
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Old Dec 27th, 2017, 21:02 PM   15
lilmisscaviar
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My children will more than likely go to my mother's house since she is our only babysitter. Whether or not DH stays with me at the hospital during my stay or goes home to be with the kids during the night after the baby is born is up to my mother.



 
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Old Dec 28th, 2017, 03:13 AM   16
JessyG
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Elective section this time so can plan. My mum will come through to drop DD at nursery while we head to hospital. She will then pick her up at lunch tome and keep her at home until she either brings her in for visiting or my OH heads home to look after her and let my mum get away.

They want me out ideally by Friday (next day) lunch time so we may ask my SIL to have DD in the morning so OH can come to the hospital and pick us up.



 
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Old Dec 28th, 2017, 03:35 AM   17
Bonnie11
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I have so few people I can call on for help it's about the only good thing about me having a c section this time is that I can plan! So will have to find someone to watch her (hopefully my dad) when I go in and then maybe a friend in the afternoon till hubby gets home in time to put her to bed and then the same the next day I'm hoping and then that will be it! I'm fairly sure my husband won't be able to spend much time in hospital with me as she will be our priority but it's ok, unfortunately I don't have anyone around that could look after her/come to my house for a couple of days which would be ideal but there you go! So basically we are just winging it



 
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Old Dec 28th, 2017, 07:18 AM   18
BrokenfoREVer
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My dad and his partner were supposed to be having my DS. But after yet another let down over my scan that resulted in my DH sat in the waiting room with my DS and only being let in for 5 mins at the end, I've asked a friend to have him.

It's not ideal and I'm very worried about it tbh. But I have no one. I've considered trying a home birth just to avoid the issue but my DH is against the idea.



 
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Old Dec 28th, 2017, 09:32 AM   19
hellojello25
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We live with my parents currently, so my son will just be staying where he is and still going about his normal schedule and going to daycare while we are in the hospital.

However, there is a chance that I could be delivering while my parents and grandmother are away on vacation. They'll be 5+ hours away when I'm 37-38 weeks pregnant, so if that happens, my son will just have to come with us to the hospital. We won't have a choice unfortunately. I don't really think this will happen as I went late with my son, but there's always the chance.



 
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Old Jan 2nd, 2018, 01:16 AM   20
MindUtopia
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I’m having a home birth (my first was also born at home, she’s just turning 5 now) so she’ll be here with us. She’s really interested in birth and we’ve talked for a couple years now about what to expect so she is really prepared. She’ll either be asleep or downstairs playing or watching tv (we plan to keep her home from school, there’s no one who could easily take her and collect her anyway). If I need to go into hospital then my doula would stay with her. We don’t have family nearby and all our local friends either have small babies themselves (so wouldn’t be able to run to ours at 3am in an emergency) or they have jobs they can’t just not go to. Our closest family are about 2 hours away so if necessary they’ll drive down to stay with her if my husband needs to be with me for any length of time. Hoping it’s not that complicated though and she watches a film in the lounge through most of it!



 
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