Hello ladies! I'm hoping there's a few military wives out there that can help me. My husband joined the army last year and we haven't been at our current duty station for that long. So I haven't made many friends. :/
Well, his previous brigade deployed last month and he got to stay behind because we are expecting our LO in a few months. We both knew there was a chance he could still deploy but I thought it was unlikely, at least until after the baby was born. Well we got news yesterday that they need more men in Afghanistan so their sending a group at the end of this month and another group at the end of next month. Nobody knows exactly who's going yet but he's in rear detachment now and there's not a whole lot of guys so they're probably ALL going to Afghanistan. Including my husband..
I've never been through a deployment before and by the time he goes it will be too late for me to travel home. So I'm going to be here ALONE. I'm terrified of going into labor alone, and worried that my mom won't get here in time before the baby is born. I don't want to have my baby alone.
None of my family can just up and leave their lives and stay with me for a few weeks until Lilly arrives. I don't know what I'm going to do.
I don't know anyone well enough here to let them be at the hospital with me, not like they'd want to anyway!
Just the thought of my husband being in a war zone and me sitting in a hospital room all by myself giving birth to our first baby puts me in a panic.
I know it's not for sure yet if he's going, but they are pretty positive everyone is going. He tried talking to his command and asked if there is any way he can stay for the birth and leave after but they told him they don't know. They will get back to him. (yeah right.)

Has anyone given birth while your husband was deployed? And how did you cope with it??

Aww, sorry you are having to worry about this right now! Major hugs to you from one military wife to another.

I thank my lucky stars that DH and I haven't been through a deployment together yet (he's been 3 times, but he hasn't been while we have been together) but we will be going through one shortly, most likely during our LO's first year.

Is there ANY way your Mom or Dad (or anyone in your family/close friend) can come out? I know being at a new base sucks, heck I've been at our current base for 3 years and still have very few close friends! Are any of the other wives in your Husband's squadron that arepregnant? Maybe you could team up with one of them while your Husbands are away and help eachother through this difficult time?

Take one day at a time Hun. Like you said, no plans are final yet, so pray for the best! It's unfortunate that the military doesn't work with families during situations like this.

Sorry I can't provide you with more advice, but I just want you to know that I'm thinking about you and sending you lots of . Please feel free to PM anytime!

I hope he doesnt have to go!! My oh may have to go to Jordan 2 weeks before our baby is due Im praying he doesnt have to as we have a 2 year old as well and I have no idea how ill cope with a new born and a toddler on my own!! He went to afghanistan just before our sons first birthday and was in Canada for his 2nd birthday. He has signed out and will be completely out of the army by next Jan!! He hates being away and missing so many important family things.His reg are deployong to Afghan again in September so if he hadnt signed off he would be going then when the baby is only 2 months old which would mean missing christmas too.
I dont live on the barracks though so me and oh only see eachother at weekends or leave. I really wish I did though for the friends reason!! Where I live now there arent many other than those I work with
Are there any like gym classes or anything in the barracks for the wives (i know at my ohs there are- he is a PTI so sees all the wives meet up regularly). It may be worth you joining in and finding out whats around to try and make friends??
xx

my husband is deploying in 10 days and i am been induced in 5 days. hun your not on your own with it theres plenty of wives in the same boat as us could your mum not come afew days/week before you are due so you wont be alone? the army will bring your husband back as soon as you inform them you are in labour they will get him on the next flight back so dont worry too much about that hun he WILL be there with you it might not be for the birth but he will get there to see his baby but how long he gets when hes back...who knows depends how leniant they are going to be xxx

Army wife here

Im sorry you're going through this! It is always hard to hear that a loved one is gettin deployed. While I was not pregnant at the time, DH was deployed to afghanistan part of 2010 to part of last year. Yes it was tough, to say the least, but we got through it and so will you!

First, if it were me Id assume that he is going to go. Then if he doesn't it will be a pleasant surprise.

Next Id find out about the FRG-Family Readiness Group-on base. They can be a great support network during deployments especially, a place and group to socialize with, and who knows, some of those spouses may even be pregnant too! FRG is typically also a good source of information about how the brigade/unit is doing over there.

Then Id really start speaking to my family and seeing who can take one for the team. Surely there must be someone who can come for a couple weeks to help and be there for you. Yes it would be hard for them to drop things but this is a unique circumstance. Any siblings or cousins closer by that could help? Even if its a few days from each of a few different people to visit and support that would be helpful.

This is all really good advice! Doesn't the army suck sometimes?! Lol.

My husband is currently at Ft Jackson for a school (i'm at Benning where he's actually stationed) and wont be coming home til the 27th of this month, i'm due next Friday and being induced next Saturday if baby isn't here by then. But I have my DHs grandma here with me now so I wont be alone if I go into labor He's been gone since the beginning of March and I was alone for like almost 3 weeks until gma got here recently. I definitely wouldn't recommend being alone, especially at the end. I was so on edge all the time thinking I was gonna go into labor and have no one here, it was horrible

Hey jessica.

The military does suck sometimes doesn't it? I'm in a similar boat. We found out a few weeks ago that my hubby will be deploying before the birth of our baby and they won't be flying him back for the birth or even soon after. We will have to wait until his full deployment is over before he can meet his son face to face.

I was a little worried about everything, so i went and asked for a tour of labor and delivery and got to know the proceedures and staff better. I also took a class that they provided for labor and baby care at the hospital where the L&D nurses ran the class. I FELT SO MUCH BETTER after getting more familiar with the staff. They really seem to care and i know i will be in good hands.

Also, i looked into it and at least at this hospital they provide computers so you can skype with your hubby during your labor. Sure he won't be there face to face, but if they do that at your hosptial... at least you can hear his voice.


In addition, on bases they actually have people that help women in labor due to their hubby not being able to be there. You can always reach out and get one to contact you. You can find that information out by calling your OBGYN and L&D departments. I opted not to do that option. I rather just do it alone with the nurses.

I know my MIL is coming up 4 days before my due date. I hope baby waits until she gets here, but if he doesn't, then i know im in good hands with the staff. my family can't just leave for weeks at a time either. I suppose two alternatives would be either 1. you leave to go with your family before hubby leaves or 2. see if you can't get different family members committ to spending a week at a time with you... i.e. tag teaming it. You may not know who will be there for sure for your labor, but at least you'll have someone always there.

Hang in there sweetie and good luck!