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lupinerainbow Aug 27th, 2017 07:00 AM

Not sure where I belong
So we have been TTC for 9 years now. Never been pregnant. We have had a year break and not looking to actively try again for a few months. Want to get back into this forum as it's helped me so much over the years. Unsure if I should be in LTTTC or WTT I feel like the hope from WTT might upset me but can I be here when I'm on a break? Going back to fertility specialist when we are ready to speak about IVF because I'm nearly ready but have to consider my mental health as I have mental health problems which need medication which isn't great for pregnancy. Not always been on it so not related to ability to conceive. Needed the break couldn't put myself through it every month anymore. Really want to start trying again but need to be sure I'm ready for the disappointment and hardships that go with not being able to give your husband a baby.
Thanks if you read this :hugs:

givemeabump17 Aug 27th, 2017 08:04 AM

First of all, I am sorry that you have been trying for so long and that you are feeling this way. I think it is great that you are being so logical about putting ivf on hold n placing your mental wellbeing ahead. And I say this because one of my family member is dealing with mental illness and I know how important the meds are.

There are times when I also feel guilt towards my husband especially when af arrives. His family is also anxious for us to conceive which adds on to the stress for both of us. However, I think we (women) need to remind ourselves that conceiving is a shared responsibility between a couple and avoid the blame game (in this case self blame). Lupinerainbow, I hope that you will be able to get all other areas in your life in control so that you'll be able to try to have a baby soon. Will be waiting to hear your good news.

BelleNuit Aug 27th, 2017 13:14 PM

Hey, I think you belong anywhere on this forum where you feel the most comfortable :) I'm also taking a break right now too and I still poke around ltttc. We tried for over 20 cycles consecutively without a break (including a couple IUIs). I reached my breaking point and on the cycle where I declared that we were taking a break I didn't even ovulate! I'm mentally and physically done with this all. You're not alone in this!

LouisianaLady Sep 1st, 2017 07:43 AM

I am going on two years of TTC with not one pregnancy. I have a 10 year old from a previous relationship and now at 31 and my hubby with no children, we have been trying since we got married with no breaks, 3 failed IUIs on clomid. No concrete details of any issues besides a mild morphology issues and me with low progesterone. I don't understand why we cannot concieve. I am so drained and defeated.

red_head Sep 1st, 2017 08:30 AM

Hey, I think you belong here, you're welcome wherever you want to be.
I think you've been really brave taking a break and putting yourself first - that shows such strength!
We're five years now, three early losses.
It's a horrible journey but hopefully it'll all be worth it in the end.

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