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fordy Apr 28th, 2010 00:07 AM

advice needed
first of all i'd like to thank bnb for this area as it may help me in my current situation....
secondly i dont know if this is for people who are adopting etc or for the mothers who are pregnant and adopting out etc so follows my story....

i gave birth to a gorjuss wee boy 8 weeks ago i also have three other children whom are not my current partners children but they recongnise him as dad, my little sister whom is 26 yrs old cannot have babies due to her epslipy (spell?) so me and my partner had a big long talk (took like 3 months lol) and decided when jack was born we would try for a baby for my little sister using my eggs and his sperm however i had planned to wait at least a yr before trying as i wanted my body to recover.

two days ago i was feeling sick the normal pregnancy signs and took two tests both came back positive we were using condoms but unfortunley one i am pregnant my sister is over the moon which i am really grateful for bringing such light to her life but the problem is how can i give up a wee baby??? i look at my other children and i think i couldnt live without them. I had planned on getting counselling etc before falling pregnant and now that i am pregnant its hard on me i dont wanna say i wanna keep this baby and make her miserable but i dont think i could keep the baby anyway with being so close to jack in age.

i dont believe in abortion either and i know i should have been a bit more safer in that respect but things like this happen in every day life not just to one person.

so the advice i am seeking is how can i give up a beautiful little baby???:cry:

pink_bow Apr 28th, 2010 00:43 AM

aww hun this must be incredibly hard for you :hugs:
Could you not start councelling now? I do think you should speak to your sister though and tell her your fears, you need to be honest with her.

Good luck in whatever you do xxxx

Cariad_bach Apr 28th, 2010 03:16 AM

Aww hun thats a really difficult situation,

I plan to become a surrogate but im hoping to be a gestational surrogate (not using my egg)
I know being a Traditional Surrogate is easier physically but harder emotionally IMO :(

I agree with Pink_bow in that counseling now would be a good idea and total honesty from day 1 with your sister would be best,
Im sorry i cant help more hun xxxx

CareBear Apr 28th, 2010 03:59 AM

I also agree start counselling now and maybe contact social services or an adoption agency as they may be able to give you some advice. Good luck x

pinkmummy Apr 28th, 2010 08:15 AM

What a wonderful thing for you to do for your sister :hugs:

I agree with everyone else, the sooner you start counselling and 'detatch' yourself from the baby the easier it will be, good luck and I look forward to following your journey xx

nicholatmn Apr 28th, 2010 12:03 PM

Counseling and any type of support you can find! Trust me, giving up a baby is difficult! If you truly know you want to give up this baby, please start getting emotional help right away. Hormones makes this even worse.
If you need any help, please feel free to PM me! xx

fordy Apr 28th, 2010 23:51 PM

thanks ladies i am seeing my doctor on monday so will work something out with him also it could be my hormones at the moment i cant be anymore than 4 weeks pregnant lol but thanks once again i'll be using this area for the following months to come and i hope on making a journal too :D

Charlotteee Apr 29th, 2010 04:17 AM


Im confused though atm. Are you carrying her child at the minute? Or your own?


buttonnose82 Apr 29th, 2010 05:45 AM


Charlotteee, for what i understand she is pregnant with a baby that is her egg and hubbys sperm but the baby is for her sister :)

BabyHaines Apr 29th, 2010 06:38 AM

I know you must be feeling incredibly torn, but whatever you decide, good luck xxxx

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