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Old Oct 25th, 2017, 08:19 AM   1371
BelleNuit
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Thanks Ask. I'm very happy about your news. Time will fly and in the meantime enjoy everything you wouldn't be able to do if you were pregnant

I'm not feeling quite so confident about a surprise bfp since I've never been pregnant, but stranger things have happened I suppose. In number of cycles we have been trying for 2 years. I was reading that only 5-6% of people aren't pregnant after 2 years of trying and that 2-3% of people are truly infertile and may never conceive. Such a bummer.

Sorry I've been feeling down lately. Brothers wife announced their pregnancy on Facebook yesterday. Apparently they had a very difficult 2 months after their miscarriage. Before immediately becoming pregnant again. I just can't take it seriously. Yes mc is awful, but they hadn't been trying long enough to really appreciate it. I may be biased but I think my situation or RPL is far more devastating.

Lately I've been thinking about doing the IVF I'm April and doing a freeze all so that we have some time to pay down the cost of the procedure before (ideally/hopefully) getting pregnant. I feel like the process of getting pregnant has been so difficult that I haven't really considered what we would do if it did happen lol.

Must be in my tww because I'm feeling moody again!



 
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Old Oct 25th, 2017, 09:30 AM   1372
Ask4joy
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Those are pretty grim statistics Belle but I do think IVF is going to work for you. As you know there are many stories of people trying for years without a single pregnancy and then have great success with IVF. I’m guessing that 2-3% probably have known major causes of infertility and that very few in that category are unexplained, but I could be wrong! Still, it sucks to have to go through all this and to have to spend your life savings and then some to try to make a baby. This better freakin work!



 
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Old Oct 26th, 2017, 04:29 AM   1373
smurphy90
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Belle – Fingers crossed for you. I hope it doesn’t come to it, but I think IVF could really work.

Ask – Glad to hear you have 5 good embies! Good luck with the hysteroscopy.
AFM – I’m usually not too hyped up during my tww, because I just don’t expect anything to happen, but I think I’m more hopeful than I’d like to be because it’s the first medicated cycle. I try to keep my hopes in check, but then that backfires into complete pessimism. I wish a middle-ground existed. Haha

I’m not going to test until Nov 4th. I don’t know if the medicated cycle will change my LP, but it’s usually 15 days, so I should get AF on the 4th.



 
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Old Oct 26th, 2017, 13:43 PM   1374
Pinkee
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i'm still here!


Ask - still magnificent amount you got there. and now that you have a date, wooo! exciting. I hope your hysteroscopy goes well and painless.

greenarcher- never tried maca, I hear a lot of girls swear by it. I did do the Soy Isoflavones and it screwed my cycles up really bad, and for months.



smurphy90- I know a lady in Australia who had a progesterone test at 6mg/mL, and got a bfp at 10dpo. We were all super baffled its been really great though. Her doctor flat out told her she didn't ovulate and tada.


Belle- I don't know who fills out those statistics but I have been here for years and seen girls who ttc 3-9 years finally get a bfp. Bodies change so much and adapt, and we have so many supplements and interventions it's hard to take those seriously. I think you just have to write your own story

Me- I am so moody and anxious. I don't know how we are going to BD when I am compelled to argue over socks on the floor. Taking opks and nothing yet, so there's still hope When I got pregnant with Charlotte my positive opk was on CD17.



 
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Old Oct 26th, 2017, 16:16 PM   1375
red_head
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Hey guys, sorry I’ve been a bit quiet, just trying to give my brain a rest from baby thinking! This is my last cycle of clomid so fingers crossed, although I’m not holding out much hope. I go back to the fertility doctor in a couple weeks so will make a plan about how to move forward then, although from December we were going to stop trying, but I don’t know if I can bring myself to go through with it!
Ask I am so excited for you it’s ridiculous! I have nothing but positive vibes and premonitions for you! I had a horrible hsg (although it was more the scenario and after effects that were bad than the pain from the procedure) - I know it’s not the same but similar so I know it’s nerve wracking, but I’m sure it will be worth it.
Sara I know it’s hard getting your hopes up, and every step we take closer makes it harder to control the optimism, but even if this isn’t the month, I’ve told myself that each month is my body gettin more and more ready for it! Fingers crossed for you!
Pinkee - you made me really laugh with your post - I get so grumpy at ovulation time it’s ridiculous - plus I have cried after sex round that time so many times!! I just start blubbing after, while laying with my legs and butt in the air wailing about how I hope his swimmers like me!!. My poor husband! Haha - luckily I’m in the moment during the deed so the crying only starts after!! In fact the only time I don’t seem to be emotional is when I’m on my period!! Lol!
Belle -I was debating whether to say all this or not - I hope you don’t take it wrong but I was upset by what you put before - my second miscarriage was without doubt the worst most devastating thing I have ever experienced in my life, and like ltttc, you can’t imagine what it’s like unless you’ve been through it (and I say what as someone who was diagnosed with ptsd following trauma in my teens). Even being pregnant for a day, no matter how long you’ve been trying (and even if you haven’t been actively trying long, a lot of people spend their lives waiting for the time they do start anyway), all your hopes and dreams and your future is in that pregnancy. To then have to literally pass that out your body, feel it disappearing from you and flush it away down the toilet is truly horrific, plus all the tests and scans that follow. Everyone has their own tolerances and ways of experiencing and coping with pain, so even though it may seem they’ve had it easy compared to you, you don’t know what it would be like in each others shoes. This experience is nerve wracking and hard for everyone no matter how easy it may seem, and all we can do is support each other. The statistics are scary but often inaccurate and so many people have happy endings - we had a period of around three years with no pregnancies, so don’t discount yourself - you never know what’s going to happen. Things really seem to be moving in a positive direction for you, so I’m sending lots of positive energy your way!



 
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Old Oct 26th, 2017, 17:21 PM   1376
BelleNuit
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Red I am not speaking to your situation and I am sorry you took what I said so personally.

I am venting about my brother and his wife. These are two people who should not have children. I was relieved when they miscarried the first time. This is not a happy pregnancy situation. I am jealous as to the support that is offered to people who miscarry. It's not there for people like me who go on and on and on with nothing. I don't think their pain is comparable to mine (as in my brother). They got pregnant after the first month trying, miscarried and got pregnant again the next month. In my mind that takes away a lot of that pain. Sure it hurt a lot in the moment, but it was quickly replaced with a new healthy pregnancy. This may not be a popular opinion but I am not here to debate or defend my opinion. I don't care if this makes me sound like a horrible person because I already feel like a horrible person. Infertility is destroying me and nobody fucking cares. But they swooned all over her for her miscarriage. Fuck it and fuck her.

And I do not accept being an aunt as some sort of consolation prize. I want nothing to do with their baby. In fact I will probably avoid or get blasted drunk at future family events. I am devastated and I am angry. So damn angry. But I'm just supposed to take it and take it and take it. I would welcome a miscarriage if it meant I would have a healthy pregnancy the very next month. Sign me up.



 
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Old Oct 26th, 2017, 17:37 PM   1377
red_head
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You aren’t alone in this, and we all care. None of us are horrible, we’re just reacting to a horrible situation, but comparing or judging others experience just causes more pain, whether you think you know the ins and outs or not. What you’ve said has got under my skin and I apologise if I responded too strongly or read into it wrongly. Obviously the nature of what we’re going through causes heightened emotions and I let mine get away with me.



 
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Old Oct 26th, 2017, 17:40 PM   1378
BelleNuit
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Well I'm not doing it to their face or to anyone I know. I'm expressing the way I feel on an anonymous chat forum because otherwise I will be eaten alive. I will not apologize for how I feel. I feel my situation is worse than theirs, 100 times over. I would trade spots with them. In an instant.



 
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Old Oct 26th, 2017, 19:49 PM   1379
Ask4joy
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I understand needing a place to vent, Belle. And I understand feeling like the pain of nothing is worse than the pain of losing something...my pregnancies were so brief that I didn’t get any sympathy really from close friends or family that I told about them. I’d get comments like, “well you tested so early...” or “the tests are just so sensitivite now...”. Finding out you are pregnant and losing that pregnancy is completely heart breaking, but so is never getting pregnant when that’s all you want. Both can be very dark and depressing places. It’s okay to feel angry and vent here.



 
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Old Oct 26th, 2017, 20:35 PM   1380
BelleNuit
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Thank you Ask. I'm obviously not in a good place with their pregnancy and I'm lashing out on here because I feel like it's a safe space. So thank you for holding that space for me.



 
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