It seems like when you are a LTTTCer all you can think about is the negative, but this morning I got to thinking about what I have been able to do while TTC. If we had gotten pregnant right off the bat I probably wouldn't have made the decision to go back to school. I still desperately want a baby but it is always nice to think about a positive.
Also, I feel like me and my husband have gotten stronger - If we can survive infertility, we can survive anything.
After all - everyone always says "everything happens for a reason" Maybe this was my reason...
We've obviously learned a lot with through ttc about our own bodies, so I'm greatful for that. Not to mention it has forced both of us to get healthier and I've lost a good amount of weight...still going.
I was diagnosed with pcos maybe about 5 years ago...when I wasn't ever thinking about having children, so it wasn't that big of a deal then, but now my cycles are regular, and I know that I O on my own regularly, and my tubes are open. When we first got married, I told my husband I didn't know if I'd ever be able to have children because of this (and an underactive thyroid) and now I know that I can.
It also gave both of us an opportunity to fish our Masters degrees and the hubby went back for another degree in the meantime.
We definately have arguments, every couple does, but the arguments don't seem to last as long and I don't have a fear of us not making it anymore (men and trust issues from my past).
So ttc has been a hellish process, but in the end I am greatful for it and all it has taught. It's taught patience if nothing else...lol.
Your right, its so easy to focus on the bad, when your having problems conceiving. I have learned alot about myself, and have grown up alot in the last two years. My husband and I are very close and getting closer every month with every BFN, he is definately my rock (as corny as that is to say). I also have come up with lots of hobbies to keep my mind off babies, especially during the TWW.
I love thinking about all the positive aspects of trying to conceive, and I know us LTTTC ladies will appreciate our pregnancies and little babies that much more after this journey!
I tend to think that bringing children into the world might not be a good idea anyway ... we are overpopulated and what will the world be like in 50 years? A great place for our children? I'm not sure. So if I never have children I at least console myself with the fact that I will never have to worry about anything bad happening to them, and also I am not contributing to overpopulation. It's a depressing view but it gets me through my months and years or inexplicable infertility...
My husband and I have only been together 3 years and 1 year married, we have been trying for 18 months. Not getting pregnant quickly has allowed us to enjoy time just the two of us and travel to places we have always wanted to see. Having fertility problems/investigations has also made us closer and I think when we do finally have a baby we will appreciate it all the more because we really feel like we deserve it.
Though I knew before, made me realise what a hero my OH is. Been together 8 years, he helped me through my grief of losing my mum and has stuck by my side during the past 4 years TTC and is very happy for us to go down the ED route, which was such a relief. I am very lucky to have him.
I love this thread....I am grateful for LTTTC, because it has offered me and DH time to get closer, travel, and fall more in love (if that is possible)
I also am more excited for when I do actually get pregnant because I know I will not take any moment with my baby for granted. I will love her/him and not complain about any of it! I will be grateful for every good, bad, and ugly moment! I dont think I could have said that if I had gotten pregnant immediately.
I too feel that I have grown closer to my DH, and that together we can now take the world!
One thing I have recently realized is that when we have children, we will be able to have unprotected sex for the rest of our lives not fearing conception! And if we conceive others, what miracles they will be!
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