Neither are really great options I think. I don't really want to go through IVF, and neither does DH, but that's our choice if it comes to it. We'd both love to do adoption, but it's possibly more expensive than IVF, and a much harder, longer process. I really hate that you basically have to interview to prove your worth and capability as a parent, but anyone with or without the means can get pg on accident. I'd rather spend $20,000 and have a baby within a year or two, than possibly waiting a decade to be approved for one. I would love an adopted child just the same, I just don't want to wait forever.
I agree 100%, your right about having to prove yourself, when most people can have babies at the drop of the hat. Ideally i would adopt over IVF, but it doesn't make financial sense, and the emotional investment is just so high. My husband and I live very modestly, we have a small house, we both work but we are not rich, I doubt we would even be approved for an adoption!
Where I live in Ontario the cost of private adoption is the same as IVF. I think for us dependent on my surgery may 9 we will pursue IVF first. Dh is adopted himself but working in family law the likelihood of adoption of an infant less than a year is so small unless there is voluntarily adoption through private agency.
It sucks that both wys are ridiculously expensive. The only other thing is potential foster to adopt however children can and do go back home. Sigh not a fun process
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