The 'chit chat' thread

you just need to keep busy hun and the time will fly by x I'm doing ok taking each day as it comes. We're pretty busy starting up a business which launches in 2 weeks and looking into moving house as well and its my Little boys 7th b'day in 2 weeks as well and he's having a party in a week and a half so plenty to keep me occupied atm!

Originally Posted by WILSMUM

you just need to keep busy hun and the time will fly by x I'm doing ok taking each day as it comes. We're pretty busy starting up a business which launches in 2 weeks and looking into moving house as well and its my Little boys 7th b'day in 2 weeks as well and he's having a party in a week and a half so plenty to keep me occupied atm!

To be honest, time is going fairly quickly, although in the first couple of weeks after it happened i think time had stopped as the seconds felt like hours.

Sounds like you are busy atm which is good.

Time has gone back to normal now. keeping busy looking after 3 kids. taking them places. Daughter does gymnastics on a tuesday and my son does cubs on a tuesday and football on a friday night.
He is also studying for the 11+ grammer school exams and he goes to a tuition centre every saturday for 2 hours. So we have plenty going on.

Even though i am kept busy I am constantly thinking about everything, i suppose that`s how it will be now.

I`m no longer a happy person. i used to love this time of year, all the daffs coming out and spring appearing everywhere, but this year I just don`t care.

We live by some lakes and i took my daughter and youngest son for a walk earlier, a beautiful day, ducks everywhere but I just didn`t care.

i hate this feeling, but at the moment there is nothing to take it away.

Anyway time to go for the day now, teas to get, baths to be had- roll on 8.00pm when all in bed and i can sit down and watch BGT!

Hi everyone,

Sorry for my MIA in the past week. I've been busy with helping my friend preparing her house for her 2nd baby who might appear anytime now.

dancareoi - I had to wait for nearly 3 months after my miscarriage to see a consultant who specializes in 2nd trimester losses. He was the one who concluded my tests results and explained the steps needed in my future pregnancies. The wait was dreadful as I was keen on TTC again but there was this nagging voice in my mind to wait to find out the cause of the miscarriage so I will know what to do in the next one. Well, with that said, I did find out that I was pregnant 4-5 days after my consultant appointment.

Never got my AF after my miscarriage so I don't really know if that was a good thing. Now, I am ... maybe 4-5 weeks pregnant and I keep thinking something is or might go wrong because I did not get my 1st cycle. Also, no symptoms yet!!! I remember the last round, I got sore nipples quite soon after my BFP but now, NOTHING.

Oh well... as our motto says ... ONE DAY AT A TIME!

Originally Posted by yellowyamyam

Hi everyone,

Sorry for my MIA in the past week. I've been busy with helping my friend preparing her house for her 2nd baby who might appear anytime now.

dancareoi - I had to wait for nearly 3 months after my miscarriage to see a consultant who specializes in 2nd trimester losses. He was the one who concluded my tests results and explained the steps needed in my future pregnancies. The wait was dreadful as I was keen on TTC again but there was this nagging voice in my mind to wait to find out the cause of the miscarriage so I will know what to do in the next one. Well, with that said, I did find out that I was pregnant 4-5 days after my consultant appointment.

Never got my AF after my miscarriage so I don't really know if that was a good thing. Now, I am ... maybe 4-5 weeks pregnant and I keep thinking something is or might go wrong because I did not get my 1st cycle. Also, no symptoms yet!!! I remember the last round, I got sore nipples quite soon after my BFP but now, NOTHING.

Oh well... as our motto says ... ONE DAY AT A TIME!

Hi, the waiting is terrible, it concerns me more because of my age, i feel we are wasting time.
we tried to get a private appoinment, but that is a longer waiting list!
I assume you are now in Oz due to the time you posted this thread!
It will probably do you good to be away from the `norm` for a bit and hopefully will help you relax a little, which can only be good for your PG.

every pregnancy is different hun, doesn't mean anything is wrong - i no its easier said than done but try and relax and enjoy it - helping yr friend will keep you busy and keep yr mind off it and before you know it u'll be there having that first scan!

If you don;t mind me asking (and i'm sure u've already said but my memory is awful!) but was this yr first mc? and did they find any cause for it?

WILSMUM - Yeah, it was my first pregnancy and first miscarriage. We were TTC for about 14 months before I conceived with help of Clomid + Acupuncture. I was tracking my ovulation with OPKs and BBT; I did not ovulate throughout the time I was tracking it. So with the current BFP, I only went for 1 acupuncture session to get things going. It was like 11 weeks without AF and GP said to give my body another 3 months! I got impatient so I went with the needles. I ovulated on that afternoon because I felt really damped so I tested with OPK.

Tests came back positive for bacteria infection to the placenta which caused my body to go into labour. The doc said bacteria must've attacked my cervix and made its way up to placenta. So next pregnancy, I will have to start on antibiotics, progesterone and cercival cerclage after 12 weeks' scan.

dancareoi - After a week here in OZ, I am getting bored. The main purpose of me being here is to help her with her newborn when she appears. I was to help with clearing out the house and preparing the nursery too. She had a 2 year old toddler and a not so helpful husband. BUT with me pregnant now, I can't really lift up/down boxes, etc. I do try to be gentle with my movements knowing in my head that my cervix isn't as strong as others. It's all in my mind, I know... so I think my friend isn't really very happy with the this situation. Nothing we both can do because she paid for my flights before I found out that I was pregnant. I told her that I would still come over and help her out as much as I can. I guess at 38 weeks, she can't do much and me being "fragile"... I don't know. I feel bad but I can't do anything about it. Her husband is a terrific dad solely in charge of the 2 year old but hopeless when it comes to house chores.

A little rant from me - my friend just let out some steam to me earlier. She said I shouldn't really be THIS sensitive about this pregnancy because it is at such early stage. Perhaps she just wants me to not get my hopes too high if anything bad happens. Also, I had 1 sided sharp pain in the last 2 days and I voiced out my concerns to her about Ectopic pregnancy. She said she thinks it was normal and I shouldn't always think of the negative side of things. Thankfully, the pain is gone today PLUS no bleeding at all. My point is that ... maybe because she is having her #2 and both being normal, I shouldn't jump into panic mode at every twinge.

*sigh* honestly ladies, in real life, I feel so alone at times especially when a friend disappoints me by making me feel like she doesn't understand what am I going through. I already fell out with my bestfriend of 17 years because at the 2nd month of my son's death anniversary, she basically told me to shut up, seek professional help and move on. Somehow, I feel these mothers who have not suffered a loss do not understand the hole we have in us. On the other hand, I get more sympathy from girlfriends who don't have children! But with mothers, all of them have the same thinking. Because my son was only 16 weeks + 5 days gestational, he wasn't a baby thus I shouldn't mourn because there isn't anything to mourn for.

Maybe its my hormones playing up...

Originally Posted by yellowyamyam

WILSMUM - Yeah, it was my first pregnancy and first miscarriage. We were TTC for about 14 months before I conceived with help of Clomid + Acupuncture. I was tracking my ovulation with OPKs and BBT; I did not ovulate throughout the time I was tracking it. So with the current BFP, I only went for 1 acupuncture session to get things going. It was like 11 weeks without AF and GP said to give my body another 3 months! I got impatient so I went with the needles. I ovulated on that afternoon because I felt really damped so I tested with OPK.

Tests came back positive for bacteria infection to the placenta which caused my body to go into labour. The doc said bacteria must've attacked my cervix and made its way up to placenta. So next pregnancy, I will have to start on antibiotics, progesterone and cercival cerclage after 12 weeks' scan.

dancareoi - After a week here in OZ, I am getting bored. The main purpose of me being here is to help her with her newborn when she appears. I was to help with clearing out the house and preparing the nursery too. She had a 2 year old toddler and a not so helpful husband. BUT with me pregnant now, I can't really lift up/down boxes, etc. I do try to be gentle with my movements knowing in my head that my cervix isn't as strong as others. It's all in my mind, I know... so I think my friend isn't really very happy with the this situation. Nothing we both can do because she paid for my flights before I found out that I was pregnant. I told her that I would still come over and help her out as much as I can. I guess at 38 weeks, she can't do much and me being "fragile"... I don't know. I feel bad but I can't do anything about it. Her husband is a terrific dad solely in charge of the 2 year old but hopeless when it comes to house chores.

A little rant from me - my friend just let out some steam to me earlier. She said I shouldn't really be THIS sensitive about this pregnancy because it is at such early stage. Perhaps she just wants me to not get my hopes too high if anything bad happens. Also, I had 1 sided sharp pain in the last 2 days and I voiced out my concerns to her about Ectopic pregnancy. She said she thinks it was normal and I shouldn't always think of the negative side of things. Thankfully, the pain is gone today PLUS no bleeding at all. My point is that ... maybe because she is having her #2 and both being normal, I shouldn't jump into panic mode at every twinge.

*sigh* honestly ladies, in real life, I feel so alone at times especially when a friend disappoints me by making me feel like she doesn't understand what am I going through. I already fell out with my bestfriend of 17 years because at the 2nd month of my son's death anniversary, she basically told me to shut up, seek professional help and move on. Somehow, I feel these mothers who have not suffered a loss do not understand the hole we have in us. On the other hand, I get more sympathy from girlfriends who don't have children! But with mothers, all of them have the same thinking. Because my son was only 16 weeks + 5 days gestational, he wasn't a baby thus I shouldn't mourn because there isn't anything to mourn for.

Maybe its my hormones playing up...

Just think of it as a time to try and chill out and relax.

Unless someone has been through what we have they have no idea how we feel.

My mom can`t understand why i am so desperate to have another and out myself through all this worry again, but she never suffered a loss and she accepts that she doesn`t know how it feels.

In the other hand, my sister had two MMC in her first 2 pregnancies(hers was a problem with rhesus negative blood which was resolved with anit d injection - now has 2 girls) my cousin also lost one.

also my cousin has been trying for her second for over a year(40 like me) but nothing is happening. So I have people who I can talk to about this, so i am lucky in that respect.

Try not to worry to much, just take one day at a time and try to be gentle with yourself.

by the way, my name is Lisa, less formal than userid!!

noone can no wot it is like or how they would react inthis situation unless u go thru it. I know girls from here from when i had ailsa that have suffered losses snd then gone on to try again and untill now i couldn't understand why they would take the risk of it happening again.

Originally Posted by WILSMUM

noone can no wot it is like or how they would react inthis situation unless u go thru it. I know girls from here from when i had ailsa that have suffered losses snd then gone on to try again and untill now i couldn't understand why they would take the risk of it happening again.

i know our hubbies have been through the loss, but I feel that men don`t seem to understand this desperate longing either.

My DH is being the sensible one, thinking with his head, all the things like what if were to happen again, how would we be then, how would it effect the kids.

i know all this, but the feeling of overwhelming longing and desperation for another , to me, out weighs all of that. i think it must be our strong maternal instinct that makes us feel like that, our need to have children.

i sometimes think if we could swap bodies for a short time, even 5 minutes would do it, he would then understand exactly how i feel.

Hello Ladies, hope you are all feeling ok today! sun is shining, I'm going to try to be positive today! xx