Lemonflower I found blocking him on fb helped! Also I have been considering seeing a councillor just for someone to listen to how I'm feeling and give an outsiders view!
I do pity his new gf already! She has no idea what type of man she's got involved with, although she had a warning as she's fully aware that we were together 4yrs and he left me pregnant, so whatever happens I have no pity then! She may think eveythings rosy now! But he will become abusive, is the most selfish person on this planet and he will not give a shit about her in 2yrs time!
I'm starting to see that this was a blessing everything that he done to me, because if he hadn't I would of never escaped from a relationship I was so unhappy in!
I guess me and my daughter are the lucky ones! We are lucky not to have him around anymore!
It is sad so many of us are in this situation but my Mum is definitely right, especially as I am having a boy. It will probably turn out a blessing that he doesnt have his biological father in his life as what kind of influence would he be? He would teach him terrible values and i dont want my son exposed to that.
I believe in karma too, he will get payback one day and if he can not care less about his own flesh and blood, he is certainly not going to be a dutiful, faithful and loyal man to any woman he gets involved with. I know when my baby is here I wont regret having him one bit but at the moment I am getting days where I wish FOB was not the father of my child.
Yeah he is with the same girl - though I don't think he cheated on me - then again he's been so heartless I wouldn't be surprised if I found out that he did. We split late Sept and he got with her early by Dec, they moved in together early January.
Talk about quick! Cut me like a knife when I heard!
I had the counselling in Dec and it helped so much. Like you said an outsiders point of view is sometimes better than family and friends.
Also, I laughed when my counsellor suggested this:
Write down a list of pros and cons. I was surprised that there were way more cons. It's easy to look back on the relationship when it's over with rose tinted specticals.
I was also asked the simple question of: "what do you love about him?".
I couldn't really answer and said, "he makes me laugh".
Counsellors reply... "he's not now".
Let go of blame too! I blamed myself so much:
I should have had sex more with him
I shouldn't have nagged him
I should have taken more interest in his hobbies
I've let go and now think that even if I had done the above I don't want to be with a man who left me so callously and did all the things he did to me after the split to hurt me - whilst pregnant with his child.
Once I found out my FOB was cheating on me he was openly flirting with the girl and going around town with her openly in public and who knows what else. I'm so heart broken about all of this. I'm so sorry about your situation.
Honestly... I wouldn't even let him know that I was going into labor or invite him to the birth. If he shows such blatant carelessness and disrespect, I certainly wouldn't want the stress of his presence on such a beautiful day, when I'm trying to perform the most challenging task ever! If he had any shred of a heart at all he would then see that his role as father is a privilege, not a right--one that he has definitely given up! Your story really makes me emotional for you Be brave for your little one and protect that child from that asshole!
So..... its my turn to find out that FOB is now considering dabbling about with other women or probably has done already. Boy this hurts. It hurts so much to have someone you love leave you in this condition and then be cruel and heartless and start moving on with another woman. Today he posted on facebook that he hadnt had sex in years???! ( WTF? Am i the virgin mary then?) and that he was lonely and missed sex. Then these women respond and he is lapping it all up asking one if she is free tomorrow night and that he misses boobs! She and him are flirting on there and looks like something will happen between them. What a horrible person he is. If only she knew the truth!!
I seriously have given up on men for life, this is the cruelest treatment I have ever received from a man and all I did wrong was love him, ill never get over this, my poor baby, with a father like that
But your lucky lucky baby with a mummy like you, who's being brave enough to deal with this with FOB & bringing up a LO alone. Just try & move on & forget all about him. It's his loss. Big
I'm so sorry honey, this is why I deleted my ex husband off my Facebook, so i can't see who he's talking to... Mine gave his number to a girl when I was 3 months pregnant and we were still very much together.. lied to her about me, lied to me about her.. they were shopping together, getting lunch, he even had a second number to text and call her with.. ended up leaving me home alone 7 months pregnant on my birthday to hang out with her until 5a.m. with condoms in his pocket.. then came home to me and lied about where he was, kissed me, apologized for being out so late.. even had sex with me the next day... Men are scum. I was cooking his meals, dragging his laundry to the laundromat, doing all the shopping, the cleaning, etc while he was showering another woman with the affection I was begging for.. how do we even begin to trust men again?
I was told recently "someday a man will thank your ex husband for leaving you, so he could be lucky enough to have a chance to love you properly." Try not to let your pig of an ex get to you, its his loss.
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