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Old Apr 14th, 2012, 05:24 AM   #1
trinaestella
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FOB keeps threatening to take my daughter away from me :(


So I am not really single, we are up and down at the minute. He's a good person most of the time, but he has this kind of anger which I really don't like.. He's not really around for Aliyah anymore, he's just here when he wants and doesn't do nothing it's almost like he loves me more than our daughter, and so everytime I break it off with him he threatens me saying that I can't do that because I have his child now and he's not going anywhere because she's HIS, almost saying it like he does anything for her and actually gave birth to her.. He said this morning she is all his :S, I have to force him to bond with her it's actually disgusting!
So now, he keeps saying he will just take her from me and walk out the house, and even though I am not sure I believe it I am really scared he will do it, so just for future reference if this does happen; is there anything I can do? What can I do to get my daughter back?

He doesn't do anything for her, I am the one that is her mother and father, and he loves me more than her. He's 18 and I am 19 so we are still young, but personally I think he is much more immature and has to use our daughter against me. I just wish I never had a baby with him, and it's really getting me down. I want the best for my daughter and I honestly feel like I have failed her.


 
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Old Apr 14th, 2012, 11:46 AM   #2
BigZai
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Idk the law but in some cases its kidnapping so id talk to a lawyer and find out what you can do. It is a very serious thing but many parents get screwed because they dont count it as kidnapping and then something bad happens like they never cOme back then the cops are like "oh guess you were right, well hes probably thousands of miles away and theres no way we can find him" then your stuck with you lo on a milk carton because the fing cops said it wasnt kidnapping after such amount of time

I dont want to scare you it just pisses me off that this happens


 
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Old Apr 14th, 2012, 11:55 AM   #3
BigZai
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Get custody worked out if you have that and he takes her and it violates with your rights its kidnapping


 
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Old Apr 14th, 2012, 12:00 PM   #4
BigZai
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And end it for good anger issues dont resolve and its not worth it


 
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Old Apr 14th, 2012, 20:33 PM   #5
Terukki
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He sounds like a douche bag and you need to leave him. I'm not sure how the law works where you live so I can't give you any legal advice. It wouldn't be a bad idea to talk to a lawyer.


 
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Old Apr 15th, 2012, 10:20 AM   #6
jemmie1994
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leave him hun he sounds way too much hassle and you deserve better, about him taking Aliyah just dont let him near her he has no right to take her from you speak to a solicitor if he keeps saying he will take her away


 
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Old Apr 15th, 2012, 10:22 AM   #7
v2007
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TBH either be with him or not.

I know that sounds harsh but he is screwing with your head.

His anger issues, threats of kidnap etc would be enough for me to tell him to leave and to organise proper access.

If you don't sort it you will be in a cycle which your child will be victim to as well.

V xxx


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Old Apr 15th, 2012, 17:04 PM   #8
Snowball
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^^^ Agree

If he's on the birth cert he can legally take her and the police can do nothing but check on her welfare. However, if you can show that your daughter has always been mainly cared for by yourself then you can get an emergency court order and she'd be back with you in no time... I know this because my ex threatened similar.

I do think you'd be better off without him


 
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Old Apr 16th, 2012, 10:04 AM   #9
Abby_
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I agree with what's been said, he really seems like a douche! More for the fact that when you threaten to end things he uses his daughter as some kind of tool to keep you together.
Talk to a solicitor and get proper custody arrangements.
You or Aliyah don't deserve to be messed around like that.


 
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Old Apr 16th, 2012, 11:19 AM   #10
xxsteffyxx
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Even if a father is on the BC no man is allowed to take your child without permission. If he took your child and was no permitted to do so the police could take the baby off the father and return her to you... Yes, it is true. If a father is on the BC it does not give them a legal right to spend time with that child. They have parental responsiblity over the child, but if he is not the main carer which in most cases they are not, an officer CAN and WILL take a child away from a father if he does not have permission to do so.

You need to speak to your local council as this is a serious issue. Child abduction happens and whether a man is bluffing or not it can make you feel very vunerable which ultimatly can make your child upset.

Anger leads to all manner of violence. My relashionship started with anger, threats, shouting and him putting me down. It then went to him making threats about our child and he would take harvey from me, it then went to him being violent and anger towards doctors and health visitors when they wouldn't give him informtaion about me or Harvey and then it got physical where he attack me and a friend in front of Harvey in public.

If you want to chat hun feel free to PM me, but my suggestion would be to get out of that relashionship before it gets worse. Your child does not belong to him and he would never be allowed to have her without your consent. Don't let him bully you, there is a life away from him... Xx


 
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