Home
Momtastic
Site Map
Help
Register
Log In
 

Go Back   BabyandBump > Parenting Forums > Teenage Parenting


Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old Mar 31st, 2012, 18:28 PM   #21
abbSTAR
Other
Chat Happy BnB Member
 
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: South Wales
Posts: 1,363
A lot of men find it hard to bond with newborns as they are fragile and can't do anything, as soon as she is more bouncy an starts babbling/sitting/walking/talking he will enjoy it more for sure! It a thing a lot of men find hard to begin with especially with their first. Give it time but it's no excuse for him to treat you like he is! Hope things work out soon x


 
Status: Offline
 
Old Apr 2nd, 2012, 09:31 AM   #22
we can't wait
Waiting To Try (WTT)
BnB Addict
 
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 6,175
I'm glad he came around a bit. Babies are stressful and hard to adjust to for some people. It may just take a little time. You have to really commit to trying to make it work now that you have a LO to think about (he does, too!) I hope his changes are permanent!

Good luck.


 
Status: Offline
 
Old Apr 2nd, 2012, 10:06 AM   #23
Amber4
Mum (Mom)
BnB Addict
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,725
Things have been good the last couple of days. Yesterday baby was crying and he couldn't settle her. He just wanted to cuddle her to sleep and she was playing up. So he gave her to me and said "she doesn't like me. Only settles when I feed her" made me quite sad but I tried to explain she's just used to my voice after I carried her for 9 months. I said he and her just need to bond more : flower:


 
Status: Offline
 
Old Apr 25th, 2012, 00:11 AM   #24
AmberS
Mum (Mom)
Active BnB Member
 
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Ceres California
Posts: 405
Same here. Except FOB is more interested in me then our son. Soooo, long story short - I'm not longer with him, made him move out. I told him that Drake isnt some toy you can play with whenever you feel like it. He lives the next street over and barely sees his son once a week. He's 23 and has never had a job/ sits around all day playing video games. I told him until he gets his prioritys straight, im not going to go out of my way and take time out of my day to take Drake over there to see him. He acts like its not a big deal.. But w/e. I've found that it is SO much easier doing everything myself instead of constantly having tension in the house and arguing all the time. Hope everything works out in the way that you want it to!


 
Status: Offline
 
Old Apr 25th, 2012, 21:04 PM   #25
kittycat18
Pregnant (Expecting)
BnB Addict
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Northern Ireland
Posts: 3,992
I am really sorry to hear what you are going through sweetheart I can't imagine my OH acting like that but he was extremely selfish during my pregnancy. The best thing for you to do is to talk it through with him and for you to tell him exactly how you are feeling. If you speak to him and he is still acting extremely selfishly then you will know in your heart what is best for you and your LO. xox


 
Status: Offline
 
Old Apr 25th, 2012, 23:03 PM   #26
tasha41
Mum (Mom)
BnB Spammer Elite
 
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: The True North Strong & Free
Posts: 25,627
I hope the change lasts. Maybe he just didn't realize what parenthood would really be like, with newborns it can feel neverending. It does suck about his parents though, unfortunately not all grandparents are super involved so I'm glad that yours are at least there and showing their support, interest and love


 
Status: Offline
 
Old Apr 26th, 2012, 15:28 PM   #27
Amber4
Mum (Mom)
BnB Addict
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,725
Thank you girls Everything has been fab recently! We have our days (but who doesn't?) He's really stepped up and he's a great Daddy now and a great OH. Now he's more used to Brooke he seems a lot happier and he feels he can look after her without asking me what she needs ect. Still no improvement with OH Mum and Dad tbh I give up with them even though I'm still pretty sad about the way they are with her. xx


 
Status: Offline
 
Old Apr 27th, 2012, 06:03 AM   #28
cammy
Mum (Mom)
BnB Addict
 
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: NSW, Australia
Posts: 3,003
glad to here things are good with you, was a little worrying reading your first post. I hope things continue to be this way. Honestly it reminds me alot of my OH and how I really wanted to leave but I'm glad I didn't, because he is back to being the man I knew.


 
Status: Offline
 
Old Apr 27th, 2012, 06:36 AM   #29
Amber4
Mum (Mom)
BnB Addict
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,725
Quote:
Originally Posted by cammy View Post
glad to here things are good with you, was a little worrying reading your first post. I hope things continue to be this way. Honestly it reminds me alot of my OH and how I really wanted to leave but I'm glad I didn't, because he is back to being the man I knew.
Thank you lovely. I'm so glad your OH has gone back to how he was, and I hope it stays that way. I have read your posts before about him and it didn't sound good, but no one ever posts the good bits in their relationships, iykwim? So people only see the bad side when we are ranting etc. Do you know why your OH was acting the way he was?


 
Status: Offline
 
Old Apr 27th, 2012, 07:02 AM   #30
cammy
Mum (Mom)
BnB Addict
 
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: NSW, Australia
Posts: 3,003
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amber4 View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by cammy View Post
glad to here things are good with you, was a little worrying reading your first post. I hope things continue to be this way. Honestly it reminds me alot of my OH and how I really wanted to leave but I'm glad I didn't, because he is back to being the man I knew.
Thank you lovely. I'm so glad your OH has gone back to how he was, and I hope it stays that way. I have read your posts before about him and it didn't sound good, but no one ever posts the good bits in their relationships, iykwim? So people only see the bad side when we are ranting etc. Do you know why your OH was acting the way he was?
I think it was just a lot all at once. We have always been soooo tight on money, which restricts us a lot. The fact that he went from a very low paying job to a job making 4 times the amount but he couldn't actually spend or save any of it for himself was a big depression point for him.
Alexander was also a very sick and colicy baby and he always thought the baby didn't like him and it was a hard job, he was a very demanding baby.
All that mixed in with no sleep, car troubles ALL the time, living with me for the first time, having me and bub to care for, the fact that all our friends stopped talking to us and he could never go out.

It was really just a huge mixture of things which we should have talked about along the way but instead bottled it all up for a good year. Until recently this year we had a HUGE talk and we really figured everything out. Sure it took alot of tears and harsh words, but we are happy now. And we have hardly fought at all this year. Big improvement. He is also super helpful with the baby now.

I think having a baby, whether planned or unplanned, teen or mid30s, it is harder on the men.


 
Status: Offline
 
Reply

  BabyandBump > Parenting Forums > Teenage Parenting


Bookmarks

Tags
thought

Thread Tools






SEO by vBSEO