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Old May 28th, 2012, 06:57 AM   1
pigginteacher
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Behaviour advice for 20 month old.


I have two issues at the moment, firstly she refuses to go in her car seat, I have to battle with her for what seems like forever and then I end up getting really cross and shouting at her, especially when I have to get to work. I have tried remaining calm and explaining why she needs to go in her car seat but she is so stubborn. I have even bribed her with food, which I really dont want to get into the habit of doing. Secondly, she's started pushing other children, if they go near her while she is playing she will push them out of the way and when I take her to the childminder, the first thing she will do is push over one of the other children. I have spoken to her in a firm voice and if I'm out removed her from the situation which normally results in a full on strop. Am I not handling this correctly?? It can be so embarrassing and when a friend said she was a little bully (apparently jokingly) i knew I needed to seek some advice. I know they go through phases and maybe it's just a case of going through the phase and managing it as best I can??? She's started hitting and pushing her older sister too!! Any tips would be great, thanks x



 
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Old May 30th, 2012, 15:32 PM   2
pigginteacher
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Anyone??



 
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Old May 30th, 2012, 16:09 PM   3
OmarsMum
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Hi Hun, if you don't want to bribe her with food (i wouldnt call it bribery, it's distraction which is so normal) you can give her something else to distract her like a toy or your phone, I know it's not the best solution, but if distraction works just go for it. Once she's older she will understand that she should go into her carseat, Omar is 2.5 years, he doesn't have issues with going into his carseat but he has his moments, he stiffs his back & refuses to go into his carseat. I found that distracting him is much easier than trying to explain the reasons. I do tell him that it's not allowed to sit in the backseat & I do explain to his that it's dangerous later when we're moving when he's in a better mood & ready to listen.

As for pushing other kids, I'd just move her away while explaining to her nicely that it's not nice to push other kids as it hurts & I'd encourage her to apologize.

Today when we were at a play group Omar was too bossy with his cousin & he started to push him, so told him it's not nice, & he will get hurt. He stopped immediately hugged & kissed his cousin & said sorry. He's older than your LO so he understands more. It gets easier when they're older.

HTH



 
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Old May 31st, 2012, 01:16 AM   4
Luzelle
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Hi. I agree with previous poster. Its just easier to distract them. she isn't really at the stage yet where you can 'bargain' with her or explain so that she will understand well. How about getting a small dvd player that fits behind the headrest of the car? My son hates the carseat, and since I got that dvdplayer he is okay to go in his carseat. I put the dvd on for him and he is content. I make sure that it is one of his favourite dvds and he only gets to watch that one when he is in the car.
The hitting - my son is 17mths old and also hit for a little while. He got over it in a couple of weeks time. Talked to him sternly and removed him from the situation just like you did. The kids keep us busy hey. He is not a bully, he is just physically strong as well as very independent so he keeps me on my toes.



 
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