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Old Aug 14th, 2012, 15:05 PM   1
Mum (Mom)
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Location: London
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Selfish behaviour?? Help!

For the past two weeks or so Lucas behaving very differently and goes absolutely mad if anyone tries to touch his things. Mostly with other children, if anyone touches his ball or whatever else we are playing with he shouts "MINE!" and snatches.. if challenged he then will actually hit or push whoever the child is. How can I stop this??

He is doing the same with adults although less extreme.

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Old Aug 14th, 2012, 15:48 PM   2
Mum (Mom)
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I think it's fine for children to have some of their own toys that they don't want to share. We wouldn't want to share all of our personal belongings if someone walked into our house. So for starters I would use scripting to teach him to say something like "that's mine, please don't touch" or "I'm playing with that". He might just want to assert his ownership of the object, in which case "ask me first" may help. Once he's said his script to another child, you can help protect his toy against snatching if necessary, so that the situation doesn't escalate.

Then, if it's not a toy that's particularly important or significant to him, or a toy belongs to a group, you can explain that he needs to share so that other children can have fun too. Give him the option of playing together with the toy or taking turns with a timer (one with a beep works fantastically for younger toddlers). If he can't resolve the issue, then the toy is put away until later.

This is a fantastic book to read with toddlers about sharing.

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