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Old Mar 18th, 2017, 05:51 AM   1
Mum (Mom)
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When one child gets left out..

I have 3 girls, (6,3.5&2.5) and they aren't the best at playing nicely together. Hannah, the youngest, is happy to play with anyone who allows it, and is really good at playing so she doesn't have many problems... but I find that she would rather play with my eldest (which is fair enough because she is better at setting things up etc)
The problem I have, is that Ella (3.5) seems to get left out, purposely, by her sisters. Obviously Hannah is just copying Paige because any other time she is happy for her to join in, but most of the time it is Paige being nasty and horrible and excluding Ella.

My ex (their dad) has just phoned me and asked if I had noticed it happening, so obviously it is happening there too, enough for him to ask me about it.

I feel so sorry for Ella sometimes, because she clearly is feeling upset that she hasn't been included in a game. Paige gets in trouble for being mean, and quite often gets tablet taken away, sent to her room or no treats, and she got no pocket money last week because it was happening so often.

What do I do? Even when they aren't arguing and moaning at each other, it seems to always be dd1 talking and giggling with dd3, and dd2 feeling a bit ignored and left out.

I think most of it is down to their ages. Dd1 still sees dd3 as a bit of a cutesy baby whereas dd2 is more 'grown up' and tries to be like dd1 which probably annoys her a bit.

I spend alot of time with dd2 when her sisters are at school/napping, we bake cakes, do playdoh, magazines, crafts etc... but I just feel so bad for her. She is a very friendly girl, and loves to play. A bit of a bossy boots when playing, but what 3.5yr old girl isn't?

What can I do to keep them all happy, keep the peace and not feel guilty about one of them being left out?

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Old Mar 18th, 2017, 18:00 PM   2
Gym knickers
Mum (Mom)
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 1,108
I don't really have any advice but hope you find some way around it. We also have three girls with only 4 years between them. Dd1 and 2 are currently very close but definitely get on each other's nerves and are either best friends or mortal enemies. I'm anxious as to how dd3 will fit into the mix. I already feel for my middle girl as she's not the eldest doing everything first or the baby of the family so sometimes gets overlooked. I'm trying hard to spend 1 on 1 time with her as that 'middle child' syndrome always plays on my mind. I'm guessing that at different stages in their lives our girls will always get on better with one sister or another which may be quite a challenge but that they will hopefully be super close as adults.

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