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Old May 18th, 2018, 03:31 AM   1
Mum (Mom)
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i just want my daughter to go to nursery

hi all. i feel like i only come on here to moan and ask for advice. i apologise if anyone thinks oh its her again lol. basically im trying to understand if we are having no luck with nursery or if this is normal.

i tried my daughter last september at a nursery just down the street. she was 2.5 and i was heavily pregnant. they were not the best. i wont go into it to much but i and six other mums took our tots back out as the settling in period was not good at all. info was lacking. the kids were all screaming without a member of staff to help them as they were busy. we were all standing in the room still on week 3 looking after them ourselves.

anyway it took me ages to feel ready to hand her over again. i researched and found a family run nursery, its a 25 minute walk but so much better, the staff all talk and smile. they have good food. they seem really proffesional and interested in your child as an individual. we got a welcome pack with all the info we needed. the other nursery never did any of this so it all appealed to me.

my daughter went for a twenty minute play while i filled out forms. she loved it. she went back two days later stayed for an hour and loved it. she went back for a teatime play for an hour and loved it. i was told she could do two more sessions, a dinnertime one 11.30-1.30 and an afternoon play 2-4 then she can start.

she did not settle as well on the lunch session. she clung to me abit. when i went back to collect her she was soaked from playing in the puddles and refusing them to dress her. she was teary too. they decided she needed another try at the lunch time session. i felt abit disappointed that they took the time down to just an hour and half but went along with it. this was yesterday. her dad took her and she clung to him. had ten minutes of tears and was apparently ok for the last 45 minutes.

we were hoping they would increase her but instead they suggested just an hour monday!! my partner was going to discuss her going for 3 hours but after that he suggested two hours. the nursery said she could but he said he got a vibe it might be a pain for them as she is having a member of staff with her at all times at the moment. she then said can you brin her in wednesday morning for a session too. shes not even supposed to be going wednesdays but i guess we can take her down.

im just feeling its inconsistent. the settling in sessions are not getting longer but they are trying to shorten them and they seem so random. it will be her 4th week next week. shes supposed to be going 11.30 till 5.30 in the long run. we have worked out and told the nursery she has been more negative since the lunch sessions. she enjoys the play but the eating and sitting down is all massively new to her. she is used to being home and knowing what she can have for dinner. she has got to get used to eating meals that she may not get at home etc but i think the playtime is going to help her relax and then the eating will be easier for her.

anyway i just feel like because i dont work they think i can keep doing this. i will do my best but my oh is working from home at the mo so he can run her down on his breaks. my baby needs a feed at dinner. i am so desperate for some time with just the baby at home so i can get things done. i am really struggling with housework at the moment. i cant leave my toddler with the baby as she is obviously at an age where she could hurt him. the baby wakes up more and is less happy to lay in his pram. i feel i spend half my time telling my dd off. she is going through a stage where she wont listen and trashes the house again. i feel like we both need this but it seems nurseries wont take them until they go in smiling and excited. i dont mind if she was gradually going up an hour a week but i feel its going nowhere at the mo and its wasting our day going backwards and forwards. she is never going to get used to it at this rate as she will just think she goes home after an hour and its over with.

any advice?

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Old May 19th, 2018, 08:40 AM   2
Mum (Mom)
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Assuming you are paying? I would just tell the what goes you would like and drop off and pick up those times, she has done her settling in time so now it's time for her to go the hours you are paying for.

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Old May 22nd, 2018, 13:00 PM   3
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She's only been there 4 weeks and if she's pretty much always been with you it's very new to her. A routine will help and I think she needs to go more than an hour a day to get used to it.
I think her behaviour sounds very normal and you probably just need to bite the bullet, and leave her for her set hours- that's if you're confident they are a good nursery

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Old Jun 3rd, 2018, 16:23 PM   4
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I pulled Gracie out of nursery for the exact same reason. The first nursery we went to was unacceptable, she was still in the baby room. They had 5 babies and only 3 high chairs, the other two went in jumparoos and didn’t get to eat until someone was finished. They used one hankie to wipe all the babies noses, and had no idea about dietary requirements (I had to explain that egg wasn’t dairy) and they only pinned up their curriculum as I mentioned I was a teacher. The food was terrible too, they sold it as “healthy” yet fed her junk like chicken nuggets and wotsits.

The second nursery was better in terms of recourses and such like, but the settling I. Period was terrible. I’d to leave work three times because she was “crying” within the first 15 minutes. It was really bad!

Our situation was slightly worse as we both worked full time, in a teacher so couldn’t just leave and my fiancé worked over an hour away on a good day. We had to pull her out really quickly. I don’t know what I’d do in your situation!

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Old Jun 7th, 2018, 14:34 PM   5
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At my nursery, that I work at and my son attends, we do 2 settling in sessions and then children start fully.
I remember on my son's first day I had to be called out of work as he wouldn't settle but it never happened again and to be fair he was in a right state. Some take longer to settle than others and if it's good nursery then they should be well used to helping children to settle in and finding things that they enjoy doing which will help them feel more comfortable, for example my son used to love Paw Patrol so his key worker planned activities involving that.

Can you schedule a meeting with the manager to talk about it?

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